During the past few weeks I have honestly felt stressed with what could be a lifechange for me even at my advanced age .. well I say that with sort of tongue in cheek because I'm only 69 *s*. But anyway, it's nothing bad or harmful but challenging is the best I can put it. Raised and am Catholic, but like alot I didn't practice for several years until the last couple. Only reason I have is that in my 30's thru 60s it didn't seem convenient or comfortable to me to do so except off and on until a few years ago. When you kind of approach death that kind of happens that you try to go back. Well things change even when you do not want them to. I got to know my pastor simply by getting back and of course the confession and but also doing some volunteering and disclosing in one of my confessions that I did not feel I'm doing enough now for free since I am semi-retired. He knows about my wife Char's situation also. Well a couple of weeks ago he blurted out would you consider applying to become a deacon. So, that is what I am really struggling with now. I met with him for an interview along with a deacon last Thurs. This is why I have not been on here for last several days because I wanted this interview, but was afraid of it.

I reveived forms and instructions because Fr. Joe and the deacon felt there is a reason to go forward. I have to tell you tho that I told one of my best friends about this and the interview when I went to dinner with him and his wife earlier in week and typical of Dr. J ( just my nickname for him since weve been friends for a long time - he calls me Mr. T) he advised me to dye my hair because it is almost pure white now (picture an older Clint Eastwood). He is a very very good person but now that his job has been eliminated he is very sensitive to age discramination when you are in job search so he was attempting to give me good advice. We ended with a good laugh in that I would be applying for a job but that IF I did apply I am not worried about the 'employer' discriminating.

It would be a long road. I know it takes about 3 to 4 years of study and service in good health etc. I would be almost dead by then ! *s* But serioulsy, whether this works out or not, if I even applied it would be up to Him. The big ? is Char and priest asked me this. The wife has to agree and promote any candidacy. Char is Methodist by baptism but we had a sacaramental M in the church. There is no way that I would let myself to have this upset her if I agreed to be evaluated. Char is the most honest open woman I have ever known. I know when I told her this a couple of weeks ago she was upset because she didn't understand how this would affect us. So, if she says no it is no and if she says yes then I will have to search my conscience if He wants me and how would I handle it. She is vascilating and after I talked with her today and as with her she asked me "how much will you have to work" and "I suppose you'll wnat me to got there now", etc. etc.

This is going to take a long while but I just feel this is a different time for me now.

Thanks,

Tom

Tom, what a GREAT opportunity for you! I certainly hope Char gives you her enthusiastic support. Keep us informed here, my friend.

ETA: As you get deeper into the studies, you'll learn the requirements for beatification. I doubt that your pronouncement on 03 April, of "Saint MaritalBliss" qualifies!

Tom, you have been given the Call! Congratulations! Let us know as you make your decision and begin your process.

t/j
I'm gonna pray for you, you hide-bound sinner, you.

Well done, Tom.

I'm gonna pray for you, you hide-bound sinner, you.
At last - support for MY side!

Well NG marital is one of those silent saints - giving when she can and balancing her other obligations. No miracles yet on her part, but ya never know..*s*

I haven't talked to my pastor since last week, but am going to confession Sat. and will talk again with him and tell him I want to but I have questions. The stuff to fill out isn't a problem, like age and married in the church, my history (altho I am an alcoholic), are our kids baptized, and work history and volunteer stuff and mainly why someone like me would even consider this. And then permission and agreement from my wife for this and that even with this we will stay married. Despite out situation of being apart Char told me other day she agrees and will do what she needs to IF we can be reunited here in the Chicago area, which I think we can rather than me moving there and even if she has to move back to cold weather.

Marital right now for me the most important thing before I ever attempt to apply is for me to feel comfortable in the long road - service, volunteer stuff, for years, and if I'm fit to do it and am up to it. So that is where I am now just contempatng and pryaing lots.

Yom

So hush, NG

Only you can answer that, friend. What are your thoughts?

So hush, NG

MB, YOU'RE the silent saint, remember? I'm the raucous sinner!

I kind of figured that 'hushing' would be a bit of a stretch for you!

wow, just very tired tonight. I feel I could sleep thru the night until about 8 am tomorrow. Think it's partly my leg hurts now more back of my leg than the knee and think I again overdid it a little so am going to have supper and use ice and watch a movie til time for bed. It's also did the volunteer shift at local library today. It's called 'shelf reading' NG and it's about going thru shelves one at a time an making sure the books are arranged by Dewey Decimal system order - i.e., to correct books looked at and put back by patrons out of order. I will tell you what tho, it may seem like a simple thing, but if it's something I can do to help them I am very happy to. Only thing is my eyes wear out after trying to distinguish between 338.337838 and 338.337938. It's one of my jobs now and I am committed. The people I've met there are absolutely great and this is going to work out. This is part of the 'misnistry' or volunteer things my pastor and I talked about a couple of weeks ago, but I had planned to volunteer quite awhile before that.


There are a couple of amazing things NG, the first is that I inquired around back in Feb. in my area about volunteering and hardly any response, even from Catholic Charities. So, I was disappointed. But then a few weeks ago opportnities started flooding in. The library sitch was from my own inquiry, but there are just a lot of other things now. One of the things is next week an interview with a gal at an area horticultural garden and museum looking for volunteers to do gardening and working in a greenhouse. I love gardening, have grown tomato plants and geraniums (two of them are now two years old overwintered), so yea! I may be able to offer something and also learn something. To even begin the process tho of what I now feel a calling for does require working directly with people in some ministry - the homeless, young adults, those in need of services, etc. The one thing that I have been advised on is discernment - trying to match your talents with the need and not just hop into something for the sake of trying to help. This is something I am still evaluating in my own mind.

I think that marital told you to 'hush up' and those words remind me of a joke that Fr. Tony Ricard told at our parish mission several weeks ago: A prayful old woman always knelt outside on the steps of the church each morning to say the rosary. She always arrived early in the morning and her priest never woke up in time to unlock the church. One morning there were workers up on a scaffold painting the church. She didn't notice them. One of the workers thought to tease her and yelled down "Hello down there". She didn't seem to notice and kept praying. So, the guy shouted down again "Hello down there, how are you". Again, no response from the prayful old lady. This time the worker wanting to get a reaction yelled down "Hello down there , this is Jesus". This time without even looking up the prayerful woman shouted back "Hush up! I'm talking to your Mom!"

Tom

So this burglar breaks into a house, and starts rifling through drawers getting jewelry, etc. Suddenly, a voice rings out: "Jesus is watching you!"

The burglar looks around sees no lights on and chalks it up to nerves. Suddenly the voice returns: "Jesus is watching you and will have retribution!"

Now the burglar looks more thoroughly, and sees a parrot in a cage in the corner. He says, "Hello Mr Parrot! What's your name?"

The parrot answers, "My name is Joshua."

The burglar asks, "What kind of person names a parrot "Joshua" ?"

Says the parrot, "The kind of person who names his attack pinscher "Jesus". Good luck!"

NG, that one is good!

My heart is heavy tonight. Lots to consider now and my mind is spinning. Tomorrow is the feast (or Sunday) in my liturgy that I now value most - divine mercey sunday - even over Christmas or Easter in my own mind. It's not this day that I dread because I went to confession today, but in my confession today to prepare for tomorrow had what I would say the most meaningful discussion with the priest I have ever had. The thing I disclosed which I haven't here is that I have come to realize that Char and I can never live together, except if I am disabled and need nursing care in the same facility. There is too great a risk to both of us and perhaps others even in our own house, or in a condo or an independent living center. This is an evaluation I have picked up on from several others and I've realized it myself the last two years even tho I tried to fight for living together. However, I haven't been honest or direst with Char even over that last year because I have been too cowardly to directly tell her this. So in that I have kept her hopes alive that we can live together again and I sort of defer and dodge and weave and I am not proud of that. I was hoping she would realize this on her own without me directly telling her. So, the good father advised me I need to address this sooner than later and that means ASAP even tho she will be angry resentfull and accusatory. He assured me something that seems strange that it doesn't affect my interest in serving the church, but that it does affect my peace of mind in trying to help others. He honestly told me that he feels I am a person with integrity but my wife's situation shows on my face.

Well NG, tonight I feel alot of pain. I am not despondent or anything like that because tomorrow's feast in my belief offers forgiveness directly from Christ. However I do realize that even with that assurance, it is not an invitation to trip back to where you were, but to keep progressing in faith and honestly even tho painful.

I sometimes wish that the younger ones who come here facing the pain of adultery could realize that there are other (older) people too who face the pain of loss and uncertainty.

Thanks,

Tom

(((Tom)))

I do hope tomorrow at Mass you will find some peace. Peace be with you.

The revelation of the future limitations on your life with Char, if you accept it and understand it as part of the Plan for you, is actually a gift, Tom. It may not be painless to absorb, but knowing, and acting on, what is best for a marital couple has always been a part of spousal duties.

Tom, I too went to Mass yesterday morning and was almost knocked of my seat by the Deacon's talk. Referring to your Doubting namesake, he was speaking to the actions, and beliefs of people who have lost faith in what the Plan is for their lives. "Some ask, why do I have heart problems, or suffer cancer? Why should I suffer marital issues?"

Well, basically he just described my life from 2006-9! Bride knew the impact on me, squeezed my hand, and cried.

I once heard faith described as belief in something in spite of all evidence to the contrary. You and I have the advantage of experience to bolster our faith. Too many "graybeards" employ experience to refute the value of faith.

Your new opportunity speaks to your faith in having something to give to others, personally and vitally. You will, I believe (have faith?), someday have impact on people as our deacon did yesterday on me.

The revelation of the future limitations on your life with Char, if you accept it and understand it as part of the Plan for you, is actually a gift, Tom.

Hi NG,

Well ya know you're probably right. Sometimes it's just discouraging tho because alot of us, including me, already have our lives planned out!

You're message is appropriate for me at this time. Haven't felt like being on here or being able to sit in the chair long enough to due to the hamstring thing coming back. Apparently I pushed too hard from the last time and a relapse now. So have had to stay down since last Wednesday.

I did talk to my W last weekend and try to explain as best as I could that we're not simply going to be able to live as we did and why I feel she needs the care she is getting now even tho we can't be together. Surprisingly NG she didn't react as I thought and just told me that she felt I had come to this awhile ago. There was not any blame or anything like that just sort of sadness that this is our situation. She told me that she understood why I was holding out for hope and that that is the way I am up until the last minute. We ended by just discussing how we can at least see each other more and be together with her here and I am working on that. That is the toughest part because IL is the most backward state in the nation in terms of any kind of assistance or development, especially for the elderly and those with mental illness. There are options tho.

Ya know NG, your description of faith is good, but I think it also implies something additional that is stressed here for a marriage - Trust. I feel that faith involves a trust - that altho we all in some way feel pain or discomfort in our lives, that it is not in vain, but that for each of us, it is an important part of God's infinite Plan, even tho we are oblivious to it for awhile. We fall down yea. I did - in cursing and swearing and getting hyper and all that last week when I couldn't sit or stand or lay down or relax at all without feeling pain in my leg. Ya know what NG, I happened to have this thought at that time that there are so many feeling more pain than I am so who am I? I recall sort of a nentimental story from several years ago when I was in treastment about the footprints in the sand on a beach. About seeing only one pair of footprints in the sand of Christ carrying the poor guy who was suffering (from somthing). My faith tells me there should be two pairs of footprints - one limping, another walking tall and strong, but both sets of prints moving forward.

Well anyway, am recovering I sort of am getting to like evening TV with my leg up and watching Honeymooner, Twilight, etc.

Take care,

Tom

Just an update on me...

I felt good today after giving away a couple of geraniums to a couple of elderly neighbors here. These are just tiny things but the people seemed happy and that's enough for me. They are a year old and am happy that I was able to overwinter them and they are starting to grow again now. The weather in the Chicago area is unseasonably warm now, so am out today starting outdoor gardening. I bought a few new ones today, and it just makes me feel revived that I can anticipate new plants to grow and that the older ones have a new home.

Tom

I am just happy to say that after a week and half of struggling with my leg injury that today I feel I have finally been able to walk and functuion w/o severs pain. I was able to bring plants outside today and planted a few new ones without alot of pain. This ordeal has taught me one thing - I need to give back as best as I can and while I am stil able to in the most simple way. Just my belief.

Tom

You're doing so well, Tom. What's happening with your call to minister?

Tom, how are you doing with the opportunity to become a Deacon?

The reason I ask is that a friend of mine is going to be ordained as one this evening here in NY. He gave the homily at this morning's Mass, and said, "Tonight, I'll not be worried that the Bishop might tell me 'No'; I'm worried he might say 'Yes'!"

Hoping things are well with you, my friend!

Hi NG. I'm progressing. I've had talks now with my Pastor, an assistant from another parish, and deacon in my parish. Nothing exceptional but just seems lots like a job interview is all I can say. Our deacon really impressed me with his story can calling. It's really amazing because he felt a calling to the Priesthood as did I. He felt that in his 20's and I was 18 and did go to a seminary for two years. He told me that his feeling to do this was just too much time taking and not giving back and that sevreal years ago he heard and felt something that he should give back. My application has been submitted, but these interviews are all a part of the process. I know that they are looking at me and i am looking at them. As far as time NG we are talking about at least hhree years - time at Mary of the Lake seminary sudying and time demonstrating my worth in this. The studies are emphasized NG because w/o that you cannot represent His Church! I would have to begin my education in Sept. of this year at the seminary. We will see, but it isn't scary.

Marital - just going to be a long process. From what I have heard back is only two concerns are age and if and how much I may be distracted or interrupted by my wife's situation, and those are legimate concerns. So, this is not up to me really, altho I do desire to do this, it's up to Christ and if this is really a true calling. Is all I can say now. Thanks Marital.

Tom

Tom, I hope the impediments you mentioned are not deemed more weighty in the decision than your commitment to the calling. But whether this goes any farther or not, you can take some satisfaction that a number of people recognized in you the possibility of your providing such a blessed service to your fellow man.

NG,

Tonight I don't feel really very blessed! I know, that sounds egotistical but I'm just very tired tonight and my leg feels painful now even sitting. My son will be driving me to dr. tommorrow afternoon. This has been 3 weeks now and altho it's not nearly as bad as when this started there are some days when I feel there is no progress. I cannot recall when I have felt this debilitated in the last 30 years but I am beginning to realize when it comes to my own pain I feel like a coward sometimes. Everyone is upset because I have tried to heal this myself but tonight I feel I am back to week 1. Went to do some gardening at my church but now I think the movement today pretty much set me back. I love watching 'Three and half Men' on cable but couldnot get thru it tonight. Hate going to dr's but this has to end somehow. No, I'm not worrying about any impediments - Christ alone will decide if this is for me but I am just having a hard time focusing and thinking clearly with the pain.

Thanks NG

Tom

What's the deal with the leg, Tom?

Hello HHH,

Son took me to the dr. yesterday and is what I was told and suspected in late March with first episode, hamstring muscle strain or tear moderate level. I'm taking his advice now and keeping it wrapped with elastic bandages during the day and limiting my activity and heat applications. Thanks for asking H but I hate being down and know that I probably didn't allow it to heal in first place.

Tom

Am preparing for a weekend retreat starting sat. morning which is encouraged for anyone who desires to enroll for any ministry in my parish including youth ministry, prospective deacons, PADS, foodbank, etc. etc. It's not required but strongly encouraged. So, will be out of pocket for awhile. Have no idea who is going to lead, but it's usually a priest from another parish or a member of an order who travels to do these. So, I hope the guy is good..*s*

After a long while after initially inquiring about volunteer opportunities here in my area and difficulty in getting in contact with anyone and my hanstring problem, the last couple of days sort of flooded - have an interview Friday morning with a local museum and garden for simple maintenance and maybe some gardening, and an application for the judicial court here for assisting people on probation and in jail, and catholic charities. Am still volunteering at the local library, and have not even carefully considered the ministires (volunteer) at my church and I feel I am saving that for the last. I'm being careful to not just rush into anything at all and am still looking for what I can offer in relation to the need. I sort of feel bad tho that I've lost a month now due to my leg, and maybe partly that I have allowed myself to slack off.

Char is doing allright. She's upset that I could not get to visit her in April as I had planned. I didn't feel up to traveling for the last month and it's been tough to just get around here. We have talked alot about our situation. I do not have the funds to afford a private care facility here in the area for her to stay in this area. She requires a nursing home, and where she is now is much better than anything.

Just talked to her in past few minutes and had to interrupt my thread. She is going to have an MRI on her knee next week due to her knee and possible torn cartigage. I promised her that I would visit her in June just before her birthday. It's just tough. Know what tho, we are still together if not physically but at least emotionally and in spirit. I look in on the survicors' forum and it is really tough for me to see so many many BH's wimp out at such an early age in terms of their marriages - because it is too tough for them! I honestly do not have understand them altho I do post ocacaionally.

Tom

Hamstring injury? Tom, you might consider cutting back on the full-contact handball games!

Glad to see you're still exploring your options. Enjoy your retreat, and learn all you can!

NG, Yep, no handball or nothing else strenuous. Just trying to get back to normal activity. Man you know what NG I cannot wait until I get to take the wrap off my leg in evening at home - it supports the injury during the day but wow it feels good and normal now. I have not had this kind of injury since high school. I've been fortunate. I'm looking forward to the retreat, my son will look after our cats an things here.

I sometimes feel I am too out of place here with even posting here. I have found many friends now here in my community, and I feel I have found many friends here at MB, including you and others, and of course St. Marital. And am saying this honestly, and am feeling the relief now with my leg injury subsiding. I know there are so many opportunities now in my life to give back for what I have received and that is what is so exciting to me now.

NG, take care my friend,

Tom

I now realize I must be a sentimental type for a guy. Had a busy day today and when I finally turned the TV on to start to relax, I think it was AMC was showing American Graffiti. Have seen this or parts of it several times - Char and I saw it when it first came out - but man it IS a great 'coming of age' film. I had talked to her tonight earlier and it was too late to call her after it was over, but am going to tell her I saw it again tomorrow nite. I remember when we first saw it, well of course we were starting our own lives together, but I remember we each had memories to share with each other about the '60s as we started to date seriously in '67 and we weren't that far removed from the '60s. She was not my first serious gf, but she was my most fatal! Well, again, the presious memorirs do make me week in the knees, and I think of myself as a cowboy, and Char would agree..*s*

NG, had a couple of interviews today - the one at the gardens here and was accepted to do just basic maintenenace volunteer work, and it is an astounding place. And I finally connected with the volunteer coordinater at catholic charities and have an appt. to meet with her next Thurs. She replaced the guy who was in that postion before and then resigned after her became a deacon and assigned to our parish. I want to tell you tho that I am not just trying to run through hoops on volunteering to try to see if I have a calling nor to satisfy any requirements. It is because I want to do this now that I am semi retired to simply try to give back what I should have been doing the last several years. There are some concerns, not impediments as such, but my age - 70 next month - and my wife being away in a nursing home, and the stress of the studies at my age. Ya know what tho, if you really deep wown and I mean deep down that Christ is tugging at you, and you in your own mind attempt to discern what He wants, better not refuse and better find a way to answer this by just simply being just simply being honest and accepting. I feel sort of now like Donald Driver - a great Packer and a great player, and a good dancer too, but maybe a little too long in tooth to stay with his original team!

Anyway, however this goes and I have no clue now, I am looking forward to the reatreat this weekend.

Tom

Enjoy the retreat, Tom! And enjoy the journey as you make your way through the whole business of volunteering!

Just wanted to send you some good-luck mojo for your appointment with the Catholic charities person.

And when you get a free moment (which would appear to be about to become scarce in your life!), drop us a line about the retreat, okay?

Hello NG, Marital, et al.,

The interview with charities went well last Thurs. I didn't check my email for most of the holiday weekend. Was contacting people I wanted to use as references - they do a full background check and require three references, which is appropriate. When I got online this pm found that mty eamil wasn't working, but I could at least read new emails and they want me to report tomorrow morning to work in one of their good banks, Can do. This is a new bank they have established for clients with HIV and other clients, all with special nutritional requirements. I'm looking forward.

Otherwise just assembling documents - references, copies of my diplomas, resume, etc. One of the things I knew was on the list is baptismal certificate and I just assumed I had mine. Well after searching the last couple of days and not finding it I realized I don't recall ever getting it from my mom. I probably did at some point and probably lost it. Just need to inquire to get a copy of it.

NG I am so happy now that my hamstring doesn't bother me much and sems to be healing finally. I am not pushing it at all, but I can get around now out and at home w/o the leg wrap.

Other than that, I have a couple dozen geraniums, parsley and other plants on my patio and and every three days takes awhile to water and repair damage the damned squirrel here does in digging up the soil early in the morning!

I think one of my feelings now is in emerging from sort of hibernation the last year or so due to my wife's situation, which I allowed to affect me. I am not blaming her - it is that I allowed myself to get protective of myself as well as lazy and disengaged.

*** Had an interruption and so was on hold here while online, but I received a callback from a really good friend from my last job who was my supervisor for five years. We had been playing phone tag last several months, but it was so good to hear from him and we have been able to finally have a long conversation to catch up. Wow. This has been a day! I told him I had felt kind of down that he hadn't responded to my calls and he told me he felt down in being too busy to respond and that he had responded and then I realzed I may have deleted his phone contacts because he had a new phone number and I didn't recognize it. Communication! Jerry told me something that I now realize is true and that is he searched for my name on Link and FB. My wife and I never registered and I have not since she has been in a nursing home, but now I am going to have to. There is too much potentiial out there for renewed contact with good people - mainly past friends- to ignore this nay longer even at my old age...*s* We are now planning to get together with a couple of other guys from when we all worked together and felt close for a pizza night and even families getting together.

Anyway, that is it for now, Take care NG and St. Marital, until next time.

Tom

Thanks for the update, Tom!

Well, it sounds like you'll have to get with the 'connected generation' and get on Facebook. I have a personal annoyance about Facebook and cancelled my account. I've managed to navigate life without it - imagine that!

Love the plants - I wish I had your green thumb.

Stay well, Tom!

Hello Marital, et, al.,

What can I say. Yea, I guess I am going into the current century in terms of communication. I am aware of complaints regarding security breaches and misuse etc., Believe me I know how to be careful, and am investigating it to network now and nothing else. I talked to Char tonight and told her. She didn't have any reservations and mainly because she isn't that computer or internet experienced, but they have conputers there at her home and she said she'd like to try this form of communication for us - i.e messaging. I just look at it as a tool to be in contact. I am not being critical Marital - just feeling this is something I have to do now to network more now.


Just winding down now for the night. Little apprehensive about tomorow and doing well because Catholic Charities is a solid organization and they emphasise teamwork and direct client contact. But in the email I received today the coordinator said welcome to our team. I just want to do well. Ya know what tho, I am relaxing now and teasing the cats, and they are kind of wild now since I brought out the bug! It is basically a toy mouse for cats and I just tied a couple of different colored yarns around it and attached it to a long black thread. It looks like a large beetle or spider crawling across the floor or chairs when I throw it out and reel it in and they are wild. Both of them leapt in the air about five feet a little while ago trying to attack it. Yea I know I'm a terrible tease as Char tells me but when I hear them bouncing off the walls and running up and down hallways to get that 'beetle' it just makes me laugh hard and it's just damn good for them. This maybe seems simplistic but I laugh so hard and they seem so entertained that this is a pleasure.

Tom

First day yesterday at CC was enlightening. Spent about three hours there in training and orientation mainly in the part of the food bank that serves AIDS/HIV clients. They want me there now on Wednesdays when most of these clients come for their weekly food supplies.

I was totally and favorably impressed with how they operate to serve hundreds of clients each week. It's alot more complicated and well-oiled than I ever thought. Had a chance to talk with the volunteer coordinator just before I left and it sounds like they will want me for other things as well as this progresses. One of the projects is the Christmas Toys program which begins right after Labor Day. It's run by a deacon in my parish - not the one I interviewed with - who was the former volunteer coordinator.

I've done some volunteering before, but it's been very local like leading a confirmation class which included our son at my old parish, coaching and school board stuff, but this stuff here that I'm encountering now is really different and challenging. It's challenging to me because you're not just working within your local church or community but with programs that serve a larger area of the county I live in. And, the opportunity to meet new people, not only the staffs at the library and CC, etc. but people who are really in serious need just is envigorating. Just makes me feel that I am a very small member of a much much larger community.

Tom

Very cool, Tom.

Your post resonates with the grace you will bring to these ministries. I envy you your willingness and ability to set service to others so highly in your daily priorities.

Do good work, my friend.

Concurrent events and initiatives never cease to amaze me!

I was thinking about you, Tom, and your new charitable ministry, because the candidate from our parish was ordained into the Diaconate last Saturday. I was unable to attend the ceremony, but am told it was very moving.

And then, and then.....

I read this from you today in another thread:

Only thing is I feel that NG is really going to be pissed that he hasn't yet been nominated for sainthood here yet. He is a good person really, but he has to go thru some additional procedures, so please treat him gently while he is under consideration.

I would point out two things for your consideration, my friend.

1) I THINK to be considered for sainthood, the candidate must be, among other things, certifiably deceased. (St. Marital might be the rare exception, like Mother Teresa, or Lev Tolstoy, in being declared a "living saint".) I would HOPE that if I am ever to be so honored, the designation would be long in the future!

2) And as for those "additional procedures", let's not get too graphic, but if they were to be formulated by SOME of the folks here (lay and Mods), I think I would respectfully decline the process altogether!

Anyway, I hope you are doing well!
St. NG???

I'd switch sides, no question!

Hi NG, I haven;t had a chance to look at my own thread here in awhile and I was going to post and saw your's. The sainthood thing is in kidding - think you realize that and it's fun to kid around, but seriously you are the most inspirational member here that I have encountered in terms of pro-marriage ba none. (Except maybe for Ms Bliss).

Am doing well NG and hope you are too. Having to get around w/o my bike and tough. Brought it in for repair today. Is hot here now, which is not a happy sitch as I have to go in to CC tomorrow and Fri. 101 tomorrow and looks like 90's thru early next week. The head of the food bank wants me to take charge as much as a volunteer can and I like that. Still very much learning tho.

I cannot go down to see Char early in July as I planned and tried to explain that to her last night. She is pissed and gave me an earful. I tried to explain to her again that this is important to me now at this stage of my life - it doesn't override her - but that initially now I am just becoming worn down and will take a break in August to visit her.

Have to break - my son just called and is coming over to get me to the store to pick up some heavy stuff - large cat liter bag and other stuff. Will end this segement with NG, have you looked into CC or other areas where you coult offer your skills?

Take care of you.....Tom

Sorry for having to break away - my son took me for groceries. Now just going to relax tonight. Have been getting tired more easily the last month so now am going to push this engine more - increase exercise reps, more protein, and more relax time. I think is due to having to walk so much.


The Catholic Charities NG is an amazing collection of dedicated people. Unfortunately they like many other agencies don't have enough resources lately to deal with all the needs - so it means parceling or extending the time for client revisits.

Tom

Tom, that's a very sweet thing to say, thank you! I just want our posters to remain in a happy marriage. Sometimes that takes a little work and encouragement.

NG, that guy He's a good poster. Very good, although sometimes he gets a little...oh, how to say this...strident. (I think he does it to tick off the mods, but that's just me. Yes, NG, I'm talking about you!

Tom, Char will have to accept your terms for seeing her. She knows that. She just doesn't like it.

Take flowers to her when you go to see her.

Hello NG,

Not exactly an update here - just responding here to your inquiry after my recent post on your story. Now have been at the Catholic Charities food pantry for about three months. Have met and worked with some good people including the manager of the pantry there. It's 'grunt' work NG - keeping the shelves stocked, unloading deliveries, etc. I also tho provide food to HIV clients from a special section of the pantry, so I do get to know some of the clients who are cared for there. Despite the 'grunt' stuff I like what I am doing and they seem to be happy. Am there two days a week and when I get home well I am pretty much depleted in a good way. I am just amazed NG how little time the food lasts. I can pretty much stock a shelf and next time I come in there are alot of holes to be restocked.

Well the road to any ministry is slow - just a grunt now - but usually takes at least a couple of years to demonstrate any veracity of a vocation. I did sign up to work on a Christmas gifts program, which begins this month. The person who heads up this program is the deacon at our parish who I met and talked with back last spring. I also still volunteer at our local library often, have contract accounting work, ride my bide almost daily, and will be getting back to my exercises this weekend - sort of abondoned them a week ago. My son came to stay with me for awhile now - he lost his bus driving job in the summer. He's down and not feeling that good about it, so I have to get used to making good meals and not letting his situation affect me. Fortunately, I have always liked preparing good meals, remember the things my mom did when prepearing meals, and have some good recipes from the internet.

I hope you are well NG, and you need to stay here, because despite any reaction, you basically tell it like it is and you cannot do more than that.

Tom