Hello, I am new at this and not sure on how to approch this.I don't know what to do.So your advice would be very helpful right about now.I married my husband on October 12th 2001 and we are expecting our first child (she is late and does not want to come out)three days later I learned that he was on the date line(internet dating service)he was stupid enough to down load a photo of himself with my cat!At first he said he was on there long ago.But then I pointed out my cat.Then my friend called me a bout two weeks later and said that I needed to hear this.She put the phone on three way(a phone date line)and put in her info and I will be dammed if my husband was not on it.I almost left that night.He promised me that he just did this for fun and that everyone on there is on it for the same reasons.Never expecting to meet,it's just a game.I told him that if he did not stop that I would leave.He promised me that he would.I found out recently that he still has several ads running both on the internet and the phone date lines.He keeps current on them.He has been talking to many women.He gave a few our home phone and address.So I have spoken to at least four and two came to the door.He said he was drunk and foregot that he was married.He also said that he was never on those lines and that he never gave out any info.Long story short.I was supposed to go to home( N.Z.)but changed my plans becuse I did not want my child born on the flight.He had already made plans to with with three of them.O ne was suppossed to get a tour of the house(an old girlfriend)the other is a 16 year old who was suppossed to spend three days here and the last one at a hotel.Fur flew and once again I almost walked out the door.He stoped me by saying that it was just a game and that he never intended to see any of them.Now he is still emailing the 16 year old and she now stays next door to us with her Aunt.The one he was suppossed to meet at the hotel is also emailing and calling on the phone.Had the nerve to confront me and tell me that I need to stay out of his personal life.And that she thinks I am carring someone elses child.I went through his email and found out the he has been saving all of the letters that they write him ,sometimes they include his letters to them.And he has a girlfriend in Russia that thinks she is coming here to move in and be his wife.He tells them all that he is single and looking for Mrs. Right.Then he tells me that I am Mrs. Right and that he is happy and it is all just a game.That he is not cheating.I don't know what to do.I can't leave right now.All of my family is overseas.And as for friends ,we have the same ones.I don't want to tell them,or put them in a possition to take sides.He wants to work things out,but I am not sure that I can ever trust him. Thank you bunzikitty@hotmail.com Deidre D.

Deidre,<p>EEEEEKKK! What is wrong with this guy??? I think you need to push him toward individual/marriage counseling immediately if there is any chance to save this marriage. There is something desperately wrong here.<p>By the way, in America a 16 yr old girlfriend can mean a long, paid vacation in the State Penitentiary---is he that dense? <p>I'm sorry for your misery. I just think there is some big problem in his head and he needs professional help. This is not a GAME--at least not any game a sane, married person would play.

See www.health24.co.za and click on cybershrink<p>He answers your questions sufficiently and quickly<p>Carol

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by diddallas:
<strong>Deidre,<p>EEEEEKKK! What is wrong with this guy??? I think you need to push him toward individual/marriage counseling immediately if there is any chance to save this marriage. There is something desperately wrong here.<p>By the way, in America a 16 yr old girlfriend can mean a long, paid vacation in the State Penitentiary---is he that dense? <p>I'm sorry for your misery. I just think there is some big problem in his head and he needs professional help. This is not a GAME--at least not any game a sane, married person would play.</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Thank you for your words.They mean alot.I have decided to leave him.I had found out by going through his email that he proposed marrage to a girl in Russia.She has already called the house for him 2 times,He says that he just tells them what they all want to hear and that everyone does this.He told her that I have cancer and that I don't have long to live and with the money that he collects after my death he can retire and take her any where that she wishes to go.It is true that I have cancer,I put off the treament for my baby.I also found out that he uped the insuance on me.So with all this in mind I feel it best to leave.The doctor said that my baby will be born in the next couple of days.I have made arrangments for a friend to care for my child untill I get settaled down.I have not a clue as to where I will go or what I will do.But I do know that I want to be safe and with my child.I am sorry but I can't live like this.If you wish you may contact me through bunzikitty@hotmail.com or bunzikitty@yahoo.com Thank you and God bless you always Deidre Deaver