Since iPhone iMessages are sent using data and do not regular (SMS) text messages, they are not traceable in the same way that SMS messages are (see the thread title "Verizon Text Messages" for one example.).

But it appears that you could use an additional apple device and use your spouse's appleID for the text messages, to view the incoming and possibly outgoing imessages.

Does anyone have any experience with this?

FYI: I saw people trying to avoid this from happening in an apple community discussion titled "same text messages appearing on multiple devices."

here is the link but I am guessing it will get deleted:
https://discussions.apple.com/message/19798299#19798299

Yes, if you have the Apple ID and password then you could view all iMessages on another device. I think it sends a notification that their account was activated on a new device. I would only do it if you could intercept that message.

For example, I can activate my phone number on my iPad Message app. I only get iMessages on it though, not SMS text messages.

Has anyone used this site to recover deleted text messages on an IPhone 4?

http://www.any-data-recovery.com/product/iphone-data-recovery-mac.html

Check it out.

They also have a version for Android and also, to unlock passwords, but i think to only reset it to a new one, so another party would be aware.

LTL