Your situation is not going to get better until YOU start enforcing some boundaries. Your lack of a real response is only emboldening her. She will continue to do this for as long as you continue to be her doormat. Women don't love men they don't respect and they don't respect weak men, and thats what you are being right now.

You allowed your daughter to be used against in a form of emotional blackmail. You should have clearly told her that her mother is betraying you and her, by bringing another man into the marriage. That there is no marriage to save while she runs around with OM.

Its been what, 1 day, and your wife has already violated NC multiple times and is back to chatting with him online? Oh she was going to forward that to you as well? Will she give you the videotape of them sleeping together? I'm sorry to be crass and harsh, but you have GOT to put your foot down! Don't ask her to go NC for 5 months. Tell her that she is DONE talking to him if she wants to stay with you. Cancel her phone, shut off the internet connection, whatever it takes. But most of all, expose (or re-expose) the affair to everyone you can, and speak to your daughter about why what mommy is doing is wrong, and that it is WW who is tearing your family apart, not you. And then be strong.

Your situation is not going to change until you change what you will put up with.

ex-WW had 2 PAs in first 2 years. Buh-bye.
Divorce finalized: 1/28/09
Now just living and loving again.