Well, I hadn't been to this site, so I didn't realize that my wife's greatest need was conversation, and that she needed to have it to feel complete. Don't get me wrong, we talked all the time, but probably not about the right things.
So last month when a friend of mine who worked in Seattle offered to have lunch with her since she'd be there for a conference, I thought it was a really nice gesture, and didn't think anything of it whatsoever. But that was the start. They talked at lunch for an hour, and it really filled her "Love Bank". They continued to talk in the days after that.
Sorry you joined the "Club". The above quote you said you talked all of the time. Then you said your friend and your wife had lunch for an hour. So can you tell me what he said to her in 1 hour that met her needs that made her want to have sex with him? And made her want to start sending naked pics to him? Are you sure this is her first affair?
I mean how do you go from being in a good marriage and then in an hour meeting she is a teenager that can't wait to go bump boots with her new boyfriend. What I am saying is you need to get to the bottom of this. From your description you were a decent husband and a 1 hour meeting turns her into this?
Did they know each other before this? Were these feelings from lust she had from the guy before. It just seems odd that a short lunch would do that although I am sure the pig was hitting on her from the get go and she was loving it. Are you really sure this is her only affair??
On another note this just shows how stupid people are in affairs. I have spent a lot of time with any teenage girl relatives telling them to "NEVER AND I MEAN NEVER"
send a naked picture to a guy. The whole world can see it. And it happened to one of my niece's. She sent one anyway. I thought teenagers in love do the dumbest things but when a married woman sends one to her "Boyfriend" well you just have to shake your head.
Again, I feel for you. My XW did some real stupid things and I have to give you credit for sticking around for her. That is something that I would not do. Best of luck in your healing.