I wrote to Dr Harley a couple of years ago about my DD, when she was about 18. She had failed her first semester of college and I just felt she was immature, making bad decisions, acting entitled, etc.

He basically told me that he tells parents of late adolescent girls to close your eyes and wait for the time to pass. He said most of these girls will mature into great women even when it doesn't seem that way. He told me to let her learn from her own mistakes, that my advice would be ignored and would cause resentment.

He was SO right.

That was about three years ago. At the time I wrote to him, I didn't realize how much I was driving her away by trying to tell her what to do. I basically try to be her cheerleader in life and avoid DJ's. Our relationship is very strong now, she talks to me about EVERYTHING and she is doing well. She has matured a lot on her own. I'm sure she will still make a lot of mistakes but that's part of what life is about...