Oh True sorry...here's the article (I only think it's a portion and the post didn't say where this was from or if there was more). It explains how WS's think "it's love" and like 2 said, it's not love, love it's lusting for something "sinful":

ROMANTIC INFIDELITY

Surely the craziest and most destructive form of infidelity is the temporary insanity of falling in love. You do this, not when you meet somebody wonderful (wonderful people don't screw around with married people) but when you are going through a crisis in your own life, can't continuing living your life, and aren't quite ready for suicide yet. An affair with someone grossly inappropriate-someone decades younger or older, someone dependent or dominating, someone with problems even bigger than your own-is so crazily stimulating that it's like a drug that can lift you out of your depression and enable you to feel things again. Of course, between moments of ecstasy, you are more depressed, increasingly alone and alienated in your fife, and increasingly hooked on the affair partner. Ideal romance partners are damsels or "dumsels" in distress, people without a life but with a lot of problems, people with bad reality testing and little concern with understanding reality better.

Romantic affairs lead to a great many divorces, suicides, homicides, heart attacks, and strokes, but not to very many successful remarriages. No matter how many sacrifices you make to keep the love alive, no matter how many sacrifices your family and children make for this crazy relationship, it will gradually burn itself out when there is nothing more to sacrifice to it. Then you must face not only the wreckage of several lives, but the original depression from which the affair was an insane flight into escape.

People are most likely to get into these romantic affairs at the turning points of life: when their parents die or their children grow up; when they suffer health crises or are under pressure to give up an addiction; when they achieve an unexpected level of job success or job failure; or when their first child is born-any situation in which they must face a lot of reality and grow up. The better the marriage, the saner and more sensible the spouse, the more alienated the romantic is likely to feel. Romantic affairs happen in good marriages even more often than in bad ones.

Both genders seem equally capable of falling into the temporary insanity of romantic affairs, though women are more likely to reframe anything they do as having been done for love. Women in love are far more aware of what they are doing and what the dangers might be. Men in love can be extraordinarily incautious and wining to give up every-thing. Men in love lose their heads-at least for a while.

Oh and my H gave me another "piece" of my puzzle last night that I had thought awhile back.

I don't know what started the conversation, but I blurted out to him if he was ever afraid of the OW in someway as he wanted and still wants me to get my concealed weapon's license...(I took the class right around the time I found out about the A). He told me he felt she was psycho because she would call and say to him "but I thought we were friends?" after he stopped returning her calls. He says her "voice" put him ill at ease. Great...just what I really wanted to hear. He says he is still afraid she'll call him even after his NC letter and no returned phone calls after almost 8 months.

So now I feel soooo much better, not!

Did you hear about the guy who pleaded "temporary insanity" at his divorce trial? He said he was "crazy" about the OW. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />Typical male according to Holiday's article.

Hey all, I'm back and it is pouring down rain here in sunny Fla. Good thing I have broadband cable and no front porch swing. Right, True? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> [color:"blue"] [/color]

Anybody online???

I'm here, but going out to lay by the pool.
Hot and sunny here in Vegas land!

I am back from my trip in town:)

Whao, did I ever strike it lucky! Two of ya back on the radar screen. HA.

Holiday, don't get burned. At your age YCEUITCW!

True, whadup?

Nothing much.

Had a "fight" with the H after I posted last time. Not in the best mood.

You sound perky... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

True <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

you wanna share why you were fighting? who won the fight? (Duh, you're a tough ! I know who won!)

[color:"brown"]Well, my H decided not to read here anymore when I wanted to have a private conversation with DogMom...he just said I needed my privacy. Well, I said, he was blowing things out of proportion or something, b/c I like him reading and sharing with me...but what it really boils down to is that I am still hurting over last night. Then he tells me that he is going to lunch with the people at work...and I just felt like when I am upset, he should be with me...I know, that is selfish and unreasonable...but that is how I feel.

Then while I was in town we ran into him and the folks from work. He was all bubbly and said hi and playing all nice, and I just wanted to kick him in the shins...again, selfish and juvenile, but me....I just felt like he was putting on a show for his employees and not b/c he really wanted to say hi.

I know...throw me those 2x4s..I need them I am sure. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

True <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> [/color]

Whack! Whack! Bad . Now go sit in the corner of the cornfield in time out.

be back in a minute. hold on...

I'm back. Sorry.

No Problem...I am still just sitting here...yes..now on the porch..it is not raining:)

send your email address to my new one...

retiredchippendaledancer@yahoo.com

I know, it sounds corny, but they make me use it after all those years.

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

Is that really an email address??? Seriously???

You are silly!

True

try it and see

[color:"blue"] I need to go pick up my daughter's friend for a slumber party...woo hoo.
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

I will be back...maybe <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> If I do not get to chat with you guys later..have a SUPER DUPER weekend...I will try to do the same. Thanks for being such a good circle of friends!!!

True <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> [/color]

Slumber Party? I wasn't invited!! Drats. ha.

Cya

Okay True...now you are getting to well, what would be the correct word, picky? He wouldn't say anything to you if he didn't want to. He's been working hard on this with you, why do you wish to backslide here. Keep moving forward.

I know we are all not perfect and can put on a smiley little perfect face especially what's happened to us, but shouldn't we at least be somewhat proud of any effort at this point put on by our spouses?

Keep that communication open and honest with your H. And try not to put his face in the dirt when you don't get exactly what you need, exactly when you need it. You and your H sound so great together.

I'm feeling hormonal right now and that starts my little downward spiral of depression. That's when my family suffers (and I am only a little PMSy unlike my girlfriends).
I start to feel nobody loves me, everybody hates me...I think I'll eat a worm (hope someone remembers this song).

This may sound way too submissive here, but how about you and the kids making Daddy a special dinner tonight? Candles and all!

OK, you guys will be proud of me (I think). I told you I'm leaving this weekend and my H is working tonight, so my dad is baby-sitting the kids till my H gets home. I ran to the grocery, to make sure the house has food while I'm away and as I was leaving they had these beautiful roses at the flower stand. So I (with kids in tow), went back in line and bought it. I am going to leave it on his pillow (so hopefully the kids won't get to it) along with a note. Now tell me I'm not good?!

You see, this was the kind of things I did before...notes in his suitcase when he left town, buy his favorite candy bar and leave it with a note in his car. Yes, I did all this during his A. Never minded the fact that it was rarely returned. I've been very gun shy about doing this again, but here is my first attempt. Are you all proud of me?
2

Hip Hip Hooray! I AM so proud of you 2!

And jealous!

Somebody give my W these suggestions.

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />