Congrats my red-hatted friend! Damn boy you move fast! Iam proud you found somebody of equal mind...and spirit. You rock!

I am into day 9 of NC...I rock! Am off to go to mystic tans in a bit.

I swear...this whole deal bout my xbf is doing nothing but making me madder and madder. But the whole pain thing is easing off. Thank my stars for a dating B! It works well! I am refocused and doing good. Am going to have a bubble bath first before mystic tanning...2 more days until my son comes home and 1 more weekend before my week on call (week beginning june 1).

Now I am more inclinded to believe my xbf/psudo bf of last 3 mos., is definitely passive aggressive. And that makes me MAD! How dare he just not call? I did nothing to deserve that. I was kind, sweet, and always supportive of him and his work. He was to me in turn except...

and this may be the caveat here...

when he found out that the M.S. practicioner program for my med. specialty was being approved by state board of regents and that I was applying for it...and that as my having been state prez, I pushed for it to go thru for 2 years...long before I even knew him. Yes, having practicioners in our field will make some p.a. positions obsolete if they work in our specialty...and he does work within my specialty. maybe he is getting all passive-aggressive about that?

If that threatens his manlihood, then he is not much of a man to begin with. What mad would NOT love a strong, loving, attractive, supportive, and intelligent woman trying to become the best girl she can be? Heck I know that threatens the heck outta my xh. Most millenium men do not find this to be an issue however...Unless you are a throwback to the days of the neanderthal.

I am beginning to think this may have something to do with it.

My best friend, T., thinks that he still has been getting it on with somebody he just met trying to figure himself out and his hormones out. I do not know.

He just does NOT fit the Atlanta Male Housebuyer Type! Not at all. Hence the girlfriend-under-the-rug scenario of my best friend.

Now I just think about it, get MAD, then go and do something else. It is getting better. My best friend, T, says I should just go back to doing what I did during my separation days and wear a rubber band. When I think about him, I give it a pull and wham! Pain is associated with thinking of him...

And judging from my recovery from my former marriage, I'd say the rubber band method of negative association works like a charm!

Ok...

What in the heck do men want these days?

Am I to come home from a grueling day at the hospital and put on my fitted waist dress and heels and morph instantly into a stepford wife? What and who am I supposed to be? Sure, I was Queen of the Stepfords once upon a time ago...But that was then. Now I am more like Grey's Anatomy than Martha Stewart Living. And I like being who I am now...it was the woman I was years ago...when I first met Darth.

What do men want? I know about EN's. I know about LB's. I know how to fill up a LBank. I am not that unattractive either...lol..and my artichoke dip and my creme brulee and spikey heels can compete with the staunchest Stepford ever...so what is the darn deal?

Why can't I feel something either? I don't get this one. Ok...it's a vent now.

Except for the p/a P.A., I haven't "felt" anything. He was first guy I felt deeply towards after the big D. Why can't I just want to be more open to a guy? I have dumped quite a few since say october of last year. Why have I closed myself off to all but one guy? I know it is wrong.

I want to move on...and yes, it is time for me to move on. I am moving on.

It is just these nagging questions which fill my wittle bwain during my morning jogs.

I was trying and waited for 2.5 years ... finally I found her. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Yeah, we move so fast that we have almost nothing to know anymore about each other but enjoying it. I have not bring her around my 2 D, I am going to do that next week.

Peachy, that is dating all about. If he plays game ... well, I don't think you should waste any time on him. I am sure you will find the one that would love and cherish you no matter where you are at.

Depend who the man is ... LOL!.

You should avoid being a serial dater ... try one until won't work then look for another one ... that is not working. Date as much men as you can then start weeding 'em out until you get a finalist <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />.

-rh-

Your description of your relationship is hard to make sense of, why would one choose such a parnter? Perhaps this link might shed some light on why women (and men) choose such people. The site seems to have been put up by a woman who had relationship experiences similar to yours, and wanted to figure out why they never worked right.



http://www.cassiopaea.com/cassiopaea/psychopath.htm

ok...checked that link and???

I was a psych minor btw...

My xbf is not that description. Not at all. And I am not like that...not at all...He may be committment phobic, and maybe passive aggressive, but he is not those things...

Now my xh is a sociopath who has no feelings and has no understanding of how he did those things...but nobody knows he's one until they get close to him..took me several years to find out.

As for me, I am a newly empowered single woman who is ready to have fun and get on with life and figure out the answers to some questions that have been nagging her. They are pretty simple questions..the house issue...the not speaking issue.....basically.

Redhat that is awesome dude! Glad you didn't yet into her to the girls. I only let R see my son once and it was at a park where he was rollerblading, I was running, and my son was on his bike. Maybe for an hour last summer.

Redhat, I've decided after a very nice phone call I got today to go out with C...the doc I met at work...he's very nice and we talked all about his weekend on call and his family, etc...very up front guy. So how's that for moving on a little bit? I am still bummed a bit over R...it still doesn't make sense. Red what's your take on it? The two questions I have. You can directly email me if you wish...or post it here. when I am at work, I do not get onto MB.

Go and have an open mind about C. You have to check him out and see what he has to offer you. I know you have no problem attracting men ... you just have to give 'em a chance and run when you see red flags.

Don't beat yourself up about what he means and/or wants ... time will tell. Or when you are stronger ... call him up and ask him. Just make it safe and tell him you just want to hear his side of the story.

Again have fun while you are looking ... if it is too much game then you have to drop him. I have to drop 2 of my serious dates before I finally found my angel. With her, it is soo easy and naturall ... we have nothing to hide and we so sure about each other, and we hold nothing back from each other. Couldn't you tell that I am in 7th heaven ? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

-rh-

Red hat...or should you change your id to REDHOT for your sweetie you met? I think that'd be cute <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Talked 2x to xbf...and I haven't yet gotten around to the whole "why in the heck did you act like this jerk?" thing yet...b/c we keep getting interrupted...like his having somebody with chest pains in er and with me having to finish up a patient (our call is via cell)...so until he really says something when he calls...NC for me!

Red done some thingking man...Your ideas made me think hmmmm...
I decided to quit trying completely with R the pa-pa. He asked what was new...I said that I got a mini ipod...an that was cool...he asked if I had downloaded some "velvet revolver"...since he'd gotten miffed that since I didn't speak to him I must have taken somebody else to it. I said, yea, am gonna download that after outkast and audioslave.

was very nice when we talked but I swear, we both couldn't talk for more than five min b/c we both were at work.

Now on the other hand, the new guy is nice...am starting out waaaaay slow. He called during work yesterday but it was hairy day...and asked me to go to braves' game. I couldn't get a babysitter, so it's gonna have to wait until next week..C is at amelia island right now...he's giving a lecture there in fact! He's very sweet and nice thus far.

Can we say it would be easy for a girl to fall for a guy who speaks fluent spanish and french?

Am spending holiday weekend w/my son. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> he's so great. We are gonna go see madagascar tomorrow night after spending all day in pool and in the yard. I am re designing my backyard which is now a puppy paradise. Am reclaiming my green space!

Easier said than done though.

I sure wish I'd figure this dating thing out. Rather than jump in, I am taking things super slow with C.