2 nights ago got an IM from OW/W to my now, xh...she worked soooooo hard to reel in my xh...and married him after he got her preggers. Now since immediately shacking up w/him and then getting preggers deliberately (second time she's done this w/a guy), seems life is not so good in the honeymoon nest.

So if your WS marries the OP you can maybe expect some of this crud.

It's this simple. The WS carries lots of unresolved issues if they instantly remarry the OP. They will someday also resent the OP for lots of things...such as breaking up a family, or as I figure in this case...marrying out of obligation and not outta a forever kinda love. Out of a "crotch" kinda of love.

I get an IM from her...I figure she's gonna tell me off about something or say something stupid...she's always trying to engage me in either small talk or a convo btw...and in case you wonder HOW DOES PEACHY DEAL WITH OW/W? I DO NOT...SHE IS INVISIBLE TO ME. AT games, at any social event where my xh brings her, I do not engage on any level. I only engage my xh when it is about son. Other than that, I am openly contented to just be w/my son and be there for him. Guess I've developed what I call "ENDLESS PLAN B TUNNEL VISION"...which is great if you have to get to this point.

She informs me that "I think I AM DYING!" And she begins to go on for almost an hour via IM about her symptoms...which include sleeplessness, loss of appetite, heart racing, extreme exhaustion (I can't even climb the stairs w/o getting out of breath), and more...she is 26 years old and skinny as a rail...I asked her "have you ever been dx w/anemia (thinking she's anorexic or something)." She says yea, but earlier on and not now.

She begins to say she thinks its' her heart...and how her mom had heart problems. I tell her how my dad died of heart issues five years ago. I go on to tell her I will refer her to a very nice female cardiologist and give her the number. Then I tell her the kicker...I say that "SOME PEOPLE CAN ALSO BRING EXTREME STRESS INTO YOUR LIFE".

She says then without provocation that my XH, DARTH, DOES NTO UNDERSTAND HOW SHE FEELS AND THAT HE IS SOMETIMES JUST UNAWARE ABOUT ALOT OF THINGS...or is uncaring but she alluded to that. I told her how DURING MY DIVORCE, AS SHE WAS WELL AWARE OF, THAT MY bp rose once well into stroke range and that I was placed in more stress in my life than my body at the time could handle. I told her that life can cause stress which can mimic other health problems.

I did not respond that much, but did wish her well and told her that the doc was very nice and to tell her everything she was feeling...

Honestly, she's suffering from imho...DEPRESSION!

And why? Well I already know he's cheating on her...has been for a year from what I have been told by those in my old hometown and by some of his partners at work.

I think she IM'd me to get some "fishing" stuff done to see if I'd say something...or to verify how she felt.

I mean, C'mon...why on earth would somebody who cussed me out up and down last fall at my sons' birthday party accusing me of trying to get MY XH back would do this? Easy...she knows I might be only person who would understand what she is enduring...

And it's b/c she's likely experiencing the leftovers from the disentegration of MY MARRIAGE...she's feeling the fallout...

She's not going to live up to darth's lofty expectations past the "maxxim" girl part...and it's showing.

Their M imho, has ended the honeymoon period. REAL LIFE HAS COME INTO PLAY AND THE FANTASY IS NOW DEAD.

But do I want this back? Hell no.

I want my life now.

So if you worry if your WS marries the OP, then think again. They'll be getting nothing but the WORST kind of leftovers...and it always tastes worse when reheated...unlike good spaghetti...

So sleep well...Know if they jump into the frying pan after the fire, that YOU WILL BE THE ONLY PARTY TRULY FREE. And it feels good! Unlike how the WS feels when they marry the OP and that freedom is instantly zapped!

Oh Peachy, good to see you posting. Seems as 'Jethro' still hasn't learned has he?!??!? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

IMHO, Ms. Jethro wanted free medical advice. You'd best send a bill for your services. What a nutcase..... she probably thinks that because of your profession you can fix her 'broken heart'. Ooops is that her heart or her enlarged boobies?!??!? LOL!!!

In reality, she deserves the stress she is living. After all isn't chaos what she created to get him? Welp, she has him now and since he loves drama, she gets to have an OW in her life too!

Please don't communicate too much with her. Who knows, she might want to dump her kids on your doorstep or make you their godmother in case something happens to her. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

take care,
L.

Peachy,
I have followed your story for a very long time, and I can only say... good grief!
I am glad you are out of the whole Jethro drama, and make sure you keep away from it. Those two made their way into this mess that is bound to get worse day by day.

Let this be a cautionary tale for those OW that think they are "special" and that their "love" will last forever and feel like they have won a prize. Sad how some people can delude themselves into the worst mistakes of their life.

Hi peachy,

I have also followed your story though I don't recall ever posting to you before.

My question is: why did you let this homewrecking OW go on for an HOUR IM'img with you if she is "invisible"? I would have just shut my computer down.But in reality,the OW will never contact me.She wouldn't dare.

For heavens sake though: don't be her sounding board now that she is getting a taste of what it's like being married to Mr.Unfaithful.Let her cry on some other man's shoulder.PUKE.

Glad to hear you are doing well otherwise.

O

My policy exactly. They've stood directly in front of me, like three feet away, trying to get my recognition, and I see "through" them. He's so used to enabling he can't get it through his head that at least one person who used to be in his life holds him accountable.

And, although he's big into information control, I can smell the smoke. Others don't know the signs, and they control the bad stuff in public. Little pieces of flotsam and jetsam (sp.?) are washing onto my shore.

But if she's invisible, why are you trading text messages? Let her pay for her own therapist.

peach - ditto the others.

Why torture yourself with this crap? Make your last communication with her a notice to not contact you again - take her "problems" to her "husband." Plan B them both so they get the full benefit of fullfiling each other's ENs. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Looking back - after you tell her to leave you alone - consider her prior communications with you as the ultimate compliment in a perverse sort of way. She realizes her H cannot meet her needs but you can! Wow, the aliens really did a number on her.

FWIW, if the OM in my sitch EVER attempts to communicate with me he'll be slammed with a restraining order that is cocked and ready to fire - since our last communication was him physically threatening me on my own property.

WAT

Glad you are doing well. I remember the first game you had to go to with OW there. Life is funny. Yep, she has post partum depression IMHO. Life is not so peachy for her now that she has married a cheater. Don't bother with her. IM her to call her OB to discuss PPD. Maybe she can sign up here at MB-bring her ON!!!

Just kidding about the MB thing-send her to SI

SI?

Peachy,

I can completely understand why you stayed through the conversation. In your shoes, I'd have done it too with a big bowl of popcorn and an ironic grin on my face!

The best revenge is living well, and if you can see the other person going down in flames while you're doing it, that's just icing on the cake.

Dobie

cut her off from communicating with you... this can only be annoying like a rash ....

Pep<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Yeap ... if you want someone outta from your life, you have to remove yourself from theirs.

-rh-

Oh the vengeful me just loves hearing a good karma story! There is justice in the world! CV

I want my life now too. Don't have it yet, but I hope to be there by summer's end. I am making progress. What you said really rings true with me.

I used to think in terms of not letting the OW win. I have come to realize that in this situation the only winner is going to be *ME* and that those two losers deserve each other.

I feel ready to break free.

ewon

Yes, it sounds like somebody (OW) got what she deserved!

SI is survivinginfidelity.com