I need some brutal honesty, what is the deal with younger women? My H A was with a women 12yrs younger, he's 42. It's not about the physical shape she's in, myself and most of my girlfriends are in better shape. (OK humble wasn't part of the equation for explanatory reasons)

Why is it so elevating for men to be "seen" with a younger woman? What do you guys says to each other in the locker room that encourages this? It's like the guys don't even care if it's all about their money or whatever, as long as they've got the girl on their arm.

I do understand the obvious if there aren't any children around to complicate things but outside of that what's the deal? I'm not trying to condemn it, just ascertain the thought process behind it. Thank for any input.

What emotional needs can younger women meet more easily? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> This isn't a dig on anyone so please don't flame me. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

It is not all about younger women. A number of BS were younger than the ow. It has nothing to do with looks, age, etc.

It is a fantasy world.

After the fog lifts, many FWS are stunned they were ever attracted to the OP.

I think many times the A partner/s looks/age have nothing to do with it. I think it is more the willingness/openness/availability factor. For my H, his A partners were met online, married but looking types. Two were younger and two were older. He has told me he would only rate them about 5 or 6's and that previously in his single life or just walking down the street were all people he would have never had an attraction too. Okay I'll put humble out of my reply too. Based on what other people say I'm probably overall a pretty strong 9. Don't flame me for that...ha Drex.

It's only "elevating" to insecure men, aka immature men.

Nothing. Real men don't encourage it, because real men recognize how stooooopid older guys look with younger women. We recognize that they're artificially trying to boost their fragile egos.

Again, they have to elevate themselves in their own eyes.

You should condemn it.

In my many years on this rock, I've narrowed it down to three things that get better with age.

Wine, women, and concrete.

JMHO

For my sexual addiction age was never a factor. I was 46 when my addiction was at it's worst and ages of women ranged from 27-51, with the majority of them being closer to my age. I think someone said availability and for me that was probably the key. It would have been anyone who was understanding about where I was in life, the problems I was dealing with, and cared enough to discuss them with me. I think what happens is sometimes a younger woman takes on feeling as though she is talking with someone more mature and responsible and they become to care for their problems. But then that can happen with anyone.

Here's a thought. Nobody flame me either.

Older or Mature women expect more out of a man. and vice versa. If a younger women has lower expectations they are easy to meet.

I am 37 years old man. When I was in my early 20's before I got married what I could afford on a date is different then what I can afford now. My idea of a romantic date was dinner at a chain restaraunt a single rose and some nookie. Now it is a dozen roses a romantic restaraunt and a walk on the beach then hopefully some nookie. Also we don't burp, fart or act like a teenage boy trying to impress his friends. LOL

But again if they don't expect alot from you based on what they are used to getting it is easier to meet their expectations.

Female responding here. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

Aside from the obvious physical aspects, I'd guess that younger females are easier to impress. And knowing a high percentage of males may have that important EN of "Admiration", perhaps that need is easily met by that age group.

Remember, its all about how the OP makes them (WS) feel about themselves.

It's not always younger women...

YES!!! So true...Now, I'm not a man, but I am a FWS and I can tell you, firsthand, that an affair has to do with the issues of the WS...It is NOT about the BS's inability to meet the WSs EN's...It is NOT about the OP...In EVERY way, shape and form an affair is about the WS...WSs almost always "affair down" because they need to see themselves in an elevated state...this is also true of the OP, because if the OP was a completely secure and emotionally healthy individual they would not be having an affair with a married person...Affairs are so much about trying to find happiness outside...people involved in affairs do NOT understand that happiness is comes from the inside them...focusing inward is many times far too painful a thing to do-so very much wrong there...Really and truly, if Barney the Dinosaur had these type issues, and were to come along and pay attention to a would be WS, that would be WS would immediately attach to him and become a full blown WS...To all BSes everywhere, please stop believing that your WS's affair has anything to do with your shortcomings...IT DOES NOT!!! That's their baggage, let them carry it!

Mrs. W

"In my many years on this rock, I've narrowed it down to three things that get better with age.

Wine, women, and concrete."

WAT - You are WONDERFUL!!!!

b/c they are more naive....or stupid? sorry,..but my xh's wistress wifey is STUUUUUUPID. not the sharpest tool in the proverbial shed.

plus it is easier to impress chicks if they are younger (which usually means they are earlier out in their careers ..that is if the ones darth is chasing actually have careers as one's a college student and his present wifey is a former model well sort of).

my xh likes to impress the naive younger less economically viable younger chicks who will lift their gauchos for a handsome older cheese daddy who can buy them clothes and stuff....and can afford to take them somewhere other than destin fl, where they go on their college spring breaks. he also prefers them if possibly, stupid. why? IT MAKES HIM APPEAR BRILLIANT...THUS HERO WORSHIPPING CAN BEGIN!

So far, so enlightening but let me be more clear; I was not alluding to a WS, BS situation, just the relationship between older men, younger women in general.

I get all the stuff about an A being his issues blah, blah...I'm still more curious about the attraction to younger women by men who are in a position to be establighing another relationship ie, divorce, death etc(is there an etc?)

My girlfriends and I can speculate all day but I'd really rather know what goes on in the minds of men.

Please, continue to be blunt, it's anonymous.

I'm not an expert on it at all, and actually, I'm the FWS, not my husband.....

But I can tell you for sure that regarding my husband, he is attracted to models. He is very particular about a girl's looks. In fact, even though I'm a size 2 and in great shape, he used to tell me I was a chubby, even though I was running anywhere from 5 to 9 miles a day. That was a LB for me. But, my husband didn't cheat, I did, so I don't want to dog him.

Funny, but I just had this conversation with someone... I do not date nor am I interested in women more than a few years either side of my age (about 6 years diff. is the most I would consider).
What I have seen... both in the media and in real life these days is older women with younger men. That seems to be the trend these days.
All I can say for myself... is I like a woman... not a girl...I don't want or like fake boobs... a 40 year old woman is not supposed to have breats that could double as shoulder pads. For the men out there that need to have a young woman... hence a trophy by their side... I feel sorry for them. All I ever ask for out of any partner in terms of how she looks is to just take care of herself... eat right most of the time... exercise a bit and your body will be what it will be and I will find that beautiful.
On top of that ... as far as there not being any children to complicate things... again, I feel a woman with children is more attractive to me because I have a child. I wouldn't exclude someone w/o children... but it's a plus if they have some.
Hmmm. did I get a bit long winded here?

I DATED a few younger men between marriages. They were easy to be with. Very little expectations, just fun. They thought I was SOOOO smart (which I KNEW wasnt true, but it still felt good to hear, especially after exH, who with which I could do no right) and they were so easily impressed with the simplest of skills. Huge deposits of Admiration points.

I NEVER expected a real relationship with them, but they were fun for a few months at a time. Nothing worth trashing a marriage, but to someone starving for Admiration, it was nice. Total ego boost to be with some who thinks your 'neat' - Dru

ps: my friends grinned at first, but would have given me h*ll if I had gotten serious with them. This wasnt about impressing my friends, it was about nursing my ego

did he know he was just there to nurse your ego?

My FWH had a whole list of reasons why his A was my fault. Some legitimate but most were weak and silly. My list of his shortcomings would have been much longer and more important, but I didn't even think about having an affair. I just loved him in spite of his faults.
The women he chose were not beauties and not special in any way, just available and willing.

I don't have a lot of time but thought I would respond. I was watching a comedian and he was talking about women upset that men seem attracted to young women.

He made a good observation. He said something to the effect "I will start feeling sorry for women when they stop wanting to screw Sean Connery.

I look at it more as what is wrong with these young women? I mean they could just as easily find a young guy but they get together with these old guys? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/ooo.gif" alt="" /> I could never understand it. My brother married a gal about 17 years younger.

She was good looking. That is important to a lot of men. Physical attractivness can be a big EN for some men. It is kind of like why do women like guys with more money?

There are many reasons but I always kind of laugh when I see a big age difference. A lot of times when you see a woman and a man the same age the guy looks a lot older that the wife due to hair loss or grey and not coloring it. It looks even worse if he gets with a young chick.

As a MC once said to me men wish the had the same girl they married and women want the man they have to change into what they want. Maybe this plays into it and maybe not.

I can't prove this but men are very visual. How would we populate the earth if men did not get turned on by the looks of the female. I am sure women get turned on by seeing a good looking male but I am not sure that the female really understands how a man looks at a really attractive female. I don't think they are equal. Again, if women knew how we looked at them they would never stop slapping us.

This is only my opinion and could be wrong FWIW. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Wasn't there a line in the movie Moonlighting about this? I think the best answer they had was that "some men fear death" or something like that. I've given up trying to figure it out..but I've decided that those that show a preference for younger women will not change with time. Hence my "stalled recovery." Can't get past the fact that WH chose a woman half my (and his) age. Now it's more of a rhetorical question: "What the he!! was he thinking!!??"