How about Washington Irving?

Or is it Irving Washington?

Phillip Roth? John Irving? Mario Puzo? John D. McDonald? Saul Bellow? E.L. Doctorow? Joseph Heller? Anton Meyer?

How about music. Elvis Presley? REM? B-52's? Wide Spread Panic? You may have to ask DS a few of these. Jackson Browne? Bob Dylan? Counting Crows? Sheryl Crow? Allman Brothers Band?

I am always curious which of our exports make it across the various ponds.

LOL Todd, all of them. All the names you mentioned are VERY familiar to me.

American culture is alive and well in this country, in fact it thrives. Visitors here from the US are always very struck by how alike our cultures are with subtle but very important differences.

What are the important differences other than you don't have cows, ergo no steaks?

And what about the AFLAC duck? Do you know who he is?

You've got me there.

LOL we do have cows. Lots and lots and lots of them. NZ is one big dairy farm. The whole country was built on sheep and cows.

Actually, the differences probably aren't that subtle, they're probably huge. But considering my whole experience of American culture is through TV, movies, music, news and meeting Americans, what would I know?

What's the difference between a lamb and a sheep?

Are you familiar with Serta's Counting Sheep?

How about Serta?

Have you heard of Missouri?

New Jersey?

Vermont?

Idaho?

What about Vidalia onions?

Did Polish jokes make their way through NZ, oh, about three decades ago?

They were quite cruel. I had a good friend whose parents immigrated (emmigrated?) from Poland and he and his family were not amused. Well, he made a trip to visit his relatives and when he came back, he was so excited. Apparently, over in Poland, likely as a backlash against Polish jokes, the Poles had developed some pretty clever American jokes.

This was his personal favorite:

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One.

I don't get it.

The original Polish joke was:

How many Poles does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Answer: Six. One to hold the lightbulb and five to spin the ladder.

So....in Poland, the joke about Americans is how many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One.

It's yet another Polish joke diguised as an American joke.

The difference between a lamb and a sheep is about a year. Actually, not true, there are lambs, then two tooths, then hogget, then mutton (or something like that - I don't live in the big dairy farm - I live in the big city).

Yes, I've heard of all those states, no, I haven't heard of Vidalia onions.

We had, and still do have, Australian jokes and the Australians have NZ jokes. All of them are about sheep. Irish jokes and blonde jokes are also very big.

Two blondes walk into a building.

You'd have thought one of them would have seen it.

Vidalia onions grow only within Vidalia, Georgia. They are the sweetest onions in the world. Some people eat them like apples; not me, but some people.

I do know some sheep jokes and at least one involves a NZ man in pink shorts..

Do you know who Ted Turner is?

Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted!

Q: How do blonde brain cells die?
A: Alone.

Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
A: Pregnant.

Q: What do you call 10 blondes at the bottom of a pool?
A: Air Pockets

Q: A blonde is walking down the street with a pig under her arm. She passes a person who asks "Where did you get that?"
A: The pig says, "I won her in a raffle!"

Q: If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first?
A: The brunette - the blonde would have to stop for directions!

The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve.

"Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"

Yes, I do know who Ted Turner is. I also know he was married to Jane Fonda.

Q: What do you call 2 Australians at the bottom of a swimming pool.
A: A start

THEY ARE NOT PINK SHORTS. THEY ARE FADED RED SHORTS. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Funny jokes BTW.

I have one. How many ethnic groups can ToddAC offend in 12 hours?

I was wondering the same. Let's see, you took care of the French and British. And Germans. I the French Canadians and the Poles. And Aussies now. I would say NZ but thus far my comments are limited to the pink shorts. No need to go off on the entire population when you have a poet in pink shorts.

THEY ARE FADED RED SHORTS


<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Bought any more pretty scrapbooking paper yet, Pio?

Jen,

Do Kiwi's sound more Aussie or British?

Todd we sound more like Aussies but not so drawly. Flatter and more nasal. If we sound like anyone, we sound like South Africans.

There are degrees of poshness in our accents. Very few regional differences, but definitely class differences (and we're an egalatarian, classless society. Yeah, right).) Class differences in the grammar we use as well.

I always laugh when I see WAT's "Master Baiter" because I pronounce Master as Mahster and the joke loses quite a bit.

BTW, 2much, where are you? Are you ok?

I don't mind Cat Stevens's music as it happens. It's better than "It's a small small World" Todd.

Be greatful for small mercies.

Ooo, a guy (mostly, kiwi, hi!)conversation! I'm gonna sit back watch, learn & enjoy the fun, if you don't mind.

My son caught some of the blond jokes laughed then said "those aren't very nice.".

I don't have an exact count but I would say that I have added about 400 pages of scrapbook paper to the collection. I have still yet to see one finished page.

I have been very busy going back through all my digital photos recoloring any clothes to acceptable colors. Fortunately I don't own pink shorts.

On the drive yesterday (10 hours) we bought a National Enquirer at a stop. One affair after another. I asked WW what she would do if she was alone some place and ran into someone like Brad Pitt and he took interest in her and invited her to his room for SF, what would she do? She said she didn't know. Good answer. I told her I didn't believe in marriage any more. If people want to have an affair, they should just do it. I was mad. I stopped talking. If she had said one more word, I would have told her I wanted a divorce. I didn't want to have that conversation in front of the kids.

Once again I am happily detached.

BTW, I only claim offending the French. Pointing out that the English or Europeans in general all have very distinct dress styles is not offensive. Have you ever had a 10 hour layover in Schipol and had nothing to do but watch people walk by? I will bet you that I can correctly guess their nationalities about 90% of the time.

Offending the French? Why not. It is wrong to be French. Simply WRONG! Someone should stop it.

I get it. "Small" mercies.