She had to announce it because........

What a hoot!

Now I worry about the 'borders'. Where will they go?

I will celebrate the demise of a marriage that never was. LOL!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Then where will that leave the WS? Hm.... as long as he retains the attitude and title, he will be in MISSERY!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

L.

Yes, but unfortunately missery loves company...he'll try and get AMM to go there with him. Just like Believer's X, he'll come back acting like he just got back from a 3 year vacation.

There is no real joy in seeing what we knew would happen, happen. But it is nice to see that people do get the lesson's they need.

I'd rather get the lessons of a BS though, the lessons of a WS seem so dark and... well so dark.

Your half-hearted bump pretty much says it all, AMM. Doesn't it?

I read that the majority of walkaway spouse's do try to come back, especially if a first marriage and children.

I hope for your sake this one doesn't though. He just sank way too far into the darkness, and the climb is too far up now...better he takes the climb alone, or perishes. It's entirely his choice.

So proud of all you had to endure and came out a million times better........So is your kid.

May God grant your every desires.

I am so in awe of your courage.........i too rather be a BS anyday than a WS.

The next few months should be interesting.

AMM:

Yep.

This is so an example of "life is short".

There isn't sufficient time in a human lifetime 2 make rebuilding THAT M a sensible thing 2 want 2 do.

-ol' 2long

Maybe not so half-hearted, weaver, things are getting interesting.



He hasn't learned anything. I'm the only one who's learned something, from what I can see.



This whole New Age community is in meltdown mode, thanks to a very active blog about it.

OW has taken part in the "vocal opposition" -- in a position directly contrary to XH. This has made their relationship untenable. He either has to resign and join her -- which, frankly, would be the best thing for him, he would go in "perish" mode more quickly and cycle through it -- or break up with her. It would be unacceptable for him to be in a leadership role with, as a sidekick, someone who is completely and vocally antithetical to what he is doing.

He has reacted to the crisis by becoming more rigid and doctrinaire -- but he's dragging an anchor. Her. (After all, he is crippled and can't just go out and get a job.)

On the blog she is being presented as someone with "courage," because she has used her own name (abandoning his, btw). I know her to be aggressive and crazy -- which looks like courage.

The split -- which again, might be reconciled, at least temporarily, but still jeopardizes him -- is being presented as one "on principle." That's easier than saying that the selfishness and immaturity of both led to the breakup.

I guess it grinds me a bit that these creepy people are wrapping themselves in various flags. But there's nothing I can do about it.

Hi AM!!

I've been thinking about ya...

Wondering what you've been up to...

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

You will feel so much better after you have your cultectomy.

with prayers,

Oh gross! Now she's posting on the blog that he's "the best man [she] has ever known" even if they do "separate"!!!!

Could this be the same man as my XH? Could this be the same man who arranged his trysts with her at Winco?

What's going on!?!

They're playing out the sad end of the A on a blog!!!

What are they into? Religion, politics, academia? I live in the middle of the woods, surrounded by lakes, so I am kind of far removed from any "new age" culture. What does that mean anyway?

On a different note - are you looking for work in a location that you really want to live in? Location seems very important to me, especially as I get older. Before I thought it didn't really matter where. Now I know better.

And on another different note - I once read that a woman in her 20's & 30's needs her looks, a woman in her 40's & 50'S needs a good personality, and a woman in her 60's and beyond needs money.

Do you think it's meant to be cumulative? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> I hope so, I'd like to have all three in my 60's and beyond.

Hey wow! It gets worse and worse. From my isolation, little drips and drabs of info creep in to me. I'm sure it's the tip of the iceberg.

The suicidal young lesbian woman with a history of weird behavior -- the woman OW took in to her house during her "Mother Teresa" phase -- complained to a friend that OW was coming on to her. Not subtle stuff -- OW was inviting her to share her bath, or to sleep in the bed when XH was away. All the while she is pretending to be the loyal wifey-poo on a blog.

This is such a monstrous abuse of authority that I was floored for a bit. The young woman, fortunately, escaped without consequences.

Then learned that OW told a friend that XH is now a zombie who spends all day watching hard-core porn and masturbating. So apparently his porn addiction continued to accelerate once he left the house -- just as I predicted.

She also told the friend that XH was "violent" to all his wives. That means her, apparently. (No big-deal stuff happened with me.)

Wow! Can't believe it's unravelling so dramatically!

But here's the good news: after a two-year job search from the boonies, I FIANLLY GOT A GREEEAAAAT JOB! I start in a week-and-a-half. I'm outta here!!!!!!

Congrats AM!!!

By the way, send linkie to the blog to me at mojodiva99@yahoo.com , please?

I need something to guffaw over...

Orchid: Oh that can't mean her....they really weren't married....it was only a pretend wedding since they were only friends, right? I mean hey.....now is the time to play back all their babble. LOL!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />


Orchid: Believe it. I do. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />


Orchid: Now I want to celebrate. YIPPEE!!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Very happy 4 u AM. Will call this weekend for the details. LOL!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Aloha,
L.

Woohoo for you! I hope you make lots of nice friends and get lots of big fat paychecks!

I still don't understand what "new age culture" means or what their authority is, but it sounds like it isn't working. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Can you say implosion? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

He sounds utterly gross, btw.

Do you have any pity for him, AM? I know you feel no joy about his self-destruction, just wonder if you feel pity. It is pretty pitiful.

I'm really struggling with believing that my STBXW's A is going to end. D-Day was only 3 weeks ago, and despite me being an emotional wreck, she is continuing to see the OM. Even though she is losing friends, and family over it. The man is exactly TWICE her age. She is adamant that they are soulmates, and age has nothing to do with it. She defends him, like she's been with him for 25 years. It sickens me, and I don't understand how she can do this, when she knows how much it hurts me.

I guess it just doesn't seem like this will ever end, but the PA has only lasted about 5 weeks, the EA about 6 months.

Elproducto,

You need to read "Surviving an Affair", "His Needs/Her Needs" and get working on your Plan A. I read you already exposed, so now stop talking to her in ways that makes her defend the OM. Stop talking to her about the OM at all.

You rec'd excellent advise on both your threads, now get to working on your Plan A. Learn how to babble back like Orchid as well.

But to answer you question, most affairs will end within two years, and only 2 or 3% will survive longer than 5 years.

Sorry for the thread jack AMM.

Last of the thread jack, thanks for the post weaver, but I'm done trying to MB this. I have NO desire to be with my wife ever again. And I've read SAA, and she took my copy and is reading it now. But I just know that she will hate it, because it speaks the TRUTH, something she can't deal with.

AMM:

Congrats on the job!

Hope it's far from the drama (i.e., that you'll not have 2 hear about the drama anymore!).

-ol' 2long

Oh...they may be out of gas, but they can go a long way on the fumes.

This one looked "over" some time ago. Although the "marriage" (the real one, not the fake one) lasted a little over two years, and the whole A a little over four years altogether (it's in the 2-3 percent, I guess), I noticed they didn't seem enormously happy together.

And everyone was in denial.

And I still need a place to live in Palo Alto or environs.

Craigslist isn't turning up much that has a reasonable rent and will take two cats and a large silly dog.

Hi, I'm also scanning Craigslist to rent near where our son will be attending college. Won't be leaving until Aug though, so it's still too early.
Are you looking under the house share section? Some people are fine with sharing a place with pets.
Please, if you don't mind, I would also love to visit the blog and leave my mark. My email is res6mqo3@verizon.net, if you would kindly send me the link.
Thank you. I would post in such a way that it would not be evident that we are acquainted from anyplace, even internet Boards.