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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986
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Member
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986 |
Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
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“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 122
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 122 |
OK I do feel I can be of some help on this one...
I have dealt with drug issues for a lot of years...
First What kind of drugs ???????
This is the one thing I can tell you for a fact
There is NO way to deal with someone that is on drugs...
It will always be what they want
there family plays NO roll
It is all about getting what they want and what they want to do...
You can chase your tail for years trying to get though to them
Nothing will work
Until they want help them self's
Trying to make them get it is a waist of time...
They have to hit there bottom before that an or will happen...
I know of a very good site where you can get a lot of info on this if you would like it
just let me know...
I wish you luck
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 61
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OP
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 61 |
Thank you princessmeggy. I will go look for it now.
I have been reading through lots of other posts as time allows and learning a lot. Right now, I am reading mimi here's thread called "My Gift To You - Please Listen". I found it through another thread. I'm about halfway through it.
I am interested in her thread because my WH tells me similar things about how he is coming home someday, not to give up on him, etc... It makes no sense to me since all of his actions go to OW. It shows me he is very conflicted in his head. I want actions not just words.
I wish I could do a good Plan B. I just don't know how to with the alcohol and drug problems and lack of family and mutual friends.
Thank you again. Off to find it now.
Me = BW
Dday = 12/1/09
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 61
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OP
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 61 |
Me = BW
Dday = 12/1/09
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 61
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OP
Member
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 61 |
Sunshine - cocaine and prescription pills for drugs and then there is also alcohol. OW is a BIG drinker and also takes prescription pills and has done cocaine with him.
Me = BW
Dday = 12/1/09
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 122
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Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 122 |
You can't do a thing here
I have dealt with this drug use for years with my daughter
There wasn't anything I didn't try to help her
Took me years to learn
I couldn't help
only she could help herself
I have cut her off now for a year
And she still hasn't reached her bottom...
You have to learn how to deal with a drug user
That is why he is with the OW
The Drugs are the most important thing to them
You and family are NOT
You are an after thought at best
The best advice I have for you is to cut your loses and run !!!!!!!
It was very hard for me to cut my daughter off
But I really have to say my life has been so much better
It was a wild ride with her
and she was dragging me down with her.
Please go to this site you will learn much...
supportforfamlyandfriendsofcrackaddicts@yahoogroups.com
It is a great group...
If you have kids the best thing you can do is get the drug user out of there life's !!!!!!
Last edited by sunshine4848; 03/31/10 08:00 AM.
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