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Did you finish your exposures?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Bomb scheduled to go off today. Funny, yesterday and this morning WW and I made love for the first time in two months....it was wonderful....I finally put aside the 'images' of the POSOM and was able to do it (fulyl engage body and mind). It was a supreme effort, I can assure you. WW cried after, and when I asked why, she said, "thats all Ive been looking for...to connect w you that deeply....why couldnt you do that before?"  This AM her entire attitude has changed....much better all around...instead of avoiding me, shes touching me smiling at me....just sent me a series of smiley texts on my phone. Now I feel guilty about exposure. I know you are going to say, "get on with it!" Right? Can you tell me what's happening here?
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Sad, don't feel guilty about saving your marriage! Just expect her to be upset and angry for a couple of days but she will get over it. Tell her you will do what it takes to kill her affair because you love her and are fighting for your marriage. When the fog wears off she will be thanking you for fighting for your marriage.
Now, what is your plan today? To whom are you exposing? What are you going to say?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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This is going to be awkward, but the recipe doesn't change - EXPOSE - and neither does your response - "I did what I had to do to save our marriage."
She is almost assuredly going to accuse you of "betraying" her (based on the most recent activities). Resist the urge to point out that her betrayal is the issue. Eventually, she will come to understand that point, but let her think she discovered it on her own.
Stay strong. Keep the VAR turned on. Do not debate. Do not lose your self-control.
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As NG stated:
Stay strong. Keep the VAR turned on. Do not debate. Do not lose your self-control.
The conventional wisdom says not to believe a thing the wayward says only the actions.
The rewriting of history is the first thing waywards do to justify themselves.
She could be trying to "cuckhold" you to put you off your game, but who knows.
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Ya know, every time I begin to doubt the existence of a higher power (Yes, even higher than Mel, but don't tell HER that!) something happens to reaffirm my faith. TODAY, a prodigal BH (from August 2012) who thought he needn't expose as his WW was able to convince him that she was "over" POSOM returned with a new thread. Would you care to guess why?
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Ahhh, thanks for posting that. Another spine-stiffener.
Question: after I expose (working on that right now), do I tell WW up front or wait for her to find out? Which she will, obviously.
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Normally, the idea would be to let her find out from someone on the contact list.
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OK, thanks.
What's this *67 trick that hides your phone number?
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Just dial * and then 67. You will get a dial tone and your number will not show up on the caller id. You can practice this with your cell phone and land line.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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OK, the plot thickens.
Found BWs FB page...then it was gone. Before I could send a message.
I think POSOM is going into hiding and trying to block me from contacting BW.
Ideas?
I have phone # but if he answers, I'm hosed and he will change phone number instantly.
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How would he know you have a plan? Does your wife have a keylogger on your computer?
I would try calling his wife now. And keep calling until you get her.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Did you copy and paste his facebook contacts into a word doc?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Doing all this from work, so no keylogger.
Im sure he got to his wifes FB page, and prob saw that I was/had 'visited' it. So he knew I was getting ready to contact her.
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crap, I screwed up. hes deleted everything. I didnt plan this well, and Im hosed.
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How could he see that you were on her page? There is no way I am aware of that someone can see that.'
Regardless, I would get this exposed NOW before he has a chance to pre-empt you.
You might also try signing out of your facebook and signing back in to see if he has you blocked.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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how do i see if he has me blocked? I dont know much about FB.
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how do i see if he has me blocked? I dont know much about FB. Just log out of facebook and then go and see if you can see him.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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