OK... mind you, we settled the divorce May 30, 2002, then ex wanted more stuff and got it on Jan 29, 2003 and we settled AGAIN. Well, now he emails and wants MORE stuff. This time magazines and fish books (which he was given way back in 2001, he just never opened the trunk they were in), and some tropical fish stuff in a bag.

This is totally assinine! I asked for 3 college books back from him and still haven't got those, he has been given everything he asked for and all he can do is ask for more.

He again says he will not reimburse the 1/2 of medicals because I sent copies of the bills. Well, on Jan 29, I was told I no longer have to send him originals and he paid one off of a copy. Yet he cancels my health insurance illegally...

I am so tired of him getting away with all of this stuff. He threatened me with his attorney and more fees if I didn't comply by a certain date. I can just imagine the judge when he takes us back into court for more crap (and really it is just stupid of him to want this). I almost want to let him do it, imagine the judge will totally spin on that one.

I'm trying to find out if I can file a contempt of court on my own or do I have to fire my attorney (who has not gotten back in touch with me on some rather serious issues) first? I think of the thousands of dollars ex made me spend trying to salvage the girls, the house, and the business, and I realize that at the moment, my attorney has not done too much to block exes illegal actions. I've just compromised throughout the last 2.5 years.

Anyone have any ideas how to STOP this jerk? How many times do we have to settle when it is DONE? Yeah, not signed yet because the judgement is incorrect in a few spots, but we've settled twice already. When does the judge or the attorneys say enough is enough?

I just did a bad thing and emailed him back. Said I no longer had to provide original bills, that his fish books were in a trunk given to him in 2001, the magazines were thrown out when he took the bookcase, and I no longer have anything for tropical fish as I switched to salt water. Very simple, about 4 sentences total, but I usually don't even acknowledge his emails.

Do know he is smoking pot again, that is probably how he had the "courage" to call up and leave the telephone message last week. He now has 3 people living in the house with him, he is the oldest and most successful, so it must complete his power trip.

I just want him held accountable for what he did to my kids and the others in the neighborhood. I will see him in jail for what he did.

Lori

Okay, Lori...okay.

Once you have had a minute to calm down and take a couple of deep breaths, you know as well as I do that he's just trying to yank your chain. This is probably the result of smoking some dope and thinking how COOOOOOL it would be to have tropical fish...oh! Lori has some stuff! I'll just threaten her.

There's no way to stop him. You know that. He's an addict and an abusive controller--he will do everything he can for the rest of his life to maintain some kind of control over you, and if he doesn't HAVE control, he will try to create control. It's simple, hon--just don't let him. You did a GOOD thing writing back to his email. You were concise and to the point, and it sounds to me as if there is plenty of evidence of contempt of court if he's dumb enough to drag you back to court: a)he's trying to break the settlement; b)he's refusing to pay medical bills that he agreed to--and no, you don't need to send him the originals; c)he canceled your health insurance illegally; and d)he hasn't given you some of the property he agreed to give you in the settlement (the college books).

Seriously, don't let him get to you, Lori. He's just trying to get a reaction out of you--and it seems like he has. You did fine to respond the way you did, and now if he takes you to court over these little things that you don't even have, HE will look like an idiot--not you.

Have a Starbucks and relax!

CJ

Hi bangarra,

Block his emails, and ban his number from your phone. I agree that he is just yanking the chain.

My X recently wrote asking I hand over the bed rug his grandmother crocheted.....um, no my Mum did, not his Gran. I guess we were together so long he considered the rug his, lol.

My answer to him from now on will be, no, you already got what you asked for.

But for yours.....ignore him if you can and get on to the business of getting him to pay for his abuse of the children.

Love and light,

Jacky

{{CJ}} Thanks! I KNOW he was just being a twit, I wasn't really rattled too much, I am just angry that he keeps on with this!

{{Jacky}} I don't take his phone calls and usually don't respond to his emails, either. We have a court mandated no contact policy and I try to stick to it. I'm just upset he gets to continue making his own rules and getting away with it.

I tried to post a poem my daughter wrote but when I scanned it it stayed in a .jpg format and I couldn't get it to text where I could paste it into the forum. It sort of made it clear how scrambled her mind was from the abuse, and it strengthened my resolve to have the monster that did it put away. I spoke with her for the first time in 3 weeks, she sounds good, I get to see her at the end of the month, which also happens to be her 16th birthday! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Lori