im loathe to say it..im sick to see it..but...<p>(sigh)<p>all of a sudden..after all this time......the H is having a problem with Sex. all of a sudden...(gosh im embarrassed here) it wont work right. i mean...it starts out right....and half way through...it dont. even had a problem with...i belive...a fake O...im not dumb. HELLO??? when asked aobut it...H doesn have an answer... has this happened to any of you?? <p>HELP [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img]

mercy,<p>WHY? Ask him why. My H has been having trouble this week because he has a bad cold and has been taking sinus medication. Alot of men go through this at times for various reasons. Just be sure that you don't make a big deal out of it and try to be understanding and accomodating. Ask if there is something you can do to help the situation. But before you can solve the problem, you need to know what is causing it.

I know how you feel!! It is embarrasing and doesn't do much for self esteem! My H blamed his problem on too much alcohol the first time and the second time...too little alcohol!! I guess he was telling me he has to be just drunk enough to have sex with me!!
BH

Yep, it's happened to us, too. H has never been able to ...er...function properly when drunk (which is why I really don't buy his story that he was drunk out of his mind with the STD Tramp). Yeah, I went through his fake "O", too.<p>For about a year during the time that I believe he was involved with Cafe Woman (EA, at least), he couldn't do anything either.<p>Now, he has been diagnosed as diabetic, but is not currently having problems with performance, so I'm not convinced that's why he wasn't able to comnplete sex with me a couple of years ago.<p>Blood pressure medication, alcohol consumption, anti-depressants can all have an effect on his sex drive. I read an article once that gave an example of how to figure out if the problem is physical or emotional.<p>Basically, you take a roll of stamps and stick enough around to meet before bedtime. If the stamps are broken apart in the morning, it means that the problem is likely not physical in nature. (Don't know if this works, but hey, it makes sense! [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] )<p>I know that when I observed my H as he got up in the morning, he had a "tent", so I knew it wasn't physical. That didn't make me feel any better. [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Anyway, if the problem persists, maybe he needs a physical, including testing for diabetes. Hope everything works out for you two.

Okay I will be the man here.<p>yes it has happned for a while to me.<p>I was on viagra for a bit but even that didn't seem to help some time.<p>Some of the problems that can cause it are
Overweight
Alcohol (prolonged usage or a lot previous to the act)
Liver disease
Low libodo
high blood pressure medication
certain other medication
Low testosterone<p>My suggestion talk to him about it gently (males have very fragile egos in this department. My wife was wonderful about it but that still didn't keep me from withdrawing). Suggest he see a doctor and get some bloodwork done to include a testerone count.<p>Some of the herbal stuff on the market can help TREMENDously. It generally takes a while to work (about a month or two) and can be a bit expensive but not overly so.
Some things I would recommend on the herbal side
is <p>CHrysin
L-Arginine
Horney goat weed
(I have taken these for a few months and I have no complaints except a wife who is absent to share the newfound feelings with)<p>There is another substance but I can't think of the name. Read up on the substances as the one whose name I can't think of you can't take if you have High blood pressure or a few other conditions.<p>Good luck

It can happen to me for a variety of reasons and has happened at all ages.<p>It used to happen before marriage when dating and I was being more promiscuous that I was comfortable being.<p>Then after my GF&#8217;s A, it might be due to the flashback visuals.<p>Mostly it occurs due to either too much to drink, exhaustion, or stress.<p>However, we &#8216;take turns&#8217; a lot so that when it does occur, that doesn&#8217;t necessarily mean that I stop contributing. <p>It can actually be quite freeing for the partner who is in the mood because they can be &#8216;greedy&#8217; and not worry about giving back this time. By both people taking turns, it seems like love deposits are being made in both accounts.<p>
"If you want to look impotent, then act impotent!"<p>:')<p>[ December 28, 2001: Message edited by: Vanilla'd ]</p>