Hi all i know this is a funny question and no i have never heard from H's Ow.
its just something i wonder if they do often or not??
My H is still not living with OW to my knowledge
anyway.<p>I cant understand why he is not and i cant understand why she is not pushing for it.
He has now met the kids, that upset me as i found out by accident and im sure H would have continued saying he had not.<p>OW has no idea H and i still go out and that he stays here sometimes, just as she had no idea we shared a room and bed and SF after our company xmas party, i asked him how she would feel if she knew and he said she would not be happy!!!<p>But me his wife has to put up with knowing H is with her and say nothing!!!
sorry for rambling but is OW some kinda super human never asks for anything is quite happy to see H whenever and all in the garden is rosey.<p>She divorced her H since meeting my H i would have thought she would be pushing for H to move in,
It cant be that she is worried about the kids, she had H in her bed enough when she was still married (her H worked away) and her kids were there sometimes.<p>I hate that woman so much and i have never met her!!!
i so want to ring her and knock the smile off her face by telling her h and i still sleep together and have the whole 19 months he has been seeing her.<p>Dont worry i know better than to do that, but i am really angry today!!!
Havent asked H anything in ages, but stupidly asked today if he was any closer to a decision to get the same old answer of i dont know!!<p>So i said well if you met the kids surely it means you do know and he says no.
Then he says i know i gotta sort something out when i do i will tell you.
THATS WHAT HE HAS SAID FOR 19 MONTHS GRRRRRR.<p>He seems to think something is going to flash in his head and then he will have the answer!!!
I cant help but think if he was so in love with OW he should know and nothing would stop him being with her as soon as he had the chance 6 months ago.
sorry this grew into a vent.
Liz

It has been my own personal experience (and the experience of many other betrayed wives I have met) that the OW usually only contact the wife when the MM has either ended the relationship or the OW is pretty sure he is abou to do so. Otherwise they don't want to rock the boat and jeopardize the status of the affair by making him angry or pulling everything out into the open, thereby risking being dumped. But an OW who has already been dumped or knows she is about to be has nothing to lose. Maybe she'll get real lucky and the wife will kick the MM out after talking to the OW. That's what my H's xOW was hoping for. She was hoping that I wouldn't take him back after her "revelations" and that, with nowhere else to go, he'd go back to her by default. When I had suspicions te first 2 weeks into the affair I called her (pressed redial on the phone at my house). She lied her a** off and denied everything. Her telling me the truth at that poin tin time could very well have nipped the affair in the bud and she didn't want that to happen. After he left her she suddenly decided that I "needed to know the truth" haha. All she wanted was hopefully to split apart, but if she couldn't do that she could at least get even with him by tattling and hurt me. The OP is just as purely selfish as the MP in an affair. No way is she going to call you if she doesn't think it's possibly beneficial to her.

oops. double post [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img]<p>[ February 04, 2002: Message edited by: Faith1 ]</p>

lizzle,
I'll answer for my situation. My OW sent me a letter after they "broke up" and he came home to reconcile. He was only home a week and changed his mind, so I'm really not sure all the true motivation behind him coming home. Anyway, she sent me a letter basically apologizing for sleeping with my H! She knew it was wrong, bla bla bla... but based on the lies my H told her, she thought our marriage was already over. She "promised" to stay out of the way and encourage H to work on the marriage. yeah, right. [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Prior to that letter, I never heard from her. I sent her a couple of text messages on her cell phone, and never heard back from her.<p>[ February 04, 2002: Message edited by: Faith1 ]</p>

Same here, she showed up on my doorstep after he started ending it with her. Before that not a word. She came to apologise, but mostly to complain that he was lieing to her.

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Faith1:
<strong>lizzle,
I'll answer for my situation. My OW sent me a letter after they "broke up" and he came home to reconcile. He was only home a week and changed his mind, so I'm really not sure all the true motivation behind him coming home. Anyway, she sent me a letter basically apologizing for sleeping with my H! She knew it was wrong, bla bla bla... but based on the lies my H told her, she thought our marriage was already over. She "promised" to stay out of the way and encourage Jim to work on the marriage. yeah, right. :razz:
</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Lol, the famous phony apology. I got that too. She was soooo sorry for what she did and she knew it was wrong getting involved with a MM yadda, yadda, yadda. Then she asked me if I still loved him and what I was going to do. I told her that he was the love of my life and we were going to work it out. That was NOT the answer she wanted and she suddenly became rather hostile and wasn't so "sorry" anymore. She then said something about how I could "have the lying *&^*&%&*^(&(&" because she never wanted anythign to do with him again anyway. The very next day she filled up his entire voicemail box with pleading messages for him to call her, come and see her, take her back.... That went on for afew months.

sure did and it more than likely got her what she wanted.<p>what little chance we had of working it out was totally blown partly by what she said<p>well she has him now & hope she is happy, NOT [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

Raising hand!<p>OW contacted me all right. She was a potty mouth on our answering machine. I took her to court and she got in twuuble. Ha ha on her!<p>Jo

Not much different here. When H started backing off and spending a lot of time with me and the kids. She would call H while we were out in town. Real angry, hanging up, calling again... on and on. When we went on a trip..she totally lost it and started calling me on my cell. The calls kept coming for hours at the time, I never answered any of them. She had gone to H's house to call and when H took the key away, she broke into his house to call my cell from there!! Maybe she thought I'll go mad seeing the calls coming from H's number!!?? It sure made H mad, but by that time she thought nothing to lose, H had dumped her.
Unfortunately she's still in the picture. Her former MM & his W had to get a restraining order to keep her away. She sure goes out her way to break up families...

The OW contacted me all 3 times that WH broke it off with her. Not this time tho. It is a matter of time I am sure. She even made a pass at me!!! How strange. I have heard of that before but never believed it! My advice is not to talk to her. If you feel that you must get some counsel first and make it in a letter, you tend to be calmer that way. My prayers are with you.