Today has been rough. I have been fighting thoughts of my wife’s affair out of my mind. My problem is that I have a good imagination and I have a lot of knowledge on the affair. All of these thoughts of how it began and any other scenario a person could think up. We are trying to save our marriage and our family. Does anyone have any ideas or success stories on how I can put the affair out of my mind and get rid of these thoughts? These days are hard and I want to get these thoughts out of my head.

1. Have your wife give you a picture of the other man. (I am sure she has one) Or take a picture of him yourself.

2. Blow it up to lifesized.

3. Bring it to a local shooting range and place it on the target. Take your wife with you to watch.

4. Rent a high powered automatic rifle and buy about 300 rounds from the shooting range.

5. Put your ear protectors on, it will get loud! Let your wife wear ear protection too.

6. Start shooting!!!! Force the wife to view you "target practicing" on her other lover!!!!

7. Do not quit shooting until the "other man target" is completely demolished. Or until you run out of money to buy more and more rounds!

(In no way am I advocating keeping a gun in your home, this is just a way to "rent a gun" in a safe environment and target practice to let out and vent your anger.)

My thoughts and prayers are with you , I sometimes find myself thinking negative thoughts or kicking around old mistakes and when i do i have to make myself think of something else , listen to music , or just play with the kids.
Do something to create a new habit that is positive when this happens
lol
JIMMIE

Oh my! I totally love that shooting range idea. I think I might do that myself with the OW picture!

On a more serious note...I wish you the best. Maybe try doing something for yourself to get your mind off of it.

Danielle

YES, create a new habit! Or hobby! At the shooting range!

BLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOO!!!

BLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOO!!!

HA HA, BUT SERIOUSLY FOLKS.....!

Hurt3,

I am six months out from Dday.

WW (dare I say FWW?) would meet om for sexual holidays while I was at work. He lives in Phoenix and would fly into SoCal every month, or so, and get a room at the local Best Western.

SO I HAVE HAD SOME MOVIES!!

When I see her in her underwear I automatically think "om has seen her in those and maybe helped her off with them.

OK, the first 3 months I would simply vaporize viewing the images and movies in my mind. Now I just smile slightly, shake my head and think..How long is that image going to keep popping up?

I am also on an anti-depressent, Lexepro, which is a very good thing to help you cope and operate in every day life. I started those 2 months ago and should have started earlier.

My FWW is totally committed to our M, very remorseful, has had NC since Dday so I am one of the lucky ones here at this board.

I do not know if you are in the first 2 months since Dday or not, but from the symptoms I would guess that.

The movies become less and less.

Get a good AD going. When you start obsessing (yes, what you are going through has a name, and is very common.) tell yourself that you will only obsess about this thing for an hour each day.

This obsessing is very NEGATIVE AND NOT GOOD FOR YOUR RECOVERY!! My wise FWW and the MC told me that the obsessing does nothing positive for the rebuilding of the M. If your objective is recovery and rebuilding then you must stop obsessing.

When the movies start, snap the rubber band on your wrist, visualize a large stop sign, tell yourself that you will only obsess from 10:00 to 11:00 in the morning.

Call your W when the movies start and ask her to tell you how much she loves you. AND WHY!!

Tell yourself that this is only negative thinking that is draining my soul and my energy.

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF>

Keep your self busy. Go to the gym, go jogging.

Hope that helps.

k