Or is this rhetorical?

k

Rhetorical :-)

PS: But it'd have no effect if other steps are not taken (i.e. 'make your M affair free' ;-)

Why don't I ?

Two reasons:

1. His GF and YS see some merit in his continued breathing. GF asked me not to hurt him becase they needed SOMETHING left they could respect.
2. OM GF and OM rebuilding a working relationship is a good way of reducing the risk of an affair rekindling. My beting seven colours of sheet out of him would bring focus back to bear upon what has transpired.

So I stay my hand. Or should that be baby sledge and mace.
Any of that changes and i will visit him in a heartbeat.

Why don't I?

For one reason only... jail time would mean I'm away from Undo.

to be fair...you'd have to kick WS's [censored] as well.

Hmmmm....

The real reason? Jail...plain and simple...our kids live with me and if I went to jail well guess where my kids would be?

With WS and married OM that I just beat the crap out of...not good

1. Jail

2. He would probably sue me, cause my W told him I make more money than him. She told me she didn't say how much exactly I make cause "it wasn't his business". That seemed funny to me because I would have rather she shared that intimate information on my income with him instead of the intimate thing she did share with him. I would rather he know my income instead of "knowing" my W.

I would like to offer another possible approach to this problem.

I have pondered on how adultery could be grouped into one of the numerous "hate crime" categories. Since the crime is committed against an easily definable group(betrayed spouses) and is accompanied by oral abuse, " I hate you, I never loved you" and the A partner echoes the same mantra " your husband/wife is an *sshole", I would think that there would be an alternate solution to beating the cr*p out of the OP.

Perhaps we should run this by an officer of the court and get his/her slant on the matter. Wouldn't it be nice to have a legal manner in which to both relieve our anger and extract a token of legal recourse without exposing the BS to possible criminal and financial peril?

All the more reason I keep saying,to bring back severe punishment for Adultery,forget Scarlet letters. I am talking $$$$$ and jail time.Bigger deterrents.Automatic release of all funds and property to the BS? Yes.You have to hit them in the pocket book and take away time from the OP.

We shall not sink to their level of abuse and abhorrent behavior through violence krusht.As much as we can fantasize about it( I have for sure) it's beneath you.

O

It's not that we can't ... it's just that we would need to be prepared to face the concequences of our actions.

Jail time is my only reason ...

But why should there be no repercussions for the OM? There has got to be something that I/we can do to aleiviate some of this anger and frustration.

10Girl,

It appears we are both still on the same unwavering course. Been reading your posts when I get on MB( not that often anymore). You are in my thoughts and prayers.

I think adultery should be illegal.

Jail terms and/or fines for the perpetrators.

By the way, the Bible seems to support revenge against the OM.

Proverbs 6:34
for jealousy arouses a husband's fury,
and he will show no mercy when he takes revenge.

The OM in my case is lucky to be above ground.

I had no idea what a no-fault divorce was before d-day. It is really an insane idea. I did not want to end the M. She did, but instead of telling me that, she decided to fall in love with Mr. Trailer Park. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

...But it's nobody's fault. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

While kicking his a$$ in his own trailer would have been lots of fun, it was almost as fun seeing the look on his face when I showed up over there and he thought I was going to, and at a much lower cost to me. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Worldofhurt,

Naturally you can physically go out and kill almost anyone if you choose.I am talking restraint and living a life of integrity and closer to God.

We *can't do these things because then we do sink to their level.

Take it from someone who had a long standing hatred of the homewrecker and wanted nothing but ill will to befall her.You must divert your energies in a different direction.Fantasize all you want but the OP is just a waste of time.They are opportunists.

If I had my way,OP would be just as guilty in court as the WS and suffer as well.Sometimes I wish I lived in NC.OP do not benefit from being with adulterers.Their lives are already misguided and doomed.IMO.

O

CY,

I put out a post to you some time ago but you must have missed it.I hope you will give us an update soon.I am sure to not be the only one who would like to hear how you are doing and how your Mom is doing.I am still on the D course.Only it is more adversarial now,unfortunately.

You will be in my prayers and thoughts as well~Take care

O

"We *can't do these things because then we do sink to their level."

Well, I'm gonna have to say that a man with anger or rage doesn't care or think about sinking to any levels... though you do make rational sense.

But there's just something satisfying about hearing the snap of a bone. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Sorry to threadjack

10Girl,

I am between surgeries and only have a couple of minutes.

Mom is not doing well and I have been flying back home to try to talk her into a G tube but she has been pretty adamant against it. She can no longer speak and she has been in and out of the hospital/ER with aspiration pneumonia.

My brother is now working again but faces some more surgery for assorted ortho and uro problems after his accident.

Me, I am going to mediation next week as a result of her attorney threatening to demand an expensive accountant go over my practice books ( he obviously feels that I had been hiding money from my WW before I was blindsided 1 and 1/2 years ago!) Wish I had been that clairvoyant!!!!!!!!!!!

The sound of a crack of a bone can do so much more than hours of therapy. It's a way of releasing all that negative energy so you don't take it out on your WS.

And afterwards you can contemplate it all from your jail cell. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

Now hopeful,

Isn't what you just said similar to the kind of trouble a WS gets into? It is of utmost importance to always keep a level head(care & think) or try to in difficult circumstances.

Snapping bones,in my opinion,have nothing on the efficiency and quietude a gun with silencer can bring. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> Do not pass go.Go directly to JAIL!

Ok,nuff of that.Before I get edited.

O

UGH.SO sorry about your Mom and Brother Cy.And with your WW and her threats,you have a lot on your plate.I hope you are taking good care of yourself.Take some time off work to regroup if you can.NURSES ORDERS!

I may be doing the same accountant thing soon as I feel my WH has been less than 100% honest about all our money. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Stay strong.We have to get through this.

O

Jail can be avoided if the OM hits first and the incident happens in a place you just happened to see him. No stalking please.

That's my plan anyway.

Each and every time I have seen the guy my XW had an EA with 4 years ago that went PA after our divorce I have pounded the crap out of him (2x)....this guy presented himself as a friend to my family for years and was "there for her" through "her divorce"...long after I demanded a halt to their "friendship" years before. I had a problem then and his actions when she was vulnerable will always anger the ****** out of me...He's lucky I don't see him more often...

I don't plan on hunting anyone down or stalking anyone ... but I don't think that I will have enough self control if i ever see OM.

You guys crack me up w/ the bone snapping stuff. Funny.

Not sure what is so funny. This culture pounds down the essence of manhood, forcing us to avoid conflict. Ironically, during my M troubles over the last few months, I had a huge confrontation with a coach from another baseball team. He cursed me up and down and challenged me to fight. I did the "mature" thing and held my tongue and walked away. Then, my local baseball board failed to support me on it. I got totally hosed.
I have always done the "responsible" thing and walked away. Now I am not saying I would fight in front of kids at a baseball game, but I will be much more open to picking my spots from now on. Truly, I hope I see OM in a good spot one day.


My W, and most women, don't understand being a man. You can talk all you want, but when push comes to shove it is brute strength and aggression.


Of course now this post will feed in to the "abuser" sign that was hung on me on the emotional needs board. And why should I care, exactly?????

Hey tired dad


I understand about warf pushing back his klingon side...

We all have had these types of thoughts. It's what we do w/ those thoughts that define what kind of Man we are.

Would anyone screw my wife knowing that a gang of men would pound the ****** of of him and be able to do so w/ out retribution. Probably not.

But, this culture will not bury someone up to their head and have the whole village stone them.

So look into yourself. Dont think that your the only one who is still a man. Maybe one day that man will find himself in a wrong spot. But, it shouldnt be at your hands.

and I still think the sound of the OM's bones breaking is funny. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

"But, this culture will not bury someone up to their head and have the whole village stone them."

Hmmm... I like that idea. Anyone know where I can get some fire ants? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Post deleted by FinallyLearning-T2M

I love my WS ... I would never do anything to hurt her. My thoughts are NOT directed towards her, they are directed towards the OM who knowingly took advantage of my WS when she was in a vulnerable state ... as part of my 'role' as a husband, is it not my responsability to create a safe enviroment for my wife? and doing that ma require the removal of anything that could hurt her ... like spiders that will bite her while she sleeps, like a snake that would bite her if she stepped on it without knowing ... like the OM who would prey on a vulnerable person.

All together now...

<SNAP>
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

thanks. i think i am being too sensitive again.

Please understand that the above was / is my hurt and anger speaking. I am not a violent man.


Sorry for the harsh words in, it was out of character for me.

Hmm.

I remian in two mind about the 'it make you as bad as them' attitude to damaging OM.

God says forgive, but he also physically threw the moneylenders out of the temple.

My upbringing and culture dictates that OM f'ked my woman and so his @ss is grass and I am the mower.

until eithe rhe or I die I have permission to offer him wahatever damage i so choose.

I will be honest - my final communication with OM was a well researched threat. He contacts anyone in my family ever again and firstly I exposse his nefarious sidelines to all authorities and secondly he will not be able to get inhis car without a thorough check, drink a coke wihout testing or walk alone at night for the rest of his life without looking over his shoulder.

He replied saying he understood. My research was very detailed.

So in truth one reason I don't kick the ******* **** out of OM is that its fun him fearing that I will.

And TD, yes I am an unreconstructed hunter gatherer. I am a Man with a capital M.

And i will not apologise for such.