Need help fast. - 10/12/07 03:49 PM
Hello,
Need help with some things. I have been married for 10 years. The day after the honeymoon my husband lost his job. That really hit me hard. Moved around a lot because after that he could not seem to keep a job. Went through three repossessions because got behind on the car note. I felt so drained and I had no one to talk to because I felt like people were laughing behind my back. I could not talk to my family because they were all talking about my husband. Never had a family that just discussed their problems so I did not know how to talk to my husband.
Eventually I started to withhold from him. In six years he could count on his hands how many times we had sex. He begged for us to get help and I just would not go anywhere.
Well after six years of begging he cheated. He was with another women for about a year. They broke it off and then he went back and she got pregnant. He begged me to forgive him and they have never been back together. She will not let him see the child because he and I are back together.
It has been about two and a half years and things are no better. I get days when I just really do not want to be around him. Now he complains all the time about me not showing him any affection. He complains that I do not initiate sex with him and he do not feel loved or wanted. I feel like he do not hold me or talk to me unless I have sex with him. I am very miserable because it is like no matter what I say he just do not get it. He thinks it is all about him. If I say anything he would say that I would not have these problems if I would have never withheld from him and if I would not do it now.
I am lost. I do not know where to go from here. I do not see a way to fix this other then ignoring what I am feeling and just do what he wants. Help I am lost.
Need help with some things. I have been married for 10 years. The day after the honeymoon my husband lost his job. That really hit me hard. Moved around a lot because after that he could not seem to keep a job. Went through three repossessions because got behind on the car note. I felt so drained and I had no one to talk to because I felt like people were laughing behind my back. I could not talk to my family because they were all talking about my husband. Never had a family that just discussed their problems so I did not know how to talk to my husband.
Eventually I started to withhold from him. In six years he could count on his hands how many times we had sex. He begged for us to get help and I just would not go anywhere.
Well after six years of begging he cheated. He was with another women for about a year. They broke it off and then he went back and she got pregnant. He begged me to forgive him and they have never been back together. She will not let him see the child because he and I are back together.
It has been about two and a half years and things are no better. I get days when I just really do not want to be around him. Now he complains all the time about me not showing him any affection. He complains that I do not initiate sex with him and he do not feel loved or wanted. I feel like he do not hold me or talk to me unless I have sex with him. I am very miserable because it is like no matter what I say he just do not get it. He thinks it is all about him. If I say anything he would say that I would not have these problems if I would have never withheld from him and if I would not do it now.
I am lost. I do not know where to go from here. I do not see a way to fix this other then ignoring what I am feeling and just do what he wants. Help I am lost.