I got the letter in the mail. Clod and plain as it is. As of 16Feb I am divorced.<P>I really have no feelings yet because the loss of my uncle still has my emotions overpowered.<P>I am certain it will catch up in due course but today I feel nothing about it.<P>I did what Steve Harlety suggested and in the end I am ok. I don't know what more to say about it...<P>Love you guys,<P>Bill

I am sorry to hear of your news.<P>I vacillate between wanting it to be over and asking her if she is committed to her present course of action.<P>Or maybe this is just a bad day for me.<P>Keep the faith. You will be OK.

<B>WiallamJ</B><P>My dear friend, you know how I feel. I can only offer this at this moment.<P>{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{WiallamJ}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>You know I love you and care. Just as so many others do here a MB.<P>Know you are in my thoughts and prayers.<P>------------------<BR><B>God bless you and all of us. We are all going to make it, all of us! With God on our side we can't lose! What God has joined together let no man put asunder. <P>Samantha</B><p>[This message has been edited by A blessed Samantha (edited February 22, 2001).]

Bill,<P>I'm not sure whether to say I'm sorry or what??<P>Hey! You got the letter today and today is the 15th anniversary of my first date with A$$! What a coincidence! <P>You know, as well as I do, that you'll be ok. There may be some tough days ahead, but you'll get thru them just like you have everything else. <P>You're one of the good guys!<P>Love ya,<BR>Mitzi

Bill...<P>{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Bill}}}}}}}}}}}}}},<P>I'm sorry we couldn't get together when you were up here...<P>You have my heart and my prayers.<P>You've done all you can...<BR>...and can't live by or through your xW's failings.<P>You know God is by your side...<BR>...as are we.<P>...even now... <B>You are not alone</B>!<P>...even now... <B>You are loved</B>!<P>I too will join you...<BR>...on March 19th... at 1:30PM... <P>But I too...<BR>...know I gave it my all<BR>...know that God has given me a different road<BR>...know my duty to my children<P>...and have all your well wishes<BR>......(as I wish for you)<BR>...as we are much more than kindred spirits on this earth... and even more in the above.<P>Love and peace to you my brother...<BR>...always... <P>Jim

Bill,<P>Sorry to hear the sad news. It does get easier. I actually talked to x today and it was like I was talking to another one of the kid's friend's parents. Nothing more, nothing less.<P>Hang in !!<P>God Bless,<P>Bob

There really isn't anything right to say in this situation. It is tough no matter how you look at it.<P>I'm sorry that you are going through all of this with the rest of us. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.<P>Jennifer

Well, you were married one day longer than I was! <P>Really, though, don't look at it as an end, look at it as a new beginning. As it was with your uncle, you had no control over the situation, and nothing to do now but move on. Like a death in the family, there is nothing you can do but go on with your life as best you can. <P>I remember when a good friend of mine died in a horrible car accident. At the funeral, his parents had something interesting to say. They said "we had him for 25 wonderful years...we would be greedy if we asked for more." <P>I've adopted their attitude since then. Every day above ground is a gift. Like you, I've been divorced for a week. But I don't look upon myself as a failure. I just goofed once...when I got married. No big deal, I know guys (like my FIL) who have been married 3 or 4 times. At least I'm par for the course!<P>You are too. Think about what you're going to do with your freedom. The future is all yours from here. Carpe diem, William!

(((((Bill)))))

Guillaum mon cher,<P>something and someone a whole lot more wonderful is coming along for you--just be patient and do the right things. And count your many blessings, and thank God for them. You do have many of them. You will look back on this someday and know that you won bigtime in the end.<P>Je vous aime<BR>Marie<p>[This message has been edited by Bernzini (edited February 22, 2001).]

Bill,<P>It's just another step in the process we are all going through. You will still have your ups and your downs, but day by day, things should get a little easier.<P>Just keep on keeping on. You are going to be fine.<P>-Shawn

Hey Dude,<P>Another one bites the dust, huh? Well, you tried your best and your conscience is clean. Sorry, I know you were fighting with yourself going back and forth about her and the M. GEEZ, that sounds familiar.<P>It is sad to see the end of a M. I know when Val [living with Brian] got the final decree in the mail she called me on my cell and was crying. Wondered if she could still call me since we are now D. Silly rabbit!<P>It seems now that the pressure is off [not being H and W and/or wanting to reconsile] we get along better than we had in the last few previous years. She calls and we laugh and tease each other. Maybe she wants to start dating again?<P>Take care Buddy. Wishing us all the Best.<P>Zippy

{{{{{{{{{{{{{Bill}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>I'm sorry, my friend. <P>Love,<P>Lori

Hi Bill,<P>love you heaps - <P>take care of you, and know that I'm thinking of you.<P>Jo xxxxxxxx

William, mon ami......je pense de toi....<P> <P><B>"Ripple"</B><P><BR> If my words did glow with the gold of sunshine<BR> And my tunes were played on the harp unstrung<BR> Would you hear my voice come through the music<BR> Would you hold it near as it were your own?<P> It's a hand-me-down, the thoughts are broken <BR> Perhaps they're better left unsung<BR> I don't know, don't really care <BR> Let there be songs to fill the air<P> <P> Ripple in still water<BR> When there is no pebble tossed<BR> Nor wind to blow <P> Reach out your hand if your cup be empty<BR> If your cup is full may it be again<BR> Let it be known there is a fountain<BR> That was not made by the hands of men <P> There is a road, no simple highway<BR> Between the dawn and the dark of night<BR> And if you go no one may follow <BR> <B>That path is for your steps alone</B><P> You who choose to lead must follow<BR> But if you fall you fall alone<BR> If you should stand then who's to guide you?<BR> If I knew the way I would take you home<P><BR><I><BR>("Ripple" composed and written by Jerry Garcia and Robert Hunter. Reproduced by arrangement with Ice Nine Publishing<BR>Co., Inc. (ASCAP))</I><P>William...I'm holding you in my heart.....<BR>you are much loved mon ami....<P>Dylan<BR>

Bill,<P>I'm not sure what to say. Words of encouragement in this situation are hard for me to express. <P>One time you said something like...We aren't better people BECAUSE of divorce, we can be better people in spite of divorce.<P>I don't consider divorce a blessing, yet we are forced to overcome it nonetheless. It's not fair. We all have an idea what the "ideal" outcome will be, but I do know for a fact that you did everything humanly possible and somehow managed to remain loving till the end. I'm so very proud of you. My thoughts are with you, dearest Bill.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by WilliamJ:<BR><B>I got the letter in the mail. Clod and plain as it is. As of 16Feb I am divorced.</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Y'know, I never even received notice of the results of the final hearing July 19? I've just taken XW's word that we are actually divorced (shoemaker [lawyer] goes barefoot here ). Opposing counsel should have mailed me a copy, but he didn't.<P>Better to have the paper than be in limbo here. I guess I should go to the courthouse and pay the $2 for my own copy.<P>It will get easier with time.<P>{{{{WilliamJ}}}}

Bill,<P>You know I love you right? I'm so proud to call you a friend and I admire you so much. You gave it all you had and now you can walk away without any regrets!!<P>Sending Hugs and Prayers Your Way....<P><P>------------------<BR><B>God, Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change...Courage to change the things I can...And the wisdom to know the difference.</B><P>lady_divine77@yahoo.com

I am so sorry Bill, mine will be final in April. You are in my prayers.<BR>Can I say it..... Divorce Sucks!!!<P>Take Care,<BR>Petrie<P>

Bill,<BR>I am sorry to here about your divorce, but now it is time to go forward. You did everything right, everything you could. She made the choice you gave her every chance. My dear friend I think of you often, know that you are loved and in my prayers. <BR>Hugs<P>------------------<BR>di<P>

Man I am pissed Y'All!! I had a reply to each of you and ZAPP it gets lost in cyber-space!!<P>Just know I thank each of you very much for the sentiments...<P>To those I corrispond with outside of the forum...You know me better than I know myself in many ways and I thank you for blessing me with your friendships... <P>Tonight was kinda rough...I went to friends house for dinner, we roomed together the 4 of us before our perspective marriges, we stood up in each others weddings, our D's are the samer age...Tonight was the first time I actually spent good time with them in a year....It was strange being there with only Abbey and no Ex...I miss these friends and the companionship we had lots of good times as couples together...Developing a new type of relationship is going to be difficult, but I need to they are great folks and I love them dearly...<P>I really hate my reply got lost...UUURRRGGGHHH<P>Oh well...<P>I love you all very much...<P>Oh BTW, Bonnet...easy on the kisses...I've been without affection for too long LOL LOL LOL<P>Bill

{{{{{{{Bill}}}}}}<P>Sorry for the late reply on your thread, I'm not here a lot any more. <P>You gave it your best, just like Jim and many other great guys here on the board. You deserve better and you'll have it one day. I believe we all will. <P>No matter how bad this all is, and it gets pretty bad and bad for the kids as well, I can't help but believe, and really hope that this is all for some reason and one day, we'll have a better life out of it in some small way. If I didn't believe that, I'd become bitter so thats all I can do.<P>I remember the day I got my d papers, 3 days before my anniversary. My lawyer cleverly stalled mailing ex's for a few days and his arrived on our anniversary. I'll never forget how mad he was. But I was numb. Didn't feel much of anything. I think its not only a weight lifted, because in a way it is, but its also a shock. <P>You'll still have some bad days, hopefully not as many, and I still have plenty. <P>I hope you'll stick around and offer your support to those that follow behind us, Hugs, Dana<BR>

{{{{{{{{{{{{{Bill}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>Hang in there bud.... it does get better. I know I've said it before, but I just passed my 1 year "anniversary" of the D, and things are good.<P>Take care of you and Abbey!<P>Love & Smooches,<BR>Dawnetta<P>------------------<BR>There are deep sorrows and killing cares in life, but the encouragement and love of friends were given us to make all difficulties bearable. <BR>-- John Oliver Holmes<P>The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference.<BR>-- Elie Wiesel<P><BR>

William,<BR>I'm still here - Still with you. You have grown so much<BR>through this unfortunate experience. It is as said: we gain<BR>tremendous strength and wisdom through our most agonizing<BR>experiences.<BR>I for one do not like the sound nor existance of divorce as<BR>we have come to utilize it in America today. Our ease of<BR>execution of divorce makes marriage little more than a <BR>purchased commodity with a no-time-limit return receipt<BR>attached.<P>I truly don't believe that love dies, but only gets buried<BR>sometimes so deeply that one does not recognize it's still<BR>there. Even so, past love is a very potent fertilizer for<BR>the growth of a remarkably healthy future love - one which<BR>you too shall experience.<P>I'm very proud of you.<P>SamH

SamH - well said.<P>