Presumed father needs legal advice - 06/08/04 05:42 AM
My son has been divorced for nearly 6 years.
In 1995, his ex ran off with his former best friend. Their 2 sons were visiting us at the time. Ex-DiL found out that we knew what she had done (the OM's wife called us), so she didn't come to pick up the boys. She stayed gone a month, and then came back to our son. We welcomed her back, thinking that she had learned her lesson.
8-1/2 months later, our granddaughter was born. Although we thought maybe she might belong to the OM all during the pregnancy, it really didn't matter to us. Son was willing to accept her as his, so H and I were, too. However, I do believe that she is our biological grandchild. She looks like my side of the family, and the hospital notation of Estimated Due Date was 3 weeks after her actual birth, plus she was a much smaller baby than her brothers, so I do believe she was premature.
A couple of years ago, ex-DiL and her then BF broke into son's house and stole some checks. When he informed her that he would not cover them for her and had reported the checks as stolen, she brought all 3 kids to him and disappeared for 6 weeks. We assume that she finally paid off the bad checks she wrote.
In February, she informed our son that she was remarrying and moving to another state. Son, who has always been consistently involved with his children, told her that he would never agree to her taking the children so far away. She agreed to relinquish custody to him. A couple of weeks before she was due to move, someone turned her in to DHS, and DHS were questioning the kids at school. I don't know the details of the report, but I'm not surprised. The last time I was at their house, I could hardly take a breath for the stench from her dogs. The house was filthy. Anyway, she brought the kids to our son's house the very evening that DHS came to the school. Apparently DHS was supposed to come to check out the living arrangements within the next couple of days, and I guess she was afraid they would just take the kids and put them into foster care or something.
Now, Son has filed for custody and has already gotten temporary custody. As soon as ex-DiL was served, she showed up at the kids' school, planning to take them to Texas. Thankfully, they had a copy of our son's last temporary custody order dated AFTER the divorce papers she showed up with. The school's security guard escorted her to the gate.
Since then, Son has gotten a new temporary custody order, so he allowed the children to go visit their mother for a few weeks. We are using this time to fix up the kids' rooms and make his house into more of a home, as opposed to a bachelor pad.
Son just got served with the counter-suit, which he expected. Here's the kicker: She is claiming that he has no right to custody of granddaughter and demanding paternity testing. This is killing him to think that G-daughter may have been told that he is not her daddy. She's a big Daddy's girl, and we're afraid this could emotionally rip her apart.
All this from a mother who has basically abandoned her kids 3 times over a different man each time!
Can anyone give me a good website for support on this issue? I don't really think S has to worry about losing his parental rights if he isn't the bio-dad, as I think she would have to then name the ex-OM as father. BTW, the ex-OM is currently in prison. Nice, huh?
Any ideas as to what to do, anyone?
In 1995, his ex ran off with his former best friend. Their 2 sons were visiting us at the time. Ex-DiL found out that we knew what she had done (the OM's wife called us), so she didn't come to pick up the boys. She stayed gone a month, and then came back to our son. We welcomed her back, thinking that she had learned her lesson.
8-1/2 months later, our granddaughter was born. Although we thought maybe she might belong to the OM all during the pregnancy, it really didn't matter to us. Son was willing to accept her as his, so H and I were, too. However, I do believe that she is our biological grandchild. She looks like my side of the family, and the hospital notation of Estimated Due Date was 3 weeks after her actual birth, plus she was a much smaller baby than her brothers, so I do believe she was premature.
A couple of years ago, ex-DiL and her then BF broke into son's house and stole some checks. When he informed her that he would not cover them for her and had reported the checks as stolen, she brought all 3 kids to him and disappeared for 6 weeks. We assume that she finally paid off the bad checks she wrote.
In February, she informed our son that she was remarrying and moving to another state. Son, who has always been consistently involved with his children, told her that he would never agree to her taking the children so far away. She agreed to relinquish custody to him. A couple of weeks before she was due to move, someone turned her in to DHS, and DHS were questioning the kids at school. I don't know the details of the report, but I'm not surprised. The last time I was at their house, I could hardly take a breath for the stench from her dogs. The house was filthy. Anyway, she brought the kids to our son's house the very evening that DHS came to the school. Apparently DHS was supposed to come to check out the living arrangements within the next couple of days, and I guess she was afraid they would just take the kids and put them into foster care or something.
Now, Son has filed for custody and has already gotten temporary custody. As soon as ex-DiL was served, she showed up at the kids' school, planning to take them to Texas. Thankfully, they had a copy of our son's last temporary custody order dated AFTER the divorce papers she showed up with. The school's security guard escorted her to the gate.
Since then, Son has gotten a new temporary custody order, so he allowed the children to go visit their mother for a few weeks. We are using this time to fix up the kids' rooms and make his house into more of a home, as opposed to a bachelor pad.
Son just got served with the counter-suit, which he expected. Here's the kicker: She is claiming that he has no right to custody of granddaughter and demanding paternity testing. This is killing him to think that G-daughter may have been told that he is not her daddy. She's a big Daddy's girl, and we're afraid this could emotionally rip her apart.
All this from a mother who has basically abandoned her kids 3 times over a different man each time!
Can anyone give me a good website for support on this issue? I don't really think S has to worry about losing his parental rights if he isn't the bio-dad, as I think she would have to then name the ex-OM as father. BTW, the ex-OM is currently in prison. Nice, huh?
Any ideas as to what to do, anyone?