Need opinion on right vs wrong - 10/04/06 06:55 PM
My boyfriend (45) and I (41) have been dating for 8 months now. We have a difference of opinion and we'd like to see what others would think.
I work in an office environment, aka cubicle world. I've been at this job for almost 6 years now so I know all the people, almost like another family. Its a very casual environment, we can wear what we want, and some have flex hours. We have a very diverse office as well. Straight and Gay. The employers try to make it a fun place to spend our 40 hours.
A lot of joking goes on in the work place. Sometimes it has sexual "undertones". Sometimes, its just plain old joking around like friends. No one that works here has ever said anything that would offend someone else so much as to have to report it as sexual harrasment. So, here's my story....
One day a (gay) man came over into my area all laughing and smiling. He had a lei around his neck. I looked at him and told him I wasn't gonna ask what he was wearing around his neck. He chuckled and said it was his birthday and that he got lei'd. One of the ladies in the office gave it to him. Everyone within ear shot just chuckled because, well, its Joe!
I told my boyfriend about this and he was upset that we even talk about that. Since its a work place its unprofessional and he asked if that's the way we talk all the time. Since he asked me that, I listened and since we are in cubicle world, I guess yes, it happens at least 3 or 4 times a week. No one here sees anything wrong with it.
He told me he lost some respect for me because I talk that way at work. That I shouldn't even talk that way to anyone but him. He asked me if it would bother me if he did that at his work. He is a driver so goes around to different locations and sees different people all day. My response was that if I was comfortable enough in a relationship that No, it doesn't bother me. I know he loves ME and only ME. I'm not threatened by it. Maybe I'm a fool, but I trust others until they do something to take that away from me.
So, am I being disrespectful to him and should stand up at work and tell people its not appropriate? Is he blowing things out of proportion? Comments please... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> [color:"blue"] [/color]
I work in an office environment, aka cubicle world. I've been at this job for almost 6 years now so I know all the people, almost like another family. Its a very casual environment, we can wear what we want, and some have flex hours. We have a very diverse office as well. Straight and Gay. The employers try to make it a fun place to spend our 40 hours.
A lot of joking goes on in the work place. Sometimes it has sexual "undertones". Sometimes, its just plain old joking around like friends. No one that works here has ever said anything that would offend someone else so much as to have to report it as sexual harrasment. So, here's my story....
One day a (gay) man came over into my area all laughing and smiling. He had a lei around his neck. I looked at him and told him I wasn't gonna ask what he was wearing around his neck. He chuckled and said it was his birthday and that he got lei'd. One of the ladies in the office gave it to him. Everyone within ear shot just chuckled because, well, its Joe!
I told my boyfriend about this and he was upset that we even talk about that. Since its a work place its unprofessional and he asked if that's the way we talk all the time. Since he asked me that, I listened and since we are in cubicle world, I guess yes, it happens at least 3 or 4 times a week. No one here sees anything wrong with it.
He told me he lost some respect for me because I talk that way at work. That I shouldn't even talk that way to anyone but him. He asked me if it would bother me if he did that at his work. He is a driver so goes around to different locations and sees different people all day. My response was that if I was comfortable enough in a relationship that No, it doesn't bother me. I know he loves ME and only ME. I'm not threatened by it. Maybe I'm a fool, but I trust others until they do something to take that away from me.
So, am I being disrespectful to him and should stand up at work and tell people its not appropriate? Is he blowing things out of proportion? Comments please... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> [color:"blue"] [/color]