Ok, im not to tech savy here, do you have to do it from the computer that w is using or can you do it from another computer and give email address, im a little lost here

RW, can you access her computer? I am not aware of any programs that can be installed remotely but there may be. eblaster has to be installed once and from there on out it will email you daily reports. here

Riverway,
I'm so sorry for your Dday and finding out there was more than one OM. You might like this keylogger - it offers technical support.

http://www.awarenesstech.com/Cheating/Testimonials.html

Gg

I may have messed up and asked who the OM is, and this was her reply; I told you I would go to counseling but I will tell you that I will NOT reveal the name of the guy. He had NO idea I was married. I sought him out and he thought I was single. He remains anonymous�PERIOD. If you cannot deal with that, then I do not see how counseling will help.

Did I mess up, does this or should this come out during counseling? I assume she will stick to her guns..

Riverway, don't assume anything. If you're counseling with the Harleys, it will become necessary to reveal OM's identity. Otherwise, she's not in recovery yet, and is clinging to OM.

In the future, DON'T ASK. Instead, snoop, spy, and be stealthy. Check emails, phone call records and texts (my WW used a girl friend's name instead of his at first, until Dday, then she "became honest" and used his real name). Install a keylogger on her computer, buy and hide voice recorders in her car and where she might conduct "private" conversations -- and LEARN FOR YOURSELF.

Have you read about the Carrot and Stick of Plan A? You don't directly confront her about the A and OM. Instead, you are Mr. Sweetness personified to her face, and Sherlock Holmes and the Town Crier behind her back. You discover, uncover and expose. And all the while, you show her why she chose to marry you in the first place. Got it?

This should be dug up by your own sleuthing. Either hire a PI or find out some other way. Have you looked at all the phone #s on your phone bill and done a reverse look up?

She gave you a pretty powerful weapon with the above. He either does not know she is married, which means that you can kill her affair by contacting him or he is married and knows she is married, which means you can kill the affair by exposing to his wife.

You need to find out who the guy is on your own.

"So to clear this up, we should not start counseling until her current affair is over or??"

Nooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Call the Harley's today ASAP.