No contact since mayish, apparently OMW found all of the emails which was very descriptive and damaging. I was told that the emails were the only contact, then later after I dug a bit WW revealed that they were actually seeing each other.

WW and I talked a bit more tonight about going through marriage builders and she basically said that she doesn't have the emotional energy to do it right now and doesn't want to commit to doing it later. She also said that she doesn't want to divorce because of our children so basically the marriage is back to where it was when OM got married and there was an extended period of no contact.

She said that our marriage was like living a lie and neither of us want to fake it anymore, but that we don't really have a choice because of our children.

So basically she isn't over OM and is pissed that she is stuck with me. It seems obvious that she will split the second that the kids are out of the house.

I told her that we didn't have to live this way and that marriage builders works, but she didn't really want to hear it. I told her that we have nothing to loose and the whole world to gain, but for now I guess it's easier to be angry and bitter ( told you she was stubborn.) She is the type that won't take the easy way out if it means that she would be wrong.

As long as NC is in place and she isn't checking on him I think it's probably better for me to stop talking about him because I am being the trigger. Perhaps it would be much easier to convenience her to do marriage builders when I'm not dragging out all the hurt and pain again.

I will say though that an unhappy marriage is prime for another affair, but I don't think she would do that at this point because the pain of this one is still fresh on everyone's mind and because I think that she values this pile of dung enough to not replace him.

Part of me wants to leave and be done with it. I love this girl and want to keep our family together, but the emotional abuse is great and its starting to feel like divorce would be the easier path to take.

ak1, I missed this part. She is probably still in touch with the OM. And this statement tells me she has no intention whatsoever of working on your marriage. In that case, I would suggest you get an attorney and make plans to file on grounds of adultery. Getting divorced would be preferable to the life of hell she expects you to endure.