Psalms 51:1-3 (NLT)
1 Have mercy on me, O God, because of your unfailing love. Because of your great compassion, blot out the stain of my sins. 2 Wash me clean from my guilt. Purify me from my sin. 3 For I recognize my shameful deeds--they haunt me day and night.
David is recounting his sin with Bathsheba and asking God to have mercy on him; for David knows the sins he committed and the sin weights heavily on his heart as shame and guilt.
Imagine holding a map of your life in your hand; you are ready to move forward, make new decisions and do things for the Lord. However, sins in your life have left shame not deal with; those sins and shame become like a compass helping direct life. In one direction there is withdrawal. Our sin seems too great for others to know so if we just withdraw they won’t find out about my sin. But once we withdraw and disconnect we have lost touch with God, and people who could listened and help. We miss opportunities to grow because we are afraid to proceed with our shame and guilt. The next direction we could turn is towards attacking our self. We limit the pain of guilt and shame by accepting we are defective and not worth loving. Because you want to be the looser, there will always be someone who goes along with you on your journey as long as they remain the winner. Another direction people will head is to find someone to accept them for the loser they are. Then the person is still carrying the shame, but they are no longer isolated, and the other person reminds them of their shame and guilt. The problem in this relationship the sin and shame intensifies for the person and the one trying to help by accepting them and loving them as they are not aware their reinforcement of the shame and guilt is causing the person to explode when they cannot control their emotions any longer. The last direction we could head is to attack others. We don’t like the loneliness of shame, we don’t like the associated pain, or any of the feelings we are having. Here we reduced the self esteem of someone else. We will use bullying, verbal/physical abuse to control the person. This person cannot deal with shame, so the one taking on the shame for them ends up with the majority of the abuse. There is one last option and that is for the person to take responsibility for their shame. God loves you no matter what and He is willing to take the shame from you by forgiving you and extending mercy. In Philippians is says , “I will not be put to shame in anything, but that with all boldness, Christ will even now, as always, be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death.” Let Christ keep from you the shame Satan tries to sell us a lie that we are unworthy to be loved by anyone. Know that God and Christ love you. Pray that God would help remove any hidden shame you might have. Confess that shame to God. Don’t let the enemies trick of making you feel guilty and shameful over sin win you away from the truth that God loves you no matter what you have done.