Hey aNewName

I think traveling to the wedding and keeping those connections at the wedding for your son is exactly what you need to do.
THAT is supporting your son and as a parent THAT is what we are called to do.

I don't agree with dad and boyfriend going fishing with son and how nice that all looks - great?? I don't think so!!
I'm only pointing out it isn't about boundries for you and XH or XW. It's about protecting the boundries and the love banks of the kids and teaching them whats not acceptable after a DIVORCE. It's not acceptable to allow someone else to steal my time with my dad or my mom...
It's not acceptable to bring my dad's girlfriend or my mom's boyfriend around me for a long time - thats selfish behavior from parents....Who only want what they want!!!
I hear it now ........ "my kids are doing fine with all this" GIVE ME A BREAK!

The questions you might start asking is "How might this affect them as adults in their own marriages"? or
"What can I do to protect my childs love for me and for my X"? or
"What would be the boundries I need to have in place to protect my child from myelf or my X and let help them learn what divorce would look like if they ever chose the same path in their future"(they need to know it's ugly) or
"would it be nice for my child to have all of me when we are together on holidays(even if it is sad for THE ADULT parent)and allow them to meet my needs and allow myself to meet their needs"

Once divorced it's never perfect again for a kid ...... it's just adults need to be adults and save the boyfriend, girlfriend relationships for when you don't have the kids in your care .......I don't care how nice everybody is with each other, it doesn't protect the kids and it sure doesn't help them adjust (another lie adults tell each other to make themselves feel better).

things often look rosey through the eyes of our lies

Recovery began 10/07;

Meeting my wife's EN's is my "thank you" that refuses to be silenced.