My husband is very similiar to Patriot. He JUST sent me this e-mail (part of it)............

My "victimish" letter yesterday was my realization of how much hurt I continue to cause you when I feel like I'm trying not to hurt you.

I don't want to continue causing you pain and even when I think I'm not going to....I do. You don't deserve that and I am thinking the only way to actually stop it is to go our seperate ways until at least I'm a better person. Then maybe if you were still interested, we may try dating.

I'm done. He KNOWs a lot of what has been causing me pain and doesn't do anything about it.

I'm going to post this on my thread. I just wanted to post here to give a birds eye view of what I consider to be victimish.

Husband was unfaithful to me before and after our marriage, at least 7 times. I found out 13 yrs into the marriage. Trickle truth for an entire year. Several different d-days, so it was more like a d-year. Difficult recovery.