Cherished,

Very few people think it is ok to lie and murder too. One could say that to lie shows an wanton ability to set aside moral values don't you think? That is why I wonder about the intent of this tread. And I'm not trying to say that adultery is on the same scale as lying, because it isn't.

When I said I had an A because I wanted to, what I was trying to do is tell the simple truth. Of course my marriage had issue at the time, ENs were not being met, yada yada yada, but that wasn't why I did it. I didn't respect my marriage the way it should have been respected. I didn't think about my wife at all at the time. It was all about what I wanted at the moment. I wasn’t yet a proper man or a husband. A proper husband protects his wife. A proper man doesn’t hurt the woman that loves him.

To me, saying that it was some lack or weak character trait almost makes me not responsible for what I did . . . see I had this defect that made me do it. Hogwash.

On a different note, why do you think your husband feels the way he does, why does he think he is there just to fixe the sink? I’m sure it isn’t pleasant to feel that. If your husband is a narcissist, then his actions are not in violation of his moral code. He acted just the way a narcissist would. He wanted something and he took it. No regret.