***Their moral philosophy was situational rather than virtue or duty based.

I think you have 100% hit the nail on the head with this. My XWH was exactly like somebody proud of the fact that he never stole money - until he started working in a bank and for the first time had the *opportunity* to steal money. Then he never thought twice about it.

In XWH's case, he started working for a very large corporation which provides all employess with absolute secrecy from spouses (their email, meetings, outings, business trips, company newsletters and especially corporate dinners and celebrations are all completely inaccessible to "outsiders" - including spouses.)

All this secrecy, combined with a company full of cheap ho-bag girls who were more than happy to date a married man who could provide them with a promotions, parties and President's Plates, was just waaayy too much temptation for him (and most of them) to put up healthy boundaries against.

So they didn't bother.

The place is full of crazy spouses and broken families. But that's just a coincidence. They have no idea why it's like that.

I don't think I'll ever get past knowing that the very, very good man I *thought* he was for many years instantly chose to walk out and divorce me once he finally realized I would NEVER play second fiddle to some corporate wh*re.

Character? What character? This was a case of situational morals, pure and simple. And I was too dumb/naive to realize that's how he was until way too late.
Mulan