Originally Posted By: catperson
What does that have to do with him keeping you 'off balance?' Are you saying he is trying to hurt you in any way? What does 'off balance' mean to you? Maybe I'm misunderstanding.


When someone does something that triggers my insecurity and makes me feel off balance, I become irrationally jealous. I don't do it intentionally or with malice, but it can hurt those close to me anyway. It is a knee-jerk reaction that is difficult for me to control.

When someone does something that triggers his insecurities and makes him feel off balance, he pushes back and tries to make the other person feel insecure and off balance. I don't believe it is intentional or malicious, but it can hurt those close to him anyway. It is is a knee-jerk reaction that is difficult for him to control.

We both need to work on healthier ways of dealing with insecurity. We both need to control our reactions so we don't hurt the other.

The good news is, we both are smile After he saw how hard I was working on controlling my own love busters, he went to work on his. The result of facing this conflict with honesty and respect has been a deepening of our love and commitment.