Originally Posted by markos
but I will let you know that in Christian theology, a person isn't redeemed in the eyes of God by doing good from now on, no matter how much they may do. It is as if you tried to clean a dirty, oily rag with pure water. You can wash and wash and wash, but the oil is still in the rag and it is still filthy. (Because you took a swim in dirty oil. We all did.) Washing that rag clean is going to require soap. Very special Soap.

Understatement.

The fact is that in Christian theology the whole idea of you redeeming yourself in the eyes of God by your actions is massively blasphemous.

However, redeeming yourself in the eyes of your wife? That is completely Christian, and I believe it is exactly what God wants. But to do that you will have to tailor yourself to HER perspective, not to some perspective which you imagine belongs to God and is therefore omniscient and objective.

Her feelings are the key.

If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.