Originally Posted by Enlightened_Ex
I fought, I lost, there is no way I'd advise anyone to fight, period. If I got a different result, I'd give a different recommendation.

If something works for you, you recommend it. If it doesn't work, then one cannot in good conscience recommend it. I am giving the only logical recommendation I can give given my experienced results. If you want to change my mind, change my result.

Your comparison to alcoholism is an apples to oranges comparison. Your decision to drink or not drink is entirely yours, not dependent upon the choices of another person. The outcome of any legal battle or relationship issue is not dependent only upon your actions. Therefore, it's not a valid comparison.

No, it is not apples to oranges. Your premise is that nothing should be done unless there is a guaranteed outcome, so it is most certainly analogous. If I used your logic I would have never tried. It is the same with BH's coming here for help. Just because you lost doesn't mean others do.

Like I said, many others have won. No guarantee other than the fact that one is guaranteed to lose if they DON'T try. Your plan comes with a guarantee to lose. Harley's come with a CHANCE, albeit a small chance.

As far as telling newcomers not to try, that there is no hope, you might want to rethink that since the purpose of the forum is not to promote your personal opinion to newcomers, but Dr Harley's opinion. The sign on the door is Marriage Builders.

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101