Originally Posted by bitbucket
If I was dating and the lady told me she was saving herself for marriage, I would respect her choice and not deride her for it, but I would also end the dating relationship in an honest and respectful manner.

That�s pretty much the common attitude right now. It causes me to try really hard not to divulge my feelings on this unless I have to, because I want to get to know the guy and I know as soon as this comes out the dating is over. The whole thing confuses me, because many dating advice books and websites actually say the best way to get married (vice be live-in forever) is to withhold sex. That�s not the reason I�m doing it, for me it�s religious, but I don�t see how these �gurus� can recommend that because once a guy figures out he�s not getting any, he disappears.

On the opposite side of the coin, I actually broke things off with another guy I had dated for about 7 months because it appeared things were heading toward dating for years but no marriage. I told him though I was in no rush to get remarried I would not be happy being in the situation like his previous relationship (8-year live-in). It just didn�t sit well with me to date a guy for a couple years and NOT get married.

I had not told him of my no sex before marriage conviction, but kept the physical to minor things like cuddling so he probably figured it out. I don�t feel bad about that relationship crumbling because I wasn�t really attracted to him anyway, the way I am now, but he was lots of fun and a very impressive man.


"If you will stop feeding your feelings, then they will stop controlling you" -Joyce Meyer