And that is why we have to forgive spouses that have affairs.
I struggle with forgiving my wife's affair partner.
But I feel that I have forgiven my ex wife.
The lords prayer, "as we forgive those who sin against us"

God doesn't say to be a doormat and forget. But judgement belongs to God.

When my wife had her affair I was an emotional wreck. Finally I "let go and let God" takeover and when I admitted it was more than I could handle and handed my problems to Him I felt at peace. Not instant peace, but gradual peace over time