Originally Posted by nscriv
The thing is, it's all very well to to focus solely on the love busters that I am guilty of. The fact that I am candid about that should show that I am serious about doing what I need to. But I'm also not prepared to be the only one making the effort if all that would result in is me being used like a doormat.

A doormat is how you describe your situation right now so how could a change be worse?

Originally Posted by nscriv
I don't think that she is completely withdrawn either. After coming across an article 'buyers, renters and freeloaders' she has many of the characterstics described under freeloader.

Of course she is a freeloader. That is exactly what a withdrawn spouse is.

3 adult children
Divorced - he was a serial adulterer
Now remarried, thank you MB
(formerly lied_to_again)