</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> A tempting treat, leave him wondering why they are set out there so inviting looking. If he likes them as much as you say, it should be hard for him to resist. Good. You want him to want it...... you want him to miss it, then you want him to feel the same for you. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Orchid, we are talking cookies here, aren't we? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> I feel like I'm reading a steamy novel here <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

You are doing so well GC, you go girl.

Steve has requested same to me, to get H to call him. Very similar advice really. I mention it every now and then and try not to push it too much.

USH said you posted a link about a bible story about love. Can you tell me the passage or paste the link?

cya

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Seahorse:
<strong>
Steve has requested same to me, to get H to call him. Very similar advice really. I mention it every now and then and try not to push it too much.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">How has your WH's reactions been, what did Steve tell you to say? Steve told me to "he had a plan" but I am not for sure how enticing this is to WH.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Seahorse:
<strong>
USH said you posted a link about a bible story about love. Can you tell me the passage or paste the link?
</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Plan A from the Bible - bible study based on Corinithians

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by blondblossom:
<strong>Hi G_C,

could you give me your email address? I wanted to email you privately. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />
take care
bb</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">you and anyone else that wants to email me can use the following:

mb_going_crazy@hotmail.com

Orchid & MGM:
most likely I won't be home when he comes by for him to "ask" about the cookies. He is really a kid at heart, maybe I'm trying to work the old get to mans heart through his stomach!!!

I went out last night and bought some his favorite "snacks". I thought about putting the cookies and the snacks in a bag and leaving it for him. I am pretty sure that he would like that. I also bought a simple card, saying thinking about you, but not a heavy card, SH suggested I do this for a while.

I think the package may deposit into his LB, he loves little gifts, that is his love language.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> <strong>wouldn't it be nice if OW knew he had a book on "building an affair proof marriage" <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Which do you think OW would hate more? Him reading a book on "building an affair proof marriage" or if she caught him reading a book on "building a marriage proof affair?"
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by MaryJanes:
<strong>
do you think OW would hate more? Him reading a book on "building an affair proof marriage" or if she caught him reading a book on "building a marriage proof affair?"
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">thats funny, unfortunately I think there are probably books out there!!

haven't emailed or spoken with WH today at all.

He just called me on my cell (I didn't answer) to tell me to go to mall and look at some sheets & comforters he thought were real cute, he thought I might like them???

What?/////////

????...This gets better and better all the time!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> At this point I'm at a loss as to what to think. Is he just trying to be nice? Is he trying to reconnect? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> I guess I'd keep doing what you're doing, for the time being. Thank him for telling you about the sheets and that you'll have a look at them.

I didn't call him back, I figured that him and his mom were out shopping when he saw them.

Got home from work today, mowed, took a shower, when I got out the shower, he had tried to call the home phone and the cell phone, but did not leave a message on either, this was about 6:45 or so.

I haven't called him back, wonder what he wanted???

Just got the cookies out of the oven, letting them cool, getting ready to make some homemade frosting, probably decorate little pumpkins and stuff on them.

So....I have no clue what time he will be by to pick up his mail, his mom's flight leaves in the morning, by looking at the flights, I am assuming she will leave on a 7:55am flight, meaning he would get her there by 6am for the security and stuff and probably come straight here (about 15-20min from airport) after he drops her off.

So most likely, he will be her before I go to work, I was planning on going in early because I have a dr appt that afternoon, so I will definitely be ready and looking my best, woo hoo!!

He may "kill some time" however and wait to come by but I am assuming he will probably come by as soon as possible so he can drive back down to work.

who knows??

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by going_crazy:
<strong>haven't emailed or spoken with WH today at all.

He just called me on my cell (I didn't answer) to tell me to go to mall and look at some sheets & comforters he thought were real cute, he thought I might like them???

What?/////////</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Ok GC..... go look at those comforters, call your H from the store and say 'Hey it looks great. The lady says these would look good in my room with a 'man' under it, so just give me your credit card #." LOL!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

L.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Orchid:
<strong>Ok GC..... go look at those comforters, call your H from the store and say 'Hey it looks great. The lady says these would look good in my room with a 'man' under it, so just give me your credit card #." LOL!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

L.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Orchid, you are hilarious!!!!! We are both really into collecting scottie dogs and they were comforters with scotties on them. One of our extra bedrooms is the "scottie" room because it has scottie pictures all over it, we had wanted new comforters for that room. The bed is part of a bedroom suit his mom gave us, so if we were to get divorced, he would take it. Already have new comforters for "our" room.

Am I reading between the lines here???

Not hard to see he is trying to reconnect.. he might not even know it.. but he is. He obviously misses you, but has pride and is finding it hard to admit his mistakes.. let him make that love deposit.. I do think it is quite sweet for a man to even think about a comforter.
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />
Hugs, HONEY

G_C,

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">So most likely, he will be her before I go to work, I was planning on going in early because I have a dr appt that
afternoon, so I will definitely be ready and looking my best, woo hoo!! </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">this might sound strange, but would you be able to leave the house before he came????
Just leave him a message and the cookies. Mention a thank you for the "comforters info" and let him know that you appreciated him telling you.
I'm telling you this because I think he has probably had dozens of conversations with his mother. If you ask me, something is going on his mind.

I think it would be good for him, not to see you right after MIL left. Don't ask me why, I can't tell you.
Maybe because he will still feel "strong" and confident from what he and his mother talked about. I'd keep up the telephone contact but I'd wait to see him in person. ( i know this is hard, really I understand) But I also believe that he too will be very excited to see you. Don't think he isn't excited to see you, he is. But back off abit and this will surely get him "wondering".
Just make sure that the house look good and don't forget the "sexy" undies. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

You might want to give this a little time until he has had time to be on his own again. He might really get excited about seeing you.

What I really see is, when you "back off" he does make steps towards you. Do you see this too????? And if he is a "spoiled brat" he will really want what he doesn't seem to be getting.
Step back and keep up the phone contact.

take care of yourself G_C

bb

Thanks Honey & BB,

He hasn't came by yet, if he does I would expect him anytime. If he does get here soon, I plan to be on my way out, with the linger of Realm in the air.

It's hard not to see him,BB!! I have not seen him for 6 weeks in person right now. I didn't ever call him back last night (but he didn't leave a message), so I wonder what he was wanting??

I think he is flirting with you. I think he wants to see if he still has feelings for you. I'd say flirt back; be playful if not a little saucy... and don't get hung up about VD tests if something happens.

- relate

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by relate:
<strong>I think he is flirting with you. I think he wants to see if he still has feelings for you. I'd say flirt back; be playful if not a little saucy... and don't get hung up about VD tests if something happens.

- relate</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Relate: we shall see, yes, I can flirt back!!. As far as VD tests go, I do want to be safe, there are diseases out there with no symptoms that can cause a woman to become infertile such as chlamydia

GC,

Man, it looks like things have picked up for you. I am sorry that I haven't been here lately. I hope that this is the first step in the recovery process, but don't get you hopes up to high. I am looking forward to what happens shen he comes over.

Indy

<small>[ October 10, 2002, 08:30 AM: Message edited by: INDY_357 ]</small>

G_C,

take it slowly...........please for your sake. I knew, you were going say it hard not to see him. But if only you could think the other way around. It hard for him too!!!!!!!!
He's gotta crave for you. He's gotta really want it. He's gotta constantly "have to think" about you. And you gotta set the time when it is right.
I'm sorry that I am not saying what you might want to hear. But it now up to you to change your past reactions. And in the past you were always "there" when he was calling.
You've invested so much time and effort. But this is only my opinion, you know your situation better.

What is a "VT?" or what ever others were talking about.? Sorry I guess I've been in Europe too long, to know this. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

take care and hugs
bb

Indy: thanks for checking in, I wouldn't say anything has really happened, but it is encouraging that he at least has not mentioned the divorce word for 6 weeks now!

Blondblossom:
You must be little angel, because he did not come by. BTW, VD means Venereal Disease.

I did end up calling him on the way to work this morning, since he had called me 3 times yesterday and I didn't respond!! I just said, "hey, I got in late last night and saw you called, didn't want to wake you up".
He told me that he wanted to make sure that I got his voice mail concerning the sheets and comforters and for me to go look at them while they were on sale. I told him I would when I had the chance, I'm sure they will still be on sale (dept stores always have sales)

anyway, I asked if he had already took his mom to the airport, he said he had, which means he must have taken her really early then went to work.

I then told him I had gathered his mail and its on the counter and had a little something for him as well, he kinda got excited, and said "a present", I said, no, just somehting (hee,hee make him wonder).

He then said he would probably pick it up tonight (don't know if that will be before or after I get home from work, I didn't ask), I said that was fine.

he then said, we will talk later, I was just kind of like "okay?" He didn't really say anything, but his voice was kind of encouraging, like it wasn't bad or anything. Does that make sense?

G_C,

did you just notice now that I'm an "angel?" <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

It's ok what he told you and it does sound positive but I somehow miss him really "craving" for you.

He sorta seems to be playing a game with you.
I don't think it is very polite what he is doing. He calls, says that he will come and doesn't.
He seems to do this quit often with you and you always go for it. Sorry, I don't want to sound negetive, I'm surely not. I'm just noticing this.
Remember always what SH told you. Stick with your plan. You are doing a great job. Just hold back.
It a very pleasant situation that you are able to talk with one another and it's fantastic that he does seem to think about you. I really liked his concern for you with the "comforter".
But this is just a little step. He hasn't said anything about your relationship and I believe it going to take alot more time.

Why are you talking about VD??? Are you expecting to "sleep" with him when he comes around???? Are you thinking that you two are ready for this? I just don't understand. Would you explain this to me, please, if you want to.

One thing came to my mind. Have you thought about moving some furniture in the "scottie" room. Just to make it look different? You might want to start with that and then just "notice" that you can't do that on your own. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> How about leaving him a note to ask him if he could maybe (when he is there and has the time) to move bed/ or whatever from wall a to wall b. You tryed and you just can't! Just mention that he doesn't have to, if his time is short and that you will have no problem if he doesn't have the time, it was just a question. Tell him that you want to decorate the room differently and when you find the time, you really want to look at the comforter. You just want to make the room look different before you get that.

G_C, this might get him thinking. I know it is only "moving furniture" but he hasn't been home for so long. I mean he's been there yes but officially only to pick up his mail, never officially to enter a room. or? He'd be getting your permission and therefore he'd probably feel confident enough to look around more. He might start to get the feeling of "being home" when he is dealing with this.
Hope you understand. He will have the opputurnity to look around and see different changes around the home and he will be looking. I'm sure he will even start to miss his home while he is doing this. He might even feel good that he can do this for you. But I don't know your H, I just know that my H feels good when he can do these kinda things for me.

When my H realizes that I just don't have the "muscles" like he does, he feels good and he feels prowd.
I hope you can relate with what I'm saying. This is sorta a little step to make him feel abit "confident" about himself". He might even feel "needed" and for sure he will feel "positive". (unless he hates moving furniture <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> ) Oh, ya another idea. In case you decide to do this, don't forget to put a freshly washed "sexy undie" under the bed. Just make it look as if the cat carried it there! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

take care of yourself G_C and I'm thinking about you alot these days.
If I really was an angel, I know what I would do. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

bb

BB,

he didn't say he was coming by, I just assumed he would, so its really no big deal that he didnt!!

As for VD, "Relate" brought that up, thats why I responded to the question, I am not even thinking about that right now, much more important things!!

As for the scottie room, its already filled with furniture and stuff!! Our house is about 4 years old and filled!