</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I noticed you mentioning on one of the other threads that you took your WS through the finances of separation- EXCELLENT. Those numbers are rarely pretty. I don't call that "education" I just call that looking at reality!</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I did not find this to be true. Separation merely means there is a shift of resources from one household (the family) to another (the WS and OP). Assuming the OP is working, the WS often is MUCH better off financially. In my case, I was a SAHM, and my H was supporting 8 people, including himself, on his income, so approximately 1/8 of the after tax income was available to spend on himself - probably less, because we spent more on the kids than on ourselves. The child support guidelines only require him to pay about 40% of his income - I realize that is before taxes, but with six kids, our taxes were never very high. He ends up keeping a far higher percentage of his income, plus he gets to share expenses with the OW. Meanwhile, even though I went back to work, the kids and I live just above the poverty line, while he has changed careers and taken a very low paying job, but can still afford to drive a $34,000 car.

Many men leave for that reason, in order to get out of supporting their children. That is why so many leave just as their kids are starting college - they realize how much it is going to cost, and don't want to have to pay. In many states, they are not required to contribute to their kids' college education, and even where they are, how much they have to contribute is often not clearly specified.