I agree with Katie Scarlett and others who say he's bluffing and won't tell your parents. This guy is a creep. I hope you can find a way to contact his W. I wouldn't concentrate all my efforts on telling her though. You need to take care of yourself first.

Wait a second; I’m confused. Your title line says LOVER ending the affair, never once do you mention that he ended it. You talk about how you know you need to end and stay away from him. Which one is true? If he ended it you really need to examine your motives for telling.

Endeavor, I'm the OP; his lover. I am the one who ended the affair, not him. I was speaking of myself in third person.

Good news!! Test results are negative, so this is one less thing with which I have to deal. I cried when I talked to the nurse on the phone this morning. God has been merciful on me, and I truly don't deserve it at all. I'm so thankful that his wife and children are not in physical danger.

As for taking it one day at a time, that's what I'm trying to focus on right now. I'm trying to surround myself with friends who can meet the emotional needs I was trying to have fulfilled through this affair. To date, I've shared it with three good friends and my therapist. I need to be held accountable, for while at this point I can't imagine ever sinning like this again, I need to make sure I'm on the right track to becoming healthy psychologically, spiritually, and emotionally.

Ladysing, your words are so comforting. Thank you for caring as much as you do with your thoughtful posts.

Zephyr,
I am so thankful that your tests were negative. God is merciful and you show true repentance regarding this awful mess. As a betrayed spouse, this post was honestly hard for me to read, but I could feel your emotion and felt that maybe I could offer a bit of help. I am thankful that I was able to in a small way.

You are doing the right thing by surrounding yourself with friends who can help you meet your needs. You made a bad decision, who has not? We are not here to judge and I thank God that you found this site and have learned something as a result. I don't believe that you will turn down that path again. Are you involved in a church group or fellowship? If not, I would suggest that you look into that as a source of companionship and spiritual growth. Peace to you! Ladysing