J.R.:

Good stuff for CG!

I posted to your latest thread last night. Please give us an update on your sitch when you can!

-Qfwfq

wantmypookey.....
1) Is the M worth saving?....
I once believe it was worth it but now I question it. Is it worth it to go back to someone who has treated me oh so bad. I bounce back and forth about this question. Lately I have been thinking less and less it is worth it. I want to be happy again and I am not sure I can be that way unless my wife does a 180 from where she is at.

J.R...
Yes I am still down when I see my wife because I see the person that is causing that pain with in me. However my wife does see the things that I am doing such as me going and seeing Dave Matthews and Tim Reynolds in concert. Me taking a kayak class, me working out, etc..... She and I like Dave Matthews very much and she knows that I am going to the Gorge in Washington to see Dave play in concert and she has always wanted to do that and I am going to live that because I want that. So in some ways she does see a lot of happiness in me but at the same time it is hard to fake being happy around her. In a lot of ways she is sort of the enemy now causing that unhappiness. For once I want to start takeing the steps to start making me happy again in life. I don't deserve this nor does anyone else that is in my position.

I just want to be happy again and I haven't in a long time. I want to start that journey to get there some day. It may be a long road but I feel I need to start that journey. My wife told me she is going to file when she has the money so I think I need to start being prepared for her walking away forever. It seems like it is all over but the crying for me. It would a take a miracle to change all of this.

Thanks for the advice. Thanks for helping me feel better about myself....

CG,

I just read a very thorough post in the recovery forum. If memory serves me right, it is called "get over it". Although it may seem oversimplified, it may shed some light on some of the things that are on your mind. You and your W got marrieed for a reason, right? Is it possible to try to go back to the good ol' days when the 2 of you were happy and in love? I KNOW that in order to make a M work (especially well) it is going to take the both of you working very hard at it.

I don't know how much this may help, it is getting kind of late and my brain shut down a little while ago.

Good Luck, try to hold your head up.

I Love My Pookey (around the world and back 100 times)