Dia-g
I usually approach the suckiness of affairs with acknowledgement of the emotional pain caused to all parties....OM/WS/BS..
I have to tell you the more you reveal about your OM...the less I "like" him and the less I believe that he has the ability to care or nuture anyone on any type of real basis...
Prior to me starting up with OM and prior to my H's D-day, OM would flirt endlessly with me for years and I always blew him off, thinking "no! It's not right. I'm not gonna do that to H" That ONE paragraph speaks volumes about the type of person your OM is....we all encounter other people that we find attractive...all the time...but out our own respect for ourselves and ESPECIALLY that person's marriage and vows...we don't put them in positions in which they have to blow us.
his action speak of not respecting your husband or you for that matter in the things that you value and what you need in your life to be happily married which is the support of friends ...
marriage ceremonies themselves are public ceremonies not for the good party and some cake...but because htey are the time that friend and families show and offer their support for our marriage....
people that care about us...the inner us...don't flirt with us...
One time along time ago when he was flirting with me I told him I couldn't do this ( this was before we started up) and he got mad at me and reminded me of how H did it to me and why should I be good to him and he doesn't deserve me and I just got pissed thinking about what he said and let it stew for a few months before I crossed over the line. And so what your OM believes you "deserve' is really good mind blowing sex...(the easy part of a relationship) with none NONE of the real stuff...
the hard stuff...
Last night he was being kinda mean to his GF in front of me. She tried to kiss him and he actually backed away from her saying how he felt sick! He talks mean to her when I'm there. this is where it's headed...innocent girlfriend getting deeply hurt...for what..believing in her boyfriend...trying to be affectionate...
are you friends with her as well...
is it even more exciting (the sex part) knowing personally the people you are hurting...??
Or are you gonna come back with how the fact you are "friends" adds to your "knowledge' this is wrong...but still are the victim to change this...
But still I think how can I just DUMP OM??? You say that so harsh as if I should be to him. this other man..is the exact type of person who will hurt you...
he won't go aways easily..
he's laying ground work that hurts his girlfriend...and will blame you when their relationship fall apart...
he will threaten to tell your husband...and hurt your children...
he doesn't possess the ego to believe you could leave HIM !! ??
He has pursued you for a long time with an agenda to get you..
he's not gonna let go...
He doesn't care about YOU and your pain...someone who pursued you when first married...
someone who claims to be a friend to your husband...
I think you are in more trouble than you realize...or perhaps you do and have just built this really strong facade...
ark <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />
