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Steve, it sounds like she is changing her attitude quite a bit towards you. Do you sense the same thing?
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it is hard to say, I kept telling her last night I did not want to talk to her if she had anything to say to me then talk to sis in law, she is made at me and blames me for my brother confornting OM.
NOte, she has always told people I am not giving her money and telling me she dosent have any. I noticed the car was spotless so I called the carwash and asked for a recipt, just by chance. sure enough she paid 135 dollars for car wash plus carpet shampooed.
her attitude, she makes no effort to contact me or sis in law, a friend of mine who knows my wife and I see my wife on Tuesdays when she drops the girls off at gymnastics. the wife does not know this person. My friend told my sis in law that my wife looks so mad all the time. he said she looks bad, tired etc.
how should I play my cards?
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Steve, I would just keep being as civil as possible and playing it by ear but I am curious about something. Do you think she is trying to engage you? Or is she still hostile? If she wanted to see you would she tell you?
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I think she really dosent know what to think, She does at times try to engage me. I told her last night to quit harassing me, she did not like this and said it was me harassing her. I dont talk to her except when she answers the phone, I ask to speak with the kids. some times she says sure!hold on real smart [censored] like, I ignore this other times she says let me tell you something bla bla bla, mel did oyu read the other actions since you last post, Hope i did not offend you with that one post.
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Steve, no, I wasn't offended at all! The things you told me made me wonder if she even thinks adultery if wrong. If she doesn't think its wrong, then Houston, we have a problem! See what I mean? I just can't seem to get a FEEL for her or your situation and am trying to understand it.
Do you think she knows it wrong and is just rationalizing it because she is addicted to this guy? What are her views normally on adultery?
What do you think would happen if you sort of flirted with her the next time you call over there and she is pleasant?
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From what she has told me in the past she is dead set against cheating on your spouse.
As I said she never acted crazy,slutty etc around Om, he would see us out and she would have a low cut shirt on etc. never seemed to be a problem. she never went skinny diping etc around him, she did not like myself or friends talking about it around him.
She told my friend last week that when ever I touched her it made her sick, do I dare try and flirt, she said she never loved me but stayed with me so her mom would not think she was a failure.
How would I try and flirt, any ideas.
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I have to tell you how to flirt??? lol! C'mon, Steve, surely you have flirted with her? You are too funny. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">She told my friend last week that when ever I touched her it made her sick, do I dare try and flirt, she said she never loved me but stayed with me so her mom would not think she was a failure.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">That sounds like revisionist history to me. Did she ACT LIKE she didn't love you and couldn't stand for you to touch her all these years?
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no, she never acted lke she did not want me to touch her, like i said sex 3 or 4 times per week. She started it 95% of the time. The reason I asked about the flirting thing is maybe I am gun shy. Guess i dont want anything thrown back in my face.
Plus how can I flirt if i am in plan B?
is there any chance of talking on the phone, this typeing stuff is hard, plus I forget what I want to say sometimes. I understand if you say no.
what do think about the car wash, person of few words.
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Steve, when you talk to her on the phone the next time, try just being nice to her and see how she reacts. I am trying to determine if she is softening up towards you.
As far as the things she told your friend about not loving you, that is all typical WS fog talk. They all exaggerate and lie about how bad it was in a weak attempt to justify the affair.
Sorry I can't talk on the phone.
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Should I tell her something like, you looked nice the other day when I saw you, She may think Im sarcastic since she has lost weight. She was
working the sno cone booth which we could not find, should I tell her sorry we could not find it, we asked and they did not know either.
She already jumped down my throat because ny brother confronted the OM. I defended myself and told her if she wanted to tell my brother something then she should call him and leave me out of it.
I feel stuck right now, dont want to make another wrong move in her eyes,
should I talk about our daughters,
or comment on my wife.
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Steve, just see what happens if you tell her she looked nice. I want to see what her reaction is.
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Mel, I was speaking with my daughters and when we
were finished I asked ot speak with Mommy, My daughter said Mommy daddy wants to speak with you, she said tell him I dont want to talk. I then said tell Mommy I want to tell her something real quick, My daughter told her that. My wifes reply was tell Daddy I dont want to ttalk to him because we always argue when we talk.
I told My daughter I just wanted to tell Mommy she really looked nice this past weekend.
My daughter said she would tell mommy this.
Whats Up?
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Do you always argue when you talk? Will your daughter tell her you said that?
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yes my daughter will tell her, I dont think we always argue, the last time she was mad because of what my brother had done to Om. She told me you better tell your brohter bla bla bla, I told her to call him if she had anything to say to him.
I donot yell or raise my voice. When my wife answers I will tell her again if you think I should or is there another plan.
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Just see how she acts the next time you call over there. I am curious to see if there will be any response. Is she still seeing the OM?
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I think so, while Im at work, I know this past weekend he had a babysitter for his kids while I had our kids, seems very strange. Also how would my wife know what my brother done, my daughter was there but she did not understand what was done ohter than we did not talk to him.
I feel they still talk at the very least
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Called for the kids, wife will not answer the phone, I kinda expected this.
Mel, please read the above post to questions you asked last night
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I called and spoke to the kids, they said they were out late last night with the wife and was
over at the neighbors all day today.
I asked my daughter if she told Mommy I said she looked nice this past Sat. when we saw her. My daughter said she told mommy, I asked what Mommy said and she told me mommy said "whatever"
Ok Mel what now.
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Ok, I guess she didn't respond to it. I would just keep moving forward, Steve, and stay in Plan B. There is really nothing you can do, except try to put pressure on her via the court proceedings. Has child support been set? What about custody arrangements?
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While talking to my daughter last night I found out that she had broken out in a rash, wife told daughter to tell me it was because of some med. she had given her. I told daughter not to say what mommy said, I told her Mommy needed to tell me what happened.
I called this am to check on my daughter and wife did not answer the phone, I left a message telling wife I was calling to check on ****** to please call and let me know how she was.
Should I try and tell wife instead of having daughter tell her? Should I write her a letter?
I really dont think the wife gives a S*** about this plan B, right now I think the only person it affects is me.
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