Mimi,

This is what I meant. Maybe I didn't say it right. What I mean is, if someone says something to me, trying to give me advice, and I think it over, and pray about it, and look in the scriptures to see if this is how God views it, then I go ahead & follow it. If not, then I don't. I do it God's way. Even if that means it'll be harder. He never said the road would be easy, like I said before.

I really appreciate all the advice that is given to me on this board & the support and encouragement I receive. I believe that God works through people and I have found many people on this board that the Lord is working through to help others facing the same problem or that just need an encouraging word, some comfort. I do believe God lead me to this site and to the people that I have become friends with on here.

I thank you, God, for sending these people into my life and for always being the leader, guiding me in my decisions. Amen.

Thank you so much, Mimi, for the guidance and support you're showing to me. I am trying to follow the MB principles as closely as possible. Thanks to MelodyLane, TooMuchCoffeeMan, Walking, JustJ, TryingtosaveMyMarriage, Lupolady, singleguy, gentle, steadfast&committed and of course, The Harleys. There have been so many I am afraid I have left someone out and I do apologize for that. If I seem like I have been ungrateful for the advice, I do apologize for that too.

Hope all of you can see changes in your situations in 2004 or find a little bit more happiness communing with God.

Standing I haven't visit the prayer group but I'm sure I could benefit. As hurt as I am by my W's actions I can somehow remain objective. I have a friend who is in a 3 year affair that his W is aware of. He can't make a decision either way and it is eating him up. This is a man I have tremendous respect for. And I figure if this could happen to him it can happen to anyone. But the point I wanted to make was, when I asked him if he wished this never happened he responded; "no, I wish it didn't have to happen".
And I relayed that message to my W who obviously was anxious to agree with it. But if we're honest with ourselves we have unwittingly contributed to sending our spouse in this direction. I'm not justifying it but being honest about it. Let's face it, my W's refusal to end her EA is certainly pushing me into an A. I hopefully will never go down that road but no doubt her lack of commitment to the M certainly leaves me more vulnerable than if things were different between us.