My Plan Me:

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> I went for a job interview and it felt real good. This job will definitely keep me busy. It will also stop me from brooding over what's happened in my life. It is also an avenue for me to meet new people.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> I have the freedom to spend whatever time I want to spend with God. Sometimes I just sit quietly in His presence because I want to. I couldn't do this with FWH around.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> I have to set a plan on managing my money because I have to be totally self-reliant now. I have to set aside $$ for the divorce and other paperwork that comes along <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> When I am down, I still have someone to hug: my warm and furry cat! She's been absolutely loving. It's just her and me now.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> When I am back on my feet, I will continue to do things I always love: travel.

Hmmm. I may try yoga and meditation. I've heard many good things about them, but never did them.

I am finding it's the simple things I enjoy:

* Enjoying dinner and a glass of wine while kicked back with my feet up on the sofa in our formal living room--total silence--no TV blaring from the other room.

* Piddling around in my teeny garden boxes trying to make green things stay green and not turn brown.

* Walking around the mall all day Saturday and not feeling guilty because I wasn't taking care of something at the house.

* Reading my Bible whenever I want, or praying, and doing so again without the blaring TV or someone (WH) picking at me.

* Fixing the types of things I like to eat without worrying about pleasing others. WH is not here to eat it, and with the kids being teens, they seem to stop at McD's with their friends before I get home and so usually aren't hungry anyway.

* Getting my fingernails professionally done. I've never done this before (and may not be able to afford it for long). WH wouldn't have cared and has rolled his eyes at me now for doing it, but it makes me feel more feminine.

* Redecorating the house little by little as I can afford it.

I need to start an exercise program too, not to lose weight (because I'm already too thin) but to tone up. I just haven't found the motivation for it yet. I'm too busy with all the other things right now. (That's right, LL--keep finding reasons to justify your lack of exercise! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> )

LL

Well sounds good so far. Let's all reclaim the person we once were. Today I have been playing catch up. Was on vacation for 10 days, and there is lots to do around the house.

no whining: Promise Beleiver:! but I still turn down hanging out with guyfriends.. kinda sad because before I would because I was secure in my relationship. Everyone knew upfront I was married...so need to try to lure me into anything 100% dedicated, but now I am not.. so all my guyfriends that wants me to come for drinks and talk.. I turn down.. although they say they missed. I am focus on the M thing.

ANyways what I did for me.. this weekend I went to the country side... H was there.. we picked flowers.... I took a breather....and just completely let go into the sun.. my skin is dark as chocolate right now.. but oh well. I like it <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> My mom in law redyed my hair.. and now I have them in long braids.. everyone says I look great! It's a boost of self confidence.. I even had a lady coming up to me and say.. "I must say you're a very beautiful woman." H was there.. and smiled.... He has been so attached me lately..

Oh well.. all this was for me.. not for my H~!

Then I bought myself couple of flowers for my bedroom.. real flowers to put on my windows... I bought fresh peas even with the leaves. I am always for the healthy eating... to keep me up because I have to go under surgery for benign polyp....intestinal problems.. stress adds to it. More doctor visits.

well that's it.. I think and yes, I'm still jamming. waiting for the job response.. I'm posting everywhere... life is funny as hell.. I intend to chill
just chill.....no stress at 22, I still want to look 15 <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

What I did in the weekend was: bought some vinle sheets to cover the chairs in the kitchen and finished 2/3 of them. Dig worms with S for fishing. I still could not handle the worms, but S was able to pich them up. Got a big one, will clean it today and eat it. Life will be good with or without WH.

Good for everyone!!! Lostnhurt - You are braver now. What kind of fish did you get?

Believer, I don't know what kind of fish it is. According to WH, it is some kind of bass, either a small mouth or big mouth, I can't tell. The mouths are pretty big to me. But I am going to clean it now.

I did some other thing make myself feel good today: mailed a check to the Children Network Foundation. Rode the bike to the bank to deposit a tax return check. Every little bit counts.

I hope your first day back to work is great.

Believer, thanks for starting this thread. I've been over in recovery whining like crazy. Getting lost in the aftermath of this A. So it's good to think positively, since I used to be quite a positive person.

Just have to tell Tinman if you read this, I LOVE PLAN ME! I want to start seriously implementing it, and the heck with all these other plans.

I've been walking regularly. The last 2 days I've doubled my walking time to release some of my anger. It helps.

I started doing my pilates tape a few weeks ago, but stopped. I hope to begin doing that workout again. Began working out with weights, but have gotten lazy. I will work out with weights 3 times a week. Goal: have great looking arms.

The other day I decided to try a self-tanner. Used one last summer and ended up with a lovely striped face. This time I found one with color, so you can see where the lotion is going. So I'm looking kind of good with my fake tan.

Today I finally gave myself a quick manicure. Painted toes and fingernails pink. Looks good with my fake tan body.

I began listening again the past few nights to my meditation tape which is supposed to help me clear my chakras. God only knows that they sure need clearing out now.

Called shrink last night at 11;30 pm asking if she could see me this week. I realize I need something in this recovery process that I'm not getting, specifically from H. My plan for this week is to talk to shrink and talk to Steve Harley. I've wanted to talk to Steve with H. That was our plan. Tonight, during my anger speed walking, I realized I want to talk to him alone. I am determined to find some clarity about what I want concerning this M.

I'm going with SIL this Sunday to hear a speaker who deals with spiritual issues. SIL invited me. Any help or ideas I can get in the siritual dept., I'll take.

I have always had the desire to get a reading from a gifted psychic. Someone recommended this person to me a month ago. I'm going to contact this person tomorrow.

I definitely need to start having fun. Don't really know what that is anymore, but I am determined to find out.

I have to start psyching myself into studying for my licensure exam. If it weren't for the A I would have taken that test in 2003. I can't let the stupid A hold me back from a career I spent 4 yrs. to achieve. I will study and pass that exam this summer.

I will get the job of my dreams this Fall, 2004!

I will do a better job praying for all the people who have prayed for me, and all of you MB friends who have kept me sane.

I will take the time every day to think of at least one thing I am grateful for. Today I am grateful for Believer and her wonderful Plan ME post. Love Ya Believer! You're the greatest! CV

Great thread!

I am reviving my prayer life.

I restarted my exercise program.

I am decluttering my house. (11 boxes went to charity this week, and lots of stuff went in the trash.)

I am buying things I want without consulting WH. (I bought a Roomba and I love it.) Next a digital camera and a cell phone, when I figure out which kind I want.

I am going back to playing the piano.

I am making the ABSOLUTE MOST of this summer for me and my kids.

I have no work or school so I will be with them 24/7.

*days at the beach

*Lots of amusement park trips (we are roller coaster freaks (the real kind) LOL)

*dinners on the deck

*lunch with Dad once a week

*HAVE FUN!

And on a constructive note:

*refinish kitchen cabinets