LOL <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
Binder,
That is a funny one.However,I am feeling deep guilt and remorse for trashing Torontonians? for being evil homewreckers.LOL Infidelity knows no boundaries EH?
Anyhoo,I have to say that most days are good for me as opposed to the other way round many months ago.I truly feel reconciled with the fact that I may be a D'd lady soon.It took me a while to get there but I realized that whatever my WH is going through is out of my control.I have to be able to go on for my children and myself and have a happy life without him in it if I am to survive.I have spent some time here spouting how important a marriage is but it's only one aspect of our lives.
We have to have other areas that fulfill us and give our lives meaning such as our children,hobbies,volunteer work,sports,whatever.Our lives cannot be wrapped up solely in our marriages because if it fails,we are left with nothing to build from.
What has happened to me,just to share,is that throughout this whole ordeal,I have come to realize that I am just more of ME than I ever was before.It solidified all my values,beliefs and feelings about who I am,what I want in life and what is important to me and what I expect of others who are in my life.This includes my WH who is showing me all the opposites of how I would want a man to treat me.
Granted,my WH had treated me well before but gradually over time he changed.I know that.I gave and gave and he took and took until all that I was was not enough for him.He found himself feeling enititled to more of whatever he felt was missing.An unrealistic image of a perfect relationship outside of his already married self.It's a far cry from what he thought he had in Toronto back in October to where he is now.A lot has changed as reality came seeping in to his life.
I just wanted you to know,that although Plan B doesn't always yield the results we *want,it may yield the results we *need.Putting complete faith in God's divine order is one way which has helped me to see that.Giving it up to God helps me to deal with this unspeakable act of Infidelity and helps me be closer to God and all HIS divine blessings.I am not an overtly religious person by any means but I am even more "spiritual" than before.
When we stop trying to force or envision a specific ending to our dilemma is when we are OPEN to what God has in store for us.It is,many times,not what we think it is or should be but may be what is best.We have the gift of choice though and through that gift we have the ability to lead happy,healthy lives."Life isn't complicated,we make it that way".
Food for thought I suppose.See you around the board.
O <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />
