Thanks for the list. I will print it out and do my best to stick with it. Why did I have to talk to him last night????? Ugghghghggh! I was doing ok yesterday. How do I get over this lonliness. Even when I'm with my friends I still feel it??? This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. How does anymone get over the anger and resentment towards WS? I can't imagine.
My H said that he can't even imagine being intimate with me...he doesn't think of me in that way. Translation???????

I haven't yet gotten the hang of this Fog talk.

Thanks for the list. I will print it out and do my best to stick with it.
This is not how the "list" should be used. It is not something you check off and do each one.
The list is simply ideas to consider doing.
If you are doing something on the "list" (or something not on the list) and getting positive results, you should continue to do it.

TR I am better today thanks. My car is still bent though !

Went bowling with WW & kids today - was nice but I realised that I couldn't bear to give her to another man, not yet anyway. I will do what I need to do.

I have been too much of a pushover so far. Need to behave more confidently, less 'desperately'.

Great post these 180s thanks.

Be strong TR. This crap has happened to us, we can't worry it into it not having happened.

Tree, my H didn't think he was attracted to me anymore. Within a few weeks of firing oW he wanted intimacy with me and was attracted to me. Fog, fog , fog. He replaced you with someone else. The only way he can begin to SEE you again is to get rid of her. The WS loses their memory of what they had with their S. If they convince themselves that the M sucked, they never really were in-love, what they have with the OP is real love, than the A is justified.

Believe me, I still keep trying to understand all of this. It is beyond me. But the words these WSs say are all the same. After d-day H came to MB and read about the dynamics of an A. He told me later that he was reading it to prove that what he had with OW was real. However, when he saw how cookie cutter these As are it made him wonder if his A was just a fantasy. He couldn't accept it yet, but it made him question, and caused him to not just write our M off.

Do your friends know about the A? It might be time for you to get some support. CV

I just told one of my close friends this morning. She knows my H wll too and was shocked. The hard part for me is that my son starts baseball in a couple of weeks and my H coaches. It's going to be so strange for me. My friends will also be there. Something that I always look forwad to (watching my son play ball) now seems like it's going to be strained and not so pleasent. My son is hurting and to see that kills me!!! I don't know if I will ever have it in my heart to forgive my H for what he has done to not only me but our son.
Ok.....I know that right now I shouldn't even be thinking of forgiveness. Not anywhere close to that so I'll let it go for now...

It just really hurts to hear the person that I've loved for so long to look me in the face and say they don't love me the same way. That is really hard!!!!

I don't see him letting go of OW right now. He keeps saying that she has lots to offer and she would marry him. He told her that he didn't want to get married again and doesn't love her. He doesn't love anybody. He says he's found peace within himself but how can you be at peace when you have casued so much pain? Fog!!!!! FOG!!!!! FOG!!!!! I have to keep reminding myself of that!!!!!!!

Ok.....I feel a little better....Guess what I just did??????
I cleaned out my H closet. I took all his clothes, shoes, underwear, socks, belts....everything...and put them all in the garage. I'm going to use his closet for me!!! I need more room anyway and he's not living here so it's only fair. I also plan on removing all of his books and anything that reminds me of him. I feel better now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Are you at least putting them into a bag or a box (not just tossing them into the garage)?

As much as you'd probably like to do this <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> , it's not something you should do.

Yea, I put them in bags and neatly folded everything and put them all in a corner in the garage. I would like to throw them all in with the trash tomorrow but I know that's what my H would expect me to do so I did the opposite.
It's kinda nice having his closet. I have more room for my stuff. I doubt he will be back over here for a while anyway. If he is I won't be around.

TR thats inspired activity. What a culture shoick that will be when WH finds out.

If it empowers you it is good ! I can't do that as my WW is still in my house ( in body and fog anyway!).

I am stronger today, if only for a while after my lowest point ever yesterday.

May we both only move onwards and upwards from this point today, dear TR {{{TR}}}

Bob, I hope so! I am feeling very angry today. I just can't believe the things my H said to me last night. It's got to be Fog talking. He was just plain mean and so uncaring.
I'm pissed that he's getting a second job so that he "can have his own money" ...his words. What about me and our son? I'm starting a business with my friend and I will use that moeny to pay MY own bills and take care of myself. Since he will be making way more money than me then he can be responsible for paying for things for our son. Of course I would pay for anything for my son but my H needs to know that he sitll has responsabilities. I am just so angry!!!!!!!!
I guess being angry is better than crying al day right? I'm sure tonight the sadness will hit me all over again. I pray that it doesn't!!!
So, you're doing better today Bob?