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I have been journaling some of the best Fog babble. Allow me to share with you my friends. Please laugh, my WW may just be a bit embarrassed when I show her these in future times. "I spent years doing stuff for everybody else ! This Affair was MINE and you just resent me enjoying myself" "I don't have ANYTHING private anymore ! You don't have a trusting bone in you do you ?" ( angrily when she found I had discovered her love letters and secret cellphone) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> "OM is a lovely man. You'd like him if you only got to know him" <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> "we never planned to have sex it just happened "( six times after booking a motel for the afternoon and after spending $80 of my money on sexy underwear) " I have never loved you as a wife should love a husband. I have only ever loved OM " ( yep, not in the 22 years of passion are real love we spent, we never had a passionate moment, nor a glance of real love ! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> ) " We didn't have sex, we made love. you should recognise it was a beautiful thing. You shouldn't be upset by my thongs and frillies" <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> "That's it ! You have thrown away your last chance of EVER saving our marriage !" ( response to my exposing fully to OM GF - 2 weeks ago - she still be here br'a !) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> "well done ! OM and I can be happy together now its out in the open ! OM will leave his GF for me !" ( WW ten minutes after the above babble. Like I said, dude, WW still be here br'a) " Kids are resilient - OM says divorce was good for his kids - made them stronger" not even funny !!! " He is trying to calm her down so she will be more reasonable when he leaves GF for me " ( WW after OM desperately denied WW to his GF and begged to reconcile despite OM GF instiantly offering to split everything down the middle financially ! HAHAHAHA ! LOL ! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> the best one yet ! "Its not the size or the technique, its the love that made it special to be with him" - WW admitting that OM was no love rocket. Maybe a cherry bomb with a short fuse.... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> " I know what you're trying to do you know - trying to buy me off by being as nice as ever. It won't work !" ( after I bought WW a bouquet) " OM is a better man than you in every area ! he is the opposite to you " . The nicest complement that anyone has ever paid me. More when I find them ! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <small>[ August 25, 2004, 03:18 AM: Message edited by: Bob Pure ]</small>
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">"OM is a lovely man. You'd like him if you only got to know him" </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Where have I heard this before? Oh, yeah...when my husband brought the OW home for me to meet her, so we could become friends. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> Nice list, Bob...I hope she comes out of the fog soon and retracts some of these statements.
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<img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />
Did you shoot him in the head when he did that ? The kindest thing to do surely ?
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Its amazing what comes out their mouths.
My WH told me: It was God's will that brought him and the OW together and that God is taking him away from me.
Its amazing I never knew God was into breaking up marriages these days. Two marriages were destroyed because the A. My WH is still in his fog, that's why when I do talk to him I keep it short and simple. I never know what to expect (and believe)what comes from his mouth.
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WOW! What can I say, she is more foggy than the scenes in those Sherlock Holmes mystery special...STOCKTON YARD!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Bob, you're handling this well. It's a life saver that we have the information that gives us the knowledge to understand our WS's and their silly sayings. I'm not a betting man, but when she comes around, notice I said when, because I truly believe things are about to fizzle to a complete halt. OM has already chosen his GF, your W just hasn't accepted the truth yet. Oh my when she finally accepts that she will tumble right into some serious withdrawal and then she's going to feel like a complete IDIOT! I think for you Bob, since your are handling this so valiantly, the true test will be watching her go thru withdrawal and convincing her you can forgive her. I mean seriously she's said some very outrageous things! She sounds like a teenager rebelling against her parents. She actually took your money and brought sexy underwear to wear for her and OM? How does she live that down. Her actions have been so outrageous that your going to have a hard time convincing her that your marriage can get passed all of her disrespectful actions. Not to mention, you don't want to appear weak, she will have to assume responsibility for her poor choices and lack of integrity and just plain meanness <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Bob, you're doing a great job. The fact you posted this and you are able to see it for what it is: Nonsensical babble coming from a very defensive spouse who knows they made a humongous mistake but due their pride she puts up a front only to mask her intense guilt and despair. Hang in there Bob. There are more loops left in this rollercoaster ride, but I think it will end safely and in the end you'll get much more than a some corny stuffed elephant at a cheesey game booth. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Patience and Wisdom.
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FM everyone tells me I am doing great and am brave and strong, my own brother and friends included. Everyone has noticed the change in me: "the inner strength that shines through the new sadness in my eyes "( my brother said). I have noticed no change other than the icy knot around my heart has released some. I can laugh again. I have more patience with my kids than ever before. I have more faith in God than ever before. Some good can come from evil, it seems. No-one can believe my "compassion, bravery, decisiveness and lack of vengeance". THEY would all have thrown the slut out etc etc. No they wouldn't. Not if they loved her like I love her. I don't feel brave or strong. I am just glad to be competent for my family during this crisis. Thank you for your support though FM. It means a lot to me that you care. I too see this A on its last legs. My WW doesn't seem to see it that way however. Its a long road ahead. I hope I am able to stay the course. This is a heroes gig, as I have said before. Where did I put my cape and mask ? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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Oh ! An absolute DOOZIE this morning !: " You're using the kids against me by pretending to be'superdad'. It won't last you know !! They'll see through you !" ROFL ! By supporting my kids teh best I can thru WWs miserableness I am using my kids against her ! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> She be trippin' br'a. !
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Family Matters is spot on, fog speak - best piece of advice given at time was throw away the negative guff, it is said to hurt you ... you gotta understand it ain't the real love of your life talking they are on some kind of mental escape in their heads, keep thinking not true in your own head, keep calm, keep loving, your great, and you know what in the end when your wife wakes up like you said, she may be shocked, deny all that guff, and try to make it unreal, be ready it takes a lot of patience - (I didn't do the best at that)... and time, oh time, months roll on, finally one day, you'll wake up & find love in your arms, a different kind of love. Well done to you keep up the good side of you. Dearest Bob, if only they could see the funny/ridiculous side of their 'justification' My most hurtful & yet absolute ironically stupid statements received would be: 1. "You told me to F... Off - so I did, Thank You For Making Me Do Something I Didn’t Want To!!! You Told Me To Did It – **** Off – So I Did, you can thank me for doing something you asked!" - that came after exposure, & H was angry with me for making him take the deeper plunge of taking his fantasy eejit slapper to a physical level. Oh my,,, I told him do it!! Wow!! ps for any newer BS here he was physically sick afterwards and dissappointed with her actual performance, she wasn’t what he thought underneath the clothes, and surprisingly physically uncompatible – his words. 2. "Maybe she doesn't want to be your friend - your too wrapped up in the kid thing, too f***ing Earth Mother for her tastes" --- ding dong... after suggesting if she was a good friend of his, invite their family, husband, kids et al, around for dinner. 3. "I love you with every fibre of my being, a lot of others are jealous of what we have going here".....Why oh why didn't I understand what/who he was talking about - post one of the nicer family days - she was away. 4. "I feel sorry for her, you would too, if you really knew her, her husband doesn't pay her much attention, and she suffers so badly from low self-esteem".... Pooooor poor, bar stool slapper, aww now don't cry pllleeeasssee. Husband not aware of her existence, wow, hello was that my husband taking about a wife who needed a husband to know she was alive with feelings.... 5. "she rocks my world" to which responded "mine too! (I guess I was a little piqued <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> ) well I was your rock, she just shattered the one our home was built on, and now she looks more like a f...ing earthquake our molten lava trying to kill off a family with love and small children" yikes did I sound judgemental or angry? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> 6. "Sorry Honey, we've got to take our child out of here (hospital - suspected meningitis - hooked up to IVs etc), can't mind child at home tonight, need to go to important end of season night out, sure don't worry darling, your well able to cope, your trained for this kinda stuff <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> and the real doctors are only a phone call away, you know how it is Babe, can't let the lads down now can I, thanks for your support, I do love you, child will be better with you anyway"....need I say more.... logical thinking just evaporates, protective instinct towards family...what is that? ... shifts to self preservation in secret life... the mind and heart boggles. 7. "You made her feel sick on purpose, you heartless *****"...oh dear.. the day I rang her to ask her nicely to step outta the way, how could I??? 8. "You ruined her reputation" - that is my all time fav statement. The married girl with 47 ex lovers, 3 in tow including 2 husbands mine & hers, various kids - one father known for sure, regularly seen shagging in cars - but poor poor innocent, lonely, misrepresented girl... oh did I mention the diseases - no that would just be nasty... now I remember my Mom told me to be nice and guess what...I am nice, too friggin nice... at this point I visualise myself doing the Marge Simpson fummmm...aka mmmmmmmmmmmm - but ever so sweetly. Thanks for the fond memories, but we gotta laugh some time. What tangled webs we weave, when we first set out to deceive. My innocence lost, grown up, a stronger, better person, who has helped a man restore his integrity, self worth, dignity and respect. He wish he could have recognise the damage potential, and not indulged his ego to fall into her planned and well experienced and executed trap. Life is too short for us to dwell, we are living in the surity of today & finding time to laugh...keeping it up Yours Ktulu
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<img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> @Ktulu !!!!! un-be-fricking-lievable fog there darl' ! Love your 'bar stool slapper' description ! You MUST be English ! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Like FM said the knowledge that the Fog Babble comes from below the waist not between the ears is our strength. It would really hurt if I wasn't expecting it.
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Bob Pure The Lights were on but no one was home. Till his darling Wife changed the Wattage!!! Intially little flickers, then slight hints of contant light could be possible. Lots of rewiring, phase testing, finally we got the circuits running well enough to go. Now most folks wear shades <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> near us !!! Keep it up you are doing the right things!!! Ktulu
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"Bob Pure The Lights were on but no one was home. Till his darling Wife changed the Wattage!!! Intially little flickers, then slight hints of contant light could be possible. Lots of rewiring, phase testing, finally we got the circuits running well enough to go. Now most folks wear shades near us !!! Keep it up you are doing the right things!!! Ktulu" ----------------------------------------------- Ktulu - You are TOO cute, my dear <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> Weaver
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Wow! I thought I was the only one God was picking on HD... I got the story that the OW thought God sent my H to her so she and her son could have a good man in their lives. Well as HD said, the God I know isn't into hurting people, or breaking up marriages, or adultery for that matter... can you say mortal sin? Now, I'm not very religious so I don't want to come off as such. But, I do know that God - whoever that is to each person - is about love and forgiveness - not heartache and infidelity. If my H wants to see God's will - look at me. I'm still here. At this point, I might still have forgiveness in my heart...in time.
As they say, to error is human, to forgive, that's a miracle! So to all us miracle-workers, keep your heads up and take care of yourselves!
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We did this over in the Recovery board back in April 2003 you might enjoy reading them too (sound quite a bit the same, go figure) What is the dumbest answer you've heard? way2
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they ar ejust FANTASTIC way 2 ! There HAS to be a MB book of fog published soon. This is the funniest stuff to anyone who has ever heard this cr@pola ! I thought my WW was an expert but she has some way to go yet I see ! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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I rmembered another classic ! WW " I don't believe you never had an affair" bob" I never have" WW " A funny , good looking man like you ? don't give me that holier than thou b*llsh*t ! Just admit it !" bob " I never have " WW " Liar ! " bob "erm....my hovercraft is full of eels" WW " See? You're joking. Its because you've had an affair ! How dare you make me feel guilty when you have had an affair first?" LOL ! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> * wipes tears of laughter away* Also WW " I hope you are guilty for what you are doing to OM GF" bob " I have done nothing to OM GF. Only to people worked together to hurt her and me" WW " We never meant to hurt her. You telling her about the A is what has hurt her. Don't you think the poor girl has enough to contend with at the moment? " LOL ! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Theres a million. i should set up a tape recorder...
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Weaver I wish I was Cute as in clever, or even cute as in adorable, none of this crap would have happened - duhhh moments of self doubt, copping on fast as I type. Okay back to real life living. Anyone hear this one Advance warning please don't be offened the Cu word up till last year it was a word I abhorred. Q. Why did God invent Thrush? A. So women would know what it is like to live with an aggravating c*nt before they marry one. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> In context of our new life that was one of my favourite private jokes two years ago. K out for the day.... sun shining, kids playing etc. etc.
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Bob just caught a glimpse before logged out, remembered:
"Honey it's not that I don't trust you, it's the men that you might meet" - on the very rare occassions that I went out without him.
Wow figure fog talk/accussations can sometimes be insights into their own self without being aware.
See ya
Keep smiling
K
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Unbelievably I heard a Metallica lyric that just about sums up fog ! </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> No more! the craps rolls out your mouth again haven't changed, your brain is still gelatin little whispers circle around your head why don't you worry about yourself instead who are you? where ya been? where ya from? gossip is burning on the tip of your tongue you lie so much you believe yourself judge not lest ye be judged yourself holier than thou you are holier than thou you are you know not </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">
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Hey Bob Have one to add to the list. This is new obviously to me but I think it must be the first of the 'fog' talk Anyway, this morning, got the kids off to school and we are getting ready to leave as well, WW has been obviously thinking about something and looks up at me as I pick my bag up with a VERY annoyed expression and says " If you 'married' people had just let us run our relationship to an end I could feel so much better about it" So us 'married' poeple just said nothing too much and went to work. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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Aussie, life would be SO MUCH easier if we just let 'em screw who they want in peace, right ? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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