</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Helen of Troy </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Didn't that story end with most everyone she loved dead from fighting over her? Somehow I doubt she really loved that, unless she was a sadist. </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">and Cleopatra </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Didn't that story end in mutual suicide or something? </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> come immediately to mind. Then there's Guinnevere,... </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Her "great adventure" was her affair with Lancelot, wasn't it? VERY sympatheticly portrayed, I might add - glorified, even, as in: "they were soul mates, she just married the wrong person" - gag me! (Hmmm...why is there no "gagging" smiley face?)

I actually don't know the stories of the others you mention, but with that as a start...

Have you lost your mind?

<small>[ October 07, 2004, 12:11 AM: Message edited by: johnh39 ]</small>

JL,

I found the book very useful. My favorite aspect was that it encourages compassion for men and how to appreciate our differences. One of the authors points is, the more you appreciate being a woman, the more are capable of appreciating a man.

I've known about the differences between men and women, but didn't know how to apply my knowledge. Does that make sense? For instance, I've always know that a man doesn't want a woman to change him. However, I hadn't realized exactly how offensive that was to men and how easy it is for a woman to break that rule through her natural desire to improve and beautify everything her in her life. DUH.

I read the book very quickly but am now going through it again slowly. The book actually lays out a 7 week plan to help a woman understand and appreciate men and our gender differences. I'm going to start week 1 in the next couple of days. Week 1 is about learning and practicing how to show appreciation to men for being men.

FYI, whenever I'm down about the A or my M and feel helpless, this book actually helps me feel good about myself very quickly.

JL, so now that I've learned men don't like to be fixed, how do I recommend "Wild at Heart" to my H?

Thanks.

Deleted. Will not be reposted.

<small>[ October 07, 2004, 11:14 AM: Message edited by: Just J ]</small>

Thanks

Pep

<small>[ October 07, 2004, 11:34 AM: Message edited by: Pepperband ]</small>

OK - seems my memory of one of the mythic stories referred to is inaccurate - Helen's husband Meneleaus does survive the carnage at Troy, and he gets her back. The person in the story that most clearly made HER the adventure, however, is Paris, the one who stole her from her H. He is not spoken of very highly in the story, to say the least (his countrymen "hated him like death") - there are asome relevent details here: Illiad excerpt summary

Getting outside that particular legendary example and into the present, according to Eldridge, frequently, it is making the woman the adventure that is part of the emotional backdrop for men who have affairs. (I assume the same is true for at least some WWs, too.) But we all know the average lifespan of an affair. It certainly is fun & exciting for both the WS and the OP...for a while. It is just not sustainable. People, whether men or women, need an adventure bigger than themselves.

<small>[ October 08, 2004, 07:09 AM: Message edited by: johnh39 ]</small>

If you read the link I posted above, it is clear that Helen did not "love every minute of it"...unless you call wishing to die and expressing feelings of self-loathing "loving every minute of it"...and that was before she found out her brothers had died in the battle.

H really likes this book.

bump
for old times sake !

Whatever happened 2 Johnh39?

He was cool.

-ol' 2long

This was one of my all-time-favorite MB discussions (you KNOW how I loooove to do a book report)

and today I sort of found it by accident... got it bookmarked now

2Long ... got the email ... all I wanna say is "ick"

bump

I don't know if you bumped that for me, but it stuck right in my heart. That is how I know I failed.

I would love to send that to my wife, but I don't know if it would do more harm than good. I am really lost.

Go to your local bookstore and buy that book instead of sending this topic to your wife.

Read the book.

That is a great book, Eldredge also has a really good DVD series with the same name.

FWH ordered it, I am guessing from his website. We watched it together and it's really great for both the husband and wife to watch it...gives a lot of insight into men and so much more.

Having raised one boy to manhood I agree this is so true! Even my youngest DS who is disabled and non verbal LOVES LOVES LOVES pirates, sword fights, sports and all things MALE. My stepson who I am just getting to know (he is 4) is the same way. My DD thinks he is "weird", I told her he is a boy! He turns all things into swords and ninja fighting tools. I get such a kick out of it!

My DH tried to teach a men's group on this book. One of the elders of the church we attended at that time, poo-pooed it and it was stopped. Why did he poo-poo it? Because his WIFE didn't like the book.

will do

To Still-Crazy

If you'll notice, I started this thread in 2004 :MrEEk:

I can't remember what made me title it this way - something going on with Believer and myself ....

BUT this thread was started to HELP MEN become better husbands. To HELP MEN think about what it means to be a man. It expresses how special I think men are.


This thread is essentially about a wonderful book I read and my H was reading ....

Does this help?

Saw this quote by the captain hijacked by pirates who agreed to trade his life for his men -

"I am just a bit part in this story, the small part of a seaman doing the best he can like all the other seamen out there."

God bless our MB men who are just doing the best they can.

Every man doesn't get the chance for fight with pirates, but they are heros just the same.

Why in the world would a wife NOT like this book???

It gave incredible insight and helped me to see men in a completely different light...it helps to clarify what drives them and why.

It's an awesome book and I highly recommend it.