wow, what a mixed bag of emotions... we've been seperated for 2.5 mos. just found out day before yesterday that we're pregnant.

the kicker is, 3 years ago, i had a vasectomy... part of me says, yes these things do happen... they say the chances are 2 in 1,000... the other part of me says, yes you are sterile... i was tested w/in a week of the procedure and received the "all clear".

I had considered getting rechecked, but quite frankly I'm afraid that doing so may lead me to "opening a can of worms" that I don't want to address... I don't hold suspicion that she has had an affair, other than she is pregnant, and i'm supposedly sterile.

we talked about this quite a bit... she said if i want a DNA test after the birth, she is okay w/ it... I believe that by my doing so, there is a presumption that I don't trust her faithfulness to me? Does this make sense to anyone other than me?

I had regreted the procedure after having it done... I've wanted another child. And quite frankly I'm estatic over this news, but baffled at the same time...

this gift has brought about the decision of her moving back home and working on our relationship, and raising our children together... i'm afraid of spoiling the blessings by my bewilderment...

Can you get a fertility test done on yourself without her knowing? That would probably be the first thing to do.

If the possibility of raising someone else's kid doesn't bother you, then don't get the test done. If there are any doubts that it may be yours or not (she will know if she has SF with someone else, and owes you the truth, so ask), then get the test done. It could be a very good or a very bad result, so you might just have to roll the dice and play the cards that are dealt. Remember that if she fooled around and got pregnant by the OM, it's her responsibility, not yours. Don't blame yourself or feel guilty for leaving that problem for her to handle all alone. Just my opinion, so take it for what it's worth.

HI,

I have a friend whose H recently had a vascetomy, the current practice of testing afterwards is to test the first time 3-4 weeks additionaly check every two weeks for a total of 12 weeks after the procedure was done.

Please, by all means, go have another test done, of course even if you do and it comes back all clear you never can be positive that some little buggers didn't get through at some point. I think if you make sure she knows that you are thrilled about the baby that she would have no problems with you beign tested again, so that you know a little more for future reference if there is the possiblities of it happening again.

How many men have helped conceive more than one baby after a vasc? I have never heard the statistics on that one, and would be curious to hear.

It is rare, but it does happen. I know a wonderful little girl who was born that way.

Your wife's openness about saying the test is OK with her makes me think its yours biologically. Even if not, there are some wonderful dads who "make" their wife's baby theirs. K comes to mind...he has a great story if you want to look for it.

I'm not sure anyone can advise you on whether to have the test or not...think hard about what you need to be at peace, and what you would do with the info if it didn't turn out the way you want it to.

Whatever you decide, good luck.

Kathi

When women find out they are pregnant in odd circumstances, there is the fear that the guy will demand a test (happened to me once), so it sounds to me like she is heading that off. It is a rare circumstance when a man with a vasectomy fertilizes a child, but it is not unheard of. I think you should wait until the baby is born to make any decision.

My friends sister became pregnant after her husband had a vasectomy. Unfortunately, when the husband was in the delivery room and the baby was being born, the baby was the wrong color. The mother and her husband were of the white race and the baby was of the black race. Whoops!

When my H had his vasectomy, they wanted two consecutive negative tests then suggested a test a year after wards. Can you arrange to have a quick test done without her knowledge? Like another poster said, I imagine that in her offering she's pretty darn sure. I would offer too considering the circumstances. (I don't think she'd be that upset if you said you wanted the test after she offered.)

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">the kicker is, 3 years ago, i had a vasectomy... part of me says, yes these things do happen... they say the chances are 2 in 1,000... the other part of me says, yes you are sterile... i was tested w/in a week of the procedure and received the "all clear". </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I had a vasectomy 10 years ago and the urologist that performed the operation had me tested 1 month after the procedure, and he said that it was because viable sperm cells ,on the other side of the severed vans deferens leading to the urethra, could still be alive weeks after the vasectomy. He even told me a story regarding a good friend of his that he performed the procedure on and how he told him not to have unprotected sex for the first 30 days after the procedure with his W because of the possibility of impregnating her. Well his friend did not listen and sure enough he impregnated his W and accused the poor woman of having cheated on him, until the good doctor stepped in and asked him if he remembered what he had told him about not having unprotected sex within the first 30 days after the procedure. DOH!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

I would suggest that you get rechecked because if you don't there will always be the suspicion hanging over both of you which in of itself IS a 'can of worms'. AND because if you are still 'fertile' you need to consider what options you want to persue so as not to impregnatate you W once again.

I geuss what comes to mind for me is that you had your vasectomy 3 YEARS ago, not 3 months ago. I would wonder. Why after 3 yrs of sex did she just now pop pregnant? Unless of course you weren't having much sex during those 3 yrs.
I personally would have my suspisicions.

I was engaged to a man who had a vasectomy. Two years after the vasectomy, I got pregnant, and it was his. (miscarried). He accused me of being unfaithful, then later went and had it rechecked. Guess what, there were some live ones in there.

OH MY GAWD..
Maybe *I* should have the surgery then...
instead of H going for the vasectomy...
I think I want the tubal lit. done.
I want to be sure!
I definately don't want to become pregnant again, and H seems so adamant about this...

Carina,

Unfortunately the tubal is even less effective than the vasc. After I had my tubal my next doc gave me an atricle to read that said the latest studies that 2 in 50 women who have tubals no matter how intensive they were (cut, burned and stapled) got pregnant again after 5 years. Much better to have the vasc.

Yup, knew someone that got pregnant 10 years after H had V. Can you say SURPRISE?

Besides being more effective than a tubal ligation, it is less expensive and with less possible complications.

I have endured much more pain at the dentist office than when I had my vasectomy. Yet convincing my fellow brothers of this fact is like pulling teeth. Go figure <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

I didn't need to hear that. 4 years ago, we decided no more children. I knew H would not do the V, so I decided to inquire in the tubal. Before I could even call the Dr. I'm prego again. (on pill, did not forget to take any). So first words out of my mouth were, what do I have to do to have a tubal. Maybe menopause will come early (please) I'm too old to have anymore children.

Don't do what nasakid says, that's terrible advice.

I think that happening is more common than you think, getting PG after a V. There is a family I know here in my town. They HAD 3 children decided to have the V. Oops....along comes baby #4. Still some live ones. Dr. says, that happens sometimes, will really get you good this time. Check, recheck, check him again....been 1 year...did the one year check up, Dr. says, your outta the woods, no more condoms...alls safe, OOPS...Preggo #5!!! Dr. feels so bad, they are in such shock, all test confirm it's the fathers. Dr. is paying medical expenses.

Stranger things have happened! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Hi there,
just wanted to say, my H had this done 18 years ago. He went in for 3 months until the tests said that the operation was successfull.

I would for sure get a TEST made to see if your operation was a success!!!!!!!!!!!
I would want to know this for sure!!!!!!!!!!

I agree with Nasakid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I would tell my wife and not do this secretly!!!!!! It was your operation and therefore you have the right to know if the operation was really done correctly!!!!!!!!!!!
BB

w/o a clue,
This is a no brainer. Go get tested ASAP.

Found this info:

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Recanalization is the development of a channel for sperm flow between the two cut ends of the vas. If this happens during the healing process (early), the semen never becomes sperm-free until the vasectomy is repeated. If recanalization happens late (months or years after a man's semen has been examined and declared sperm-free), an unplanned pregnancy could result; but the odds of this occurring is far less after vasectomy than the odds of pregnancy with any other form of birth control including birth control pills and tubal ligation (female sterilization). </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Some sources cite the incidence of spontaneous recanalization as 1-3 per thousand, others say 1 in 4,000. Apparently, the manner in which the ends were sealed can make a difference, but either way, it IS rare.

I hope things go well for you & your W. As for me (who's H had a V years ago), I find this just a bit scary though!

Kathi