Massively impressed with the post. Wish I could find the words and the spine to set up the boundaries. Maybe that would help. You are one tough cookie and I respect that.
Thanks

Noodle,
I've read over your post and I can relate very deeply. After reading I was left with a noticeably sized Question mark smacked in the middle of my forehead, and it reads:
how do I know if I'm setting a boundary and not exacting revenge, as in punishment for my WW's mistreatment of my heart?
I am almost free of resentment, at least I ache to be free of the fingerpointing because there are no winners only losers and everywhere we go there we are..

I wish to go be me and fortify my position with those boundaries that you spoke of, but I've never been the type of person with my own *personal space and to create that space now seems somewhat divisive when its unity and sharing that I crave.

What do WS's turned BS's and BS's turned WS's have to fear or loathe?
We've already been hurt or have hurt the most deserving and least deserving people directly while indirectly being the worst mates fathomable, so why boundaries now? Boundaries were best used pre-A, and as protection from OP not W or H???

I did have a point, but the frustration seems to overtake me sometimes...

answer if you can make sense...Thanks